by John Walters

Starting Five

Go v. Wade

The Miami Heat, the team for whom Dwyane Wade played 13 years, offered two years and $40 million.

The Chicago Bulls, the team he grew up rooting for as a native of the city, offered two years and $47 million.

I honestly don’t know the disparity in income since the Heat play in a tax-free state, meaning that 41 of Wade’s “performances” would not be taxed there (43, actually, considering Orlando) whereas at least 77 of his as a Bull will be. Anyway, Wade turns 35 in January and has had shoulder and knee surgeries the past few years, but he still averaged 19 points per game last season and he still looks good naked. Still, Pat Riley made the right move. He’ll say all the right things but the Blue Book value on Wade tells you this was another Kobe Tour waiting to happen.

He’ll team up with fellow Marquette alum Jimmy Butler in Chicago next season, and as Milwaukee is about a two-hour drive north, this isn’t the worst promotional move the Bulls have ever made.

2. Fed, Up

Is he the greatest? Roger Federer, who owns more Grand Slam titles (17) than anyone, survives at Wimbledon after trailing 2-0 to the palindromic Cilic (at about that point of the match you could find “It’s all over for Fed” and “He’ll never win another Grand Slam” tweets, six for a pound). He also overcame three match points to win in five sets in this quarterfinal match. With Novak Djokovic out and Rafael Nadal injured, his greatest obstacle to a Jack Nicklaus-like 18th major may be Scotland’s Andy Murray (“Present”).

Next up for Roger, in the semis: every Seinfeld fan’s favorite tennis player, Milos Raonic.

3. May The Schwartz Be With You

On Tuesday Dana Schwartz, an entertainment reporter at the Observer, wrote an open letter to the publication’s publisher, Jared Kushner, complaining that Republican presidential candidate Donald Trump panders to anti-Semites and other racists. As evidence she showed some of the tweets she’d received since originally calling out Trump’s “Most Corrupt Candidate Ever” tweet.

The problem: Tump is Kushner’s father-in-law (and Ivanka could become the Veep!).

Yesterday, the Empire Struck Back, as Kushner penned an open letter that began, “My father-in-law is not an anti-Semite.” Kushner failed to address the pertinent issue—that his pop-in-law panders to racists and empowers them with his hateful diatribes—but did manage to remind everyone that the paper’s readership is up three-fold in the past two years.

This probably won’t go too well for Schwartz, at least as it relates to her longevity at that publication. But Kushner, who is Jewish and whose letter contained enough heart-wrenching personal family stories to make Schindler’s List II, will still be wealthy

4. Fox and Fiends

Former Fox and Friends co-anchor Gretchen Carlson (yes, of course, she’s from Minnesota with a name like that) filed a sexual harassment suit against Fox News prez Roger Ailes on Wednesday. Carlson, 50, claims in the suit that when she met with Ailes to discuss what she felt was discriminatory treatment, he said, “‘I think you and I should have had a sexual relationship a long time ago and then you’d be good and better and I’d be good and better,’ adding that ‘sometimes problems are easier to solve’.”

Oh, do you now? Carlson was let go by Fox on June 23. Meanwhile, the law firm representing Carlson says they’ve already fielded calls from 10 women wanting to talk to them about how Ailes harassed them. Consider the source, sure, and Ailes will claim that some of those women (or all of them) are after an easy pay day. Either way, stay tuned.

5. Jon Jones Pall

He was supposed to fight in the main event of UFC 200, which is kind of a big deal, as MMA people will tell you (MH’s resident MMA beat reporter, is off this week…um, decade), but now Jon Jones, 28, is out after reportedly failing a drug test. The 6’4″ fighter, who was suspended six months last year by MMA after a felony hit-and-run incident in Albuquerque (Did Jimmy McGill make that go away? He only got 18 months of supervised probation) could be suspended two years and Dana White doesn’t forget when you do him like that. The real losers are Daniel Cormier, who was scheduled to fight Jones and now misses his chance in the spotlight, and anyone who bought this event on Pay Per View.

Music 101

Let’s Get It On

How cool was Marvin Gaye? His first name was “Marvin” and no one ever gave it a second thought. His last name was Gaye and again, no one cared. It should almost be a crime to play this tune, which hit No. 1 for two weeks in September of 1973, in the daylight hours. On April Fool’s Day, 1984, Gaye’s father fatally shot him after he intervened in a dispute between his parents. Gaye was 44.

Remote Patrol

Euro Semis

France vs. Germany 

3 p.m. ESPN

Many will consider this the de facto final, even though that’s a Latin word and we have Les Bleus meeting Die Mannschaft. Anyway, winner takes on Portugal and claims possession of Alsace-Lorraine, so there’s much at stake….au poivre.