If NBA commissioner Adam Silver really wants to make a statement about the load management scourge currently plaguing the NBA—both LeBron James and Anthony Davis sat out the Lakers’ game in Brooklyn—New York City!—last night—the Phoenix Suns forward Mikal Bridges should be named an All-Star this season.
Bridges, a silky 6’7″ lefty, has not missed a game this season. The fifth-year pro has never missed a game. Not in the NBA nor while he was at Villanova, where he he won two national championships. Quick: name an NBA starter who won two NCAA titles in college. I believe I just named all of them.*
*Wrong, JW. Also, Jalen Brunson.
Bridges has started all 52 of the Suns’ games this season. Here are the other four starters’ numbers: Deandre Ayton, 43. Devin Booker, 31. Chris Paul, 29. Cam Johnson, 14. But at least most of those are injury-related. Name a great NBA player who has not sat out a game this season. Even two-time reigning MVP Nikola Jokic has missed eight or nine games.
But it’s not only Bridges’ reliability that makes him extraordinary. He is arguably the league’s top defender. And, in any situation where Devin Booker is not on the court, he is the Suns’ go-to scorer (just narrowly edging out Chris Paul). His mid-range jumper is pure cashmere. Bridges is averaging a career-high 16.8 points per game this season. He’s not a head case. He plays the game right. And he’s always on the court. Woody Allen once aid, correctly, that “80% of success is just showing up.” And that’s Mikal Bridges.
Make him an All-Star, commish.
Mahomes Court Advantage
We missed most of both NFL games this weekend, but we will note that Pat Mahomes just played in his fifth AFC Championship Game in as many NFL seasons. And all five have been played at Arrowhead. That’s credit to the Chiefs and Mahomes for winning as many regular-season games as they do. As you may or may not recall, the 17-0 Miami Dolphins of 1972 actually had to play their AFC Championship Game in Pittsburgh that season because the NFL rotated home sites by division back then.
Here’s a note from SportsBrain: in the Super Bowl era, no quarterback has led the league in passing yardage AND won the Super Bowl in the same year. This season Mahomes led the NFL in passing yards with 5,250. The next closest QB, Justin Herbert, was nearly 500 yards south of him. Oh, and Tom Brady finished third in case you’re wondering whether or not he’s going to retire.
Never Change, Pat Beverley
Laker guard Pat Beverley may be the most irritating player in the NBA, but it’s good to know that it’s not only opposing guards that he annoys. If you missed it, PatBev earned a technical late in Saturday night’s Lakers-Celtics game when he approached a referee with stop-action proof that the call on the court was wrong. We admire this chutzpah. Funniest moment of the season, no?
Also, if this does not become the most common GIF on social media to show someone that his claim is false, we’re failing as a species.
R.I.P., Angela
We’re not into ripping SNL as often as most on social media, or into claiming that we haven’t watched it since (YOUR FAVORITE MOVIE OR STREAMING STAR’S NAME HERE) left the show. People were proudly claiming they don’t watch SNL any more back when Bill Hader, Jason Sudeikis, Kate McKinnon, Kristen Wiig, Will Forte and Ralph Armisen were in the cast. So, no, just don’t.
That said, this season with the influx of newbies has been…bad. And it’s not the cast. It’s the sketch ideas. So we look for “Weekend Update” as our safe harbor. At least Jost and Che are always reliable. And then there’s Heidi Gardner, who owns the two most reliable characters for WU in awhile: Angela, the girlfriend of the fighter (“I’m takin’ the kids to my sister’s…”) and teen influencer Bailey Gismert.
Last Saturday, it feels, SNL bid adieu to the former character by contriving a way to pair her with Michael B. Jordan (eponymous star of Creed) in a bit that you really cannot come back from. So that just leaves us Bailey. Gardner is the current cast member most likely to hit it big in Hollywood, as she already has leading lady looks and she’s shown her acting chops on many an occasion. When I watch SNL it always surprises me that they cannot find at least four other humans, male or female, with comparable talent. Should it really be that difficult?
Who else stands out in this cast? Chloe Fineman, Kenan Thompson (of course), Mikey Day and Bowen Yang. Sarah Sherman has potential. But the writing needs to improve.
Dollar Quiz
The Canadian province due west of Ontario is… (this was on Jeopardy! last night and no one got it).
Name one team from the inaugural 1967-68 ABA season that is not a current NBA franchise.
Napoleon famously lost at Waterloo, which is located in what country currently?
What does a diamond and a piece of coal have in common (best answer only)?
True/False: “Arby’s” name comes from the acronym R.B., for “roast beef.”
Another match, this time a semi, another straight sets win for Novak Djokovic at the Australian Open. The oft-surly Serbian is into the final after a 7-5, 6-1, 6-2 washing of Yank Tommy Paul earlier today. In six matches thus far the Djoker has lost all of one set—he’s won 18 of 19— and that was a 7-5 (7-6) tug-of-war versus unheralded Enzo Couacaud (I’d like to buy vowel). He’s doing all of this at age 35 with a strained hammy.
You could’ve gotten +180 odds on the Djoker to win the tourney a week ago after he strained his hammy during a match. At the time it seemed 50/50 if he’d bow out of the tourney. But Djoker knows that the Aussie is for him tantamount to Rafael Nadal’s ownership of the French: he’s won eight of the past 12 tourneys there and it might be nine if he had not been sent out back from Down Under last January for refusing to be vaxxed.
So here he is, just a championship match against Stefan Tsitsipas from tying Rafael Nadal with 22 men’s singles grand slam wins. We are witnessing history here, tennis fans. A trio such as Roger Federer, Nadal and the Djoker will not be seen again in our lifetimes. I feel pretty confident saying that. The idea that the three winningest men in tennis history were each other’s contemporaries speaks volumes as to just how far ahead of everyone else they have been.
Extreme Stupidity From Opposite Extremes
Isn’t it weird that @BuffaloBills Damar Hamlin was the biggest story for two weeks. Now we have media silence. Not a social media post from him, picture, or live video.
Somethings fishy. @NFL is either covering up his death, or he’s in bad shape.
Here’s first-ballot Batshit Crazy Hall of Famer/ex-Major Leaguer Aubrey Huff intimating that there’s something scandalous about the fact that Buffalo Bill defensive back Damar Hamlin (the Immaculate Resuscitation!) has made no public appearances since his brush with death three weeks ago. We already knew that Huff was a birther; turns out that he’s also a deather.
We deleted an earlier tweet because of an inappropriate reference to French people. We did not intend to offend.
Writing French people, French citizens, etc., is good. But "the" terms for any people can sound dehumanizing and imply a monolith rather than diverse individuals.
But the stupidity is not limited to the far right. Here’s the AP Stylebook ruling from on high (it’s not quite Pope Francis proclaiming that homosexuality is not a crime, but it’s up there) that using “the” before a group of people (e.g., “the French”, “the Russians”) is offensive. Last we checked, their organization is referred to as “the Associated Press.” Did they just cancel themselves?
Oh, and by the way, Nikki Haley, “you must be a citizen to vote” is not a bold or polarizing stance. Everyone I know agrees. To put it out this way as if only the GOP owns this belief is ridiculous.
My Levito/A Mosquito
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FwTh1i-LPZE
America’s new “It” girl in figure skating is 15 year-old Isabeau Levito from Mount Holly, N.J. Levito, who has never failed to reach the podium in any event in the past six years, was not in Beijing last winter, but look for her to be a medal favorite in Italy in 2026. The 2022 Junior World Champion is currently competing in the U.S. Figure Skating Championships in San Jose this weekend.
Duel vs Jaws
Two nights ago TCM aired the 1971 film, Duel, which was released as a TV movie on ABC back when that was a big deal. It is noteworthy and I stayed up to watch it because it was Steven Spielberg’s first feature-length film. Widely praised and ahead of its time, Duel is basically Mad Max: Fury Road without ever supplying a valid reason as to why our protagonist is on a road-rage fight for his life almost throughout.
As I watched it, though, what hit me is how often Spielberg would later plagiarize from his debut while shooting his magnum opus, the similarly four-lettered movie Jaws, only four years later. The tanker truck becomes the shark, and Dennis Weaver’s mid-level businessman becomes Chief Brody. There’s an early scene, shot from the passenger seat of Weaver’s red Plymouth Dart, looking toward the driver. It’s a tight shot and suddenly we see the truck whiz past. It’s like that scene in Jaws when Brody is shoveling chum and the shark makes its grand entrance.
The climactic scene involves Weaver going for broke, driving his car directly at the truck, a life-or-death jousting match. The ensuing collision will result in an explosion and a slo-mo shot of all the carnage that ensues as our hero narrowly survives. Sounds like any movie you know?
I was a little surprised that our host, Ben Mankiewicz, never mentioned this. Also, having not seen The Fabelmans, is that how this film ends as well?
And Finally…
Pardon me for being coy here. This is, admittedly, not the paragon of professionalism but I have another full-time job these days totally unrelated to journalism, so I’m just posting this for the receipt at a later date.
Last fall I wrote a story for SI titled “Open Season” that was universally ignored by my pals in the media on Twitter. That’s okay. I may have whined about it then. I definitely did.
So why am I back on this topic? Folks in the Phoenix area may soon be hearing about a murder that took place this month in which a player from that Chaparral freshman football team is one of four teens charged. It’s obviously a tragedy: the victim was a completely innocent teenage girl. But, it’s also the first dent in the plan of Chaparral’s athletic department, its booster club and a few Chaparral dads to rule the Open Division for the next three years. Which was possible and may still be.
The legendary golf writer Dan Jenkins once opined, like 20 years ago, that the only thing that could prevent Tiger Woods from obliterating Jack Nicklaus’ record was women. It was a flippant comment (and obviously the fairer sex is not to blame; Tiger is) but accurate. Those who follow Chaparral, myself included, have always thought that the only thing that could beat the Firebirds was life away from football.
Finally, I don’t want to paint with a broad brush. First, details of the incident are still forthcoming (the young man in question was most likely simply in the wrong place at the wrong time and not the shooter). Second, the young men I know best on that team are good students with their heads and hearts firmly in the right place. They’re dedicated and motivated.
You should be hearing more soon.
DOLLAR QUIZ
What NFL franchise has the highest regular-season winning percentage?
Name the previous two cities that the Los Angeles Clippers called home.
In what present-day U.S. state did the Meadows Massacre take place?
What was the Wright Brothers’ primary job before their interest in flight took over?
Provide one factual item about the longest MLB game, in terms of innings, ever played: number of innings, who won, who played, year it took place, etc.
What were the first names of Lewis & Clark? Meriwether Lewis and William Clark
Air Supply had eight Top 5 hits. The Little River Band had nine Top 20 hits. Name one member of either Australian band (I can not, off the top of my head). Air Supply: Russell Hitchcock and Graham Russell (why didn’t they call themselves Graham Russell Hitchcock?!? Massive Fail; LRB: Glenn Shorrock, lead vocals: Beeb Birtles, lead guitar. LRB have had 30 members since inception and we don’t have the time)
The ’85 Chicago Bears lost one regular season game. Who beat them and in what venue? Miami Dolphins, Orange Bowl, on Monday Night Football.
Who is the NBA’s all-time scoring leader among left-handed players? James Harden
What actual historic event is the springboard for all of the shenanigans in the 1959 classic Some Like It Hot?St. Valentine’s Day Massacre
Did We Watch/Listen To The Same Game?
In the wake of San Francisco’s 19-12 victory over Dallas in the divisional playoffs, Twitter seemed overly obsesses with two items from that game:
A) the final play, and
B) Greg Olsen’s work in the booth for Fox
Neither of which made any sense to me.
Olsen, in his rookie season as a color commentator, was roundly hailed as the greatest thing since Tony Romo (who was rightly crushed for his piss-poor job in the Bengals-Bills game…maybe he was suffering from stage-frost…but hey, Tony, you’ll never have to return the money, will you?). Don Van Natta of ESPn fame even went out of his way to toss bouquets Olsen’s way on the Tweet Deck. And he was far from the only one.
I like Olsen just fine. The former Pro Bowl tight end brings good energy and he genuinely seems to care. But, in the fourth quarter alone, here are some of the questionable plays/decisions he failed to comment on. Again, it’s not that he had the wrong take, in my opinion. He had ZERO take. And that’s his job:
KaVontae Turpin’s kickoff return: Dallas trailed 16-12, I believe, when Turpin fielded San Fran’s kickoff to the left of the left hash mark. It looked as if the return was set up that way, but the speedster made a bold cut to his right and raced upfield untouched in the center of the field. Only two 49ers stood between he and paydirt (one of them the kicker) and the two tacklers were bunched near one another. If Turpin cuts right or sharply left he is gone. Touchdown. Instead—and sure, it’s easy for me to say, this was a split-second thing—Turpin runs directly into them. They didn’t tackle him as much as they did get in his way. The return was still very good, giving Dallas field position near their own 40-45, but it should have been six. Olsen and Burkhardt never opined on this; they simply noted that it was a fantastic return.
Mike McCarthy’s decision to punt on 4th-and-10 or so with 2:34 left in the game. The Cowboys trail 19-12 and are backed up behind their own 20, so if the play fails, the season’s pretty much over. But by kicking it away, you take the chance that you’ll not get another offensive play the rest of the season. Yes, you have three timeouts plus the two-minute warning, but this is a decision that merits cost-benefit analysis. Olsen provided none. Props to he and Burkhardt for noting that Dallas dithered away at least 20-25 precious seconds deciding what to do, but the moment called for Olsen at least suggesting that Dallas does not HAVE to punt here. Maybe fortune favors the bold.
Dallas ultimately does receive one more chance as San Fran punts from midfield. Dallas’ returner calls for a fair catch AT THE SIX-YARD LINE. What are you doing??? Let the ball bounce and maybe it heads to the end zone. If it does not, given the situation, is it really that much worse if San Fran downs it at your two. Either catch the ball and take off or let it go. As a punt returner you must know where you are standing on the field and, in that critical moment, the consequences of your actions. Why are you fair-catching a ball at the six-yard line when your team has no timeouts and a little more than 30 seconds to play??? Olsen never mentions it.
Dallas’ final play. Yes, it looked silly in terms of its result, but here’s the point that Olsen missed aas did everyone I saw on Twitter. There were still :06 on the clock. All you need to do to get a second play is to get out of bounds with :01. Two plays in six seconds if you can run the first in five (doable) and get out of bounds. Yes, Dalton Schultze had erred on the previous play and, yes, it was all a long shot at this point, but given all of that, the smarter thing to do here is to try and get 15-20 yards on a sideline route before attempting a final play. If you can advance the ball to the 45 or 50, Dak Prescott can uncork one to the goal line or damn near close. Understand that in the fog of war with no timeouts that Dallas panicked and failed to register all of this, but this is why coaches are paid so well. It’s also why No. 1 analysts are paid so well. Olsen failed to suggest this. To suggest that with :06 Dallas still has time to call two plays and that they should not be resorting to this gadget play at this moment. Or at least that it’s not their only option. He never mentioned it, insted keying on the bizarre formation. Noteworthy, but not the only point to be made in that moment.
I’d like to be the Czar of Sports Television now, please. Thank you.
Steve Hartman Just Feels Genuine
I’ve been quite taken with the pieces that Steve Hartman has been filing for CBS Sunday Morning lately. I don’t know anything about Hartman, but just since Christmas he’s delivered three bangers: about the white man in Colorado who bought a piano for a gifted African immigrant boy who displayed virtuouso skills before even taking a lesson; about the class in Minnesota that raised $300,000 so that its physically handicapped classmates could have playground equipment that fit their needs; and here, about Josiah Johnson, the Kentucky middle-schooler who made his basketball team despite having been born with no legs.
I have no way to prove it, and this may obviously be a product of my own bias, but when I watch Hartman’s pieces, they feel genuinely wrought. Unlike when I watch any Tom Rinaldi piece on ESPN or, now, Fox. I’ve always felt that Rinaldi’s pieces are about manipulating the audience’s emotion and that deep down Rinaldi only cares about that. Whereas I feel that Hartman genuinely feels what he is saying when he speaks to these kids.
Can I prove this? No. Am I being unfair to Rinaldi and giving Hartman too much credit? Your call. But if I were at TV executive, I’d know whom to keep and whom to let go. Because that would matter to me more than audience share. Which is why I’m not a TV executive.
Load Management or Road Management
In this, the Year of Our Lord 2023, the NBA is experiencing an epidemic of players sitting out games who are not particularly injured or even ill (hung over, maybe; but not sick). It’s called “load management” and it’s the latest issue (the other being traveling) that’s creating a chasm between Boomer NBA fans and Millennial NBA fans.
Steve Kerr, who’s more of a boomer by age, recently apologized that his Hall of Fame backcourt of Steph and Klay sat out the team’s only game in Cleveland this season (payback for the Cavs coming back from down 3-1 in 2016, maybe?) due to load management issues. Kerr actually suggested a 72-game regular season, which is comical. Would he like taking a 12% pay cut also with cutting out 12% of the regular season?
Yo, we get it. The NBA postseason is all that really matters and with the league expanding the number of teams that make it (20 of the NBA’s 30 teams will qualify for at least one knockout game), it’s understandable why you’d rest your stars in January. The Phoenix Suns, for example, are forging a much stronger squad by taking their L’s now and giving their backups meaningful minutes. Now when the Suns have even three starters in the lineup they seem invincible (last week Phoenix was missing seven of its top eight players–only Mykal Bridges is indestructible—and it was not a pretty sight; none of those missing seven were seriously hurt; now Phoenix has THREE starters back and they’ve won four in a row, often putting up 25-point leads against the likes of Brooklyn and Memphis; they won by 31 last night versus Charlotte… minus two of their three All-Star quality starters).
On the other hand, NBA travel is cushier than ever. Private jets. Four Seasons suites. Teams back in the day of Larry and Magic still flew commercial and the level of physical therapy was nowhere near where it is today (then again, maybe that’s why Bird did not last as long as LeBron will).
Well, instead of arguing both sides of this situation, we’re proposing a situation. Occasional NBA Jamboree weekends: Four teams, five days, one venue. Each team plays three games over a four-day period, but they never leave the town or hotel. No travel. Kind of like the Bubble situation in Orlando during the summer of ’20. An example:
Everyone meets in Phoenix.
Friday: Lakers-Suns, Clippers-Warriors
Saturday: Lakers-Warriors
Sunday: Clippers-Suns
Monday: Lakers-Clippers, Suns-Warriors
No one plays more than a back-to-back, but everyone gets three games in four days. No one boards a plane (If you do not know the rules, NBA teams must attempt to be in the city they play in on, say, a Monday, by leaving on Sunday night…so no matter how later your game ends, you cannot sleep in that city, wake up, and board a flight the next morning if you’re playing back to backs; you’ve got to board that plane sometimes close to midnight and then maybe not arrive in your hotel room before 4 a.m. for a game that you’ll play that same night).
I love this idea, even if it is mine. What say you? The four teams can either split the gage or rotate to all four venues since they all must play one another four times in the season. Not only do you knock out more games in less time with no travel, but that frees up more days the rest of the season for other travel games. Your thoughts?
Dollar Quiz
Who was the last U.S. president to not even attend college (hint: he’d later become a lawyer, as the standards were different then)?
What was the largest denomination U.S. bill that was ever actually in circulation (I’ll throw you an extra dollar if you knew whose face was on it)?
What are the three rivers that are associated with Three Rivers Stadium (which no longer exists)?
What was unique about the Oakland Raiders’ center during the team’s 1970 hey day?
Put these three in order of when they became independent countries, as they remain today: Mexico, Poland, USA.
Farewell to one of the giants of rock and roll’s primordial era, David Crosby, who passed yesterday at the age of 81. Crosby sang harmony on “Turn Turn Turn” with The Byrds and on “Suite: Judy Blue Eyes,” “Carry On,” and “Southern Cross”* with Crosby, Stills & Nash. He played Woodstock.
This is more than FORTY YEARS after the song was released. Still smokin’.
Crosby spent years in addiction, then in recovery. With that crazy mustache, mischievous grin and schlubby bod, he almost came off as the most approachable of rock legends. Asked in the outstanding 2018 documentary “Echo In The Canyon” why CSN&Y broke up, he was blunt and funny. “Because I was an asshole,” he told Jakob Dylan.
A wonderful soul. A ground-floor member of rock and roll history.
*A quick word on “Southern Cross,” which I recommend anyone listen to again. It was released in 1982 and never cracked the Top 15. A shame. But that was peak New Wave era and also hair metal was just taking hold and of course, the MTV. A band like CSN seemed like a hopeless anachronism at the time. It was simply not appreciated at the time.
Dollar Quiz
What were the first names of Lewis & Clark?
Air Supply had eight Top 5 hits. The Little River Band had nine Top 20 hits. Name one member of either Australian band (I can not, off the top of my head).
The ’85 Chicago Bears lost one regular season game. Who beat them and in what venue?
Who is the NBA’s all-time scoring leader among left-handed players?
What actual historic event is the springboard for all of the shenanigans in the 1959 classic Some Like It Hot?
Two months from now, she’s going to look five years younger (take it from someone who had to wake up at 4:45 a.m. four times a week this time last year for 7:30 a.m. classses and yet was still scolded by his dean for not appreciating all the hardships his students underwent)
Kicking The Hobbit
New Zealand prime minister Jacinda Arden announces that she is resigning, leaving Finland’s Sanna Martin as the undisputed most attractive world leader (or Justin Trudeau, if you like). Arden, 42, who is married with one child, really seems to want to spend time with her family. Without a scandal precipitating said decision. If only more leaders would leave before we had to carry them out the door, Joe Paterno/Bill Belichick/Last two presidents/Al Michaels yada yada yada.
R.I.P. Chris Ford
This photo a reminder that the Nets desperately need to bring these unis back
Farewell to the first player in NBA history to make a three-point shot (of course, hundreds had done it in the ABA years before). Chris Ford, who just turned 74 a week ago, has passed. He connected on his three on Oct. 12, 1979, a 114-107 home win versus the Houston Rockets. Boston’s other shot heard ’round the world.
That game was probably just as memorable for being Larry Bird’s NBA debut. Ford was the most unlikely looking starter on Larry Bird’s rookie year Celtics team. The other three besides those two were Nate Archibald (a former league scoring champ, despite standing about 6’0″), Cedric Maxwell and Dave Cowens (a former league MVP).
Anyway, Ford, a scrappy 6’5″ guard out of Villanova, would lead the Celtics with 70 threes that season, the league’s first with the new arc (Brian Taylor of the San Diego Clippers would lead the league with 90). He’d play two more years with the Celtics, winning one NBA championship, before retiring. Oddly Ford played seven seasons with the Pistons and never started a game. Then he joined the Larry Bird Celtics and started about 75% of the time his final three seasons. Cue “Crafty Veteran” montage.
Ruud Awakening
For the second time in as many days a top 1 or 2 seed at the Australian Open loses to an unheralded American. First time the top two seeds at the Aussie Open are out this early since 2002. Last night it was No. 2 seed Casper Ruud, who lost to some snowboarder named Jensen Brooksby (c’mon, that moniker totally screams “Snowboarder!”). At least Ruud won one set, unlike No. 1 seed Rafael Nadal the previous night.
Meanwhile, Novak Djokovic won his 23rd consecutive match in Melbourne, though he’s now nursing a tender hamstring. Ten bucks says that if Djokovic were vaxxed, Clay Travis would be blaming his tender hammy on Dr. Fauci.
Dollar Quiz
One president, born in the United States, grew up not speaking English as a first language. Name either the president or the language he spoke.
What FBS school has never sent a team to the NCAA men’s basketball tournament?
There are at least three popular songs that mention a city in Arizona. Name the three cities, and then either the song or artist or both.
True/False: Texas is larger than France.
Connect Sir Laurence Olivier and Bill Murray in two movies (“X appeared in FILM1 with Y, who appeared in FILM2 with Z”).
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