by John Walters*

*I’m not “back.” I’m simply here right now. Believe those were Jesus’ first words to the apostles as soon as they finished the inaugural Easter brunch (writer boy has a messianic complex… to accompany all his other issues). Anyway, after years of waking up in a five-story apartment, often huddling beneath a blanket on the couch as I typed this before taking a subway to work or heading out to serve diners, it’s nice to wake up in the desert on the ground floor and embark on long morning constitutional before sunrise. I’ll type here occasionally between semesters, but it’s nice to be living more of an al fresco existence. Highly recommend. Just don’t move here, please. Kthanxbye.

Urban Out (Fitting)

After 13 games, two wins, one failed Tim Tebow career resuscitation, an ill-fated lap boogie and a kicked kicker, Urban Meyer is out as coach of the Jacksonville Jaguars. Meyer, often considered (justifiably so) as, at worst, one of the top three coaches in college football this century, has always been problematic. But also, too, before this experiment, successful.

Even as a studio analyst at Fox, Meyer was fantastic. Had he stuck around there another season, Meyer likely would have had his pick of gigs at USC, Oklahoma, LSU or even a return to Gainesville. Now he’s just another wealthy, miserable, middle-aged man in Florida headed toward a divorce and a pickle ball game in The Villages.

Oh, Bitch!-uary

This funny and seriously irreverent obituary could only have been written by a gay, New York City-based son of the deceased. This appeared in multiple newspapers. The subject, above, is Renay Mandel Corren and the son/author is Andy Corren.

Look out, David Sedaris. You’ve got competition.

Thunder, Then Lightning

The finish of last night’s Pelicans-Thunder game was peak-This is what your insane range has wrought, Steph Curry. Thanks a lot…