We’re headed out on a Mission Persons road trip this week, i.e., “Destination Unknown.” All we know is that we won’t go east of Durango, if we even make it there. We’re not sure if or how often we’ll post. In the meantime, remember to “clap for King” in your daily lives. This is what it’s all about.
*The judges concede that this headline makes no sense
Beirut? Gaza? No, Surfside, Florida, a community on the peninsula between the Atlantic Ocean and Biscayne Bay. Authorities report four dead and 159 missing. As the bodies begin to get recovered, the lawsuits will begin flooding in as will the investigative journalistic pieces uncovering graft, shoddy contractors and payoffs to city officials to make all the regulations disappear. And then the Pulitzers.
How does this happen? And who rubber-stamping building inspections, etc., to allow such a tragedy. The earth did not move. A missile did not strike. Timothy McVeigh is in jail. This was most likely greed and dereliction of duty.
The top three finishers in the women’s 3,000-meter steeplechase in Eugene last night, the final event on last night’s card of the U.S Track and Field Trials, advance to Tokyo next month. With two laps to go, Leah Falland (above), appeared to be a shoo-in. She trailed American record-holder Courtney Frerichs and 2016 Olympic bronze medalist Emma Coburn, but no one else was near those three.
Then, jumping a hurdle, Falland landed awkwardly and fell—it appeared that both feet had cleared the hurdle without nicking it. She was on the ground. Falland, a two-time NCAA champion out of Michigan State, initially recovered well and maintained a fierce battle for third, but fell off in the final 200 meters. By the time she crossed the finish line, her last step or two was walking.
Coburn won. Frerichs finished second. Falland, who’d finished 14th in the 2016 Oly Trials and seemed in terrific position to book a ticket to Tokyo, faded to ninth. The Trials are where dreams come true, but so do nightmares.
Yesterday my old SI colleague Jeff Pearlman tweeted out the following:
And then I tweeted out some words about how the Angels, who full name notwithstanding are located in Anaheim, which is in Orange County, are just a microcosm of Orange County. People were not happy with me. Once again.
Newport Beach, Laguna Beach, Dana Point, Laguna Niguel, San Clemente, Mission Viejo. The Pacific Ocean.
I get it: Orange County is beautiful. But isn’t it just a little bit… dull? I’ve been there many times, but it’s dull. Irvine is a safe and lovely community in which to raise a family. Dull. Balboa Island is nice. But it feels contrived. As does much of The O.C. If you feel differently, please let me know I’m wrong.
I get it: ideally, Orange County is a wonderful place to live. Ideally, I used to tune in when a lovely actress or supermodel was going to appear on Letterman. But those guest spots—the exception being Julia Roberts—never lived up to the expectations.
Six months after surviving an attempted lynching at the U.S. Capitol, former vice president Mike Pence commits career suicide.
Don’t get us wrong: we admire him for what he said yesterday. It’s just that in the aftermath he is now a man without a party.
What did Pence say? Speaking at the Ronald Reagan Presidential Library in Simi Valley, Calif., yesterday, Pence said, “I will always be proud that we did our part on that tragic day to reconvene the Congress and fulfilled our duties under the Constitution and the laws of the United States. The truth is, there is almost no idea more un-American than the notion that any one person can choose the President.”
First, Brett Kavanaugh. Now this. Quite a week of candor and insight from former Trump bootlickers. Of course he’s correct and cheers to him for standing up or the Constitution publicly. Why didn’t he have the courage to do this six months ago, though?
We begin by noting that The Kid texted us this a.m. to note that since 2010 three teams have advanced to the Stanley Cup final that had the worst record among playoff teams that season while only two that had the best record had advanced. This is what The Kid excels at: He’s a human search engine and collector of minutiae.
This week, however, he’s not a very good picker. His pick, Las Vegas, lost last night. He’s at 20-11 and down to $230 in the bank. He says he’s going to consult an octopus at his local aquarium to make his next pick for him. So we wait.
Tonight The Kid likes TAMPA BAY minus-160 versus the Long Islanders in Game 7….
The NBA moved to a conference format 50 years ago. In all of those years, the most prolific scoring output from a player in his conference finals debut game is 48 points. By Trae Young of the Atlanta Hawks. Last night.
There were plenty of pundits (Doug Gottlieb stands out) who said that drafting Young after his freshman season out of Oklahoma was a mistake. He’s too small. He won’t be able to guard anyone in the NBA.
It’s a different game now, though. If you’re lethal from beyond the arc, and you can create your own shot off a drive if defenders crowd you beyond the arc, and if you can get to the free throw line, that overcomes plenty of defensive liabilities.
I don’t know if Atlanta can defeat the Bucks and Giannis. But if they do, the NBA Finals could be a showcase for a pair of emerging superstars: Young and (I’m hoping this doesn’t jinx my Suns) Devin Booker.
Here’s General Mark Milley, Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, providing the type of commentary you only see in a Frank Capra film.* It’s curious that 1) Milley graduated from the same university—West Point—as Mike Pompeo and even bears a striking resemblance to him, and yet is intellectually curious and not a bully, 2) Matt Gaetz of all people gives him a disappointed head shake as he listens and 3) this commentary incited Laura Ingraham to go into “defund-the-military” invective. It’s funny how Trumpers love the cops and military until either institution does not go along with their white supremacy platform.
*I’ve already shared an anecdote or two from the Capra autobiography I’m reading, “Frank Capra: The Name Above The Picture.” So I don’t want to spoil it too much only to say that his story from the day of the premiere of You Can’t Take It With You, the first of two consecutive movies he made with Jimmy Stewart, Jean Arthur and Edward Arnold, is simply unforgettable. This is a fantastic read.
Her name is Sky Brown, she is 12 years old and a British skateboarder. Next month she’ll become the youngest person to walk in the Opening Ceremony since Danish swimmer Inge Sorensen, also 12 at the time, did so in 1936. Sorensen won a bronze medal in swimming, a feat that so enraged Adolph Hitler that he invaded her country (I think).
Anyway, Brown would have been younger than Sorensen if the Olympics had been staged as scheduled. But she came precariously close to not being anywhere at all when this maneuver on the half-pipe went horribly awry. She suffered a broken wrist and some cranial stuff, but is back to boarding.
Today in “What’s Wrong With The USA?” (Where do we begin?)
2. A woman in Indiana, the first person involved in the January 6 insurrection to be sentenced for her crime, received no more than a $500 fine, three months’ probation and some community service work. This is no way to disabuse a cult of making a second attempt at insurrection. Personally, we prefer Madame DeFarge’s method of punishment for treason.
Oh, the humanity. Germany was playing Hungary in Munich. In Munich! And the Deutsch were unable to finish uber alles. And so The Kid loses a monster amount, $1,000. It’s time to buy him scuba gear. He’s 20-10 but at $365, or down $635 from where he began (even though he’s got a 66.7% in wins).
Germany had just tied the score when this happened in the second half.
The score finished 2-2 in the soccer match, by the way.
Today he likes VEGAS -135 versus Montreal. Loses $135 or wins $100. He never seems to pick the underdogs, does he?
What needed to happen for the Phoenix Suns to pull off the winning play in Game 2 of the WCF last night:
The Suns have now won nine consecutive playoff games. They could conceivably go 6-6 the rest of the way and bring the Valley of the Sun its first NBA championship. If that happens, the man I’ll be happiest for is Valley broadcast legend Al McCoy. The 88 year-old has been the Voice of the Suns since Day One in 1968 and he still does their radio broadcasts.
The film noir classic Key Largo played on the TCM the other night. A few notes:
–Directed by John Huston immediately after he’d directed the same lead actor in The Treasure of the Sierra Madre (he’d also directed Bogey in The Maltese Falcon), this film features three Hollywood heavyweights in front of the camera: Lionel Barrymore, Humphrey Bogart and Edward G. Robinson. All-timers, each of them.
–I did not include Lauren Bacall in that list. She’s a classic beauty of Hollywood’s golden age, but I’m not sure she belongs in the same acting class as those three. Oh my God, am I sexist?
–Can we not make the argument that Frank McCloud (Bogey) was only headed to Key Largo to see if his dead war buddy’s widow (Bacall) was as much of a smokeshow as she’d probably looked to be in the photos his buddy had shown him? Oh my God, am I sexist? Seriously, though, Key Largo really isn’t on the way to anything—besides Key West—and as Frank himself tells Nora (Bacall), he’d never worked in the fishing industry.
–Johnny Rocco, what a great gangster name. I have grandparents whose last names were DiDonato, Muggeo and Mundo. And here I get stuck with this WASPy surname. I coulda been someone in the Syndicate. Running counterfeit bills up from Havana. I blame my parents.
–Rocco’s stooges in this film are terrific. Also, the first time we see Rocco he’s sitting naked in a tub and it’s almost too revealing. Sure, we get a topless Edward G. Robinson while Lauren Bacall never does a single costume change. Oh my God, am I sexist?
–The soft-than-soft rock tune “Key Largo,” by Bertie Higgins, from 1982, makes a few references that do not align with the film. First, he makes references to Casablanca (“Here’s lookin’ at you, kid” and “play it again,”), which Bacall did not appear in (though the two did appear in To Have And Have Not, which is eerily similar in plot). Second, part of the chorus is “sailing away to Key Largo.” Except that they never do in the film. Bogey sails away from Key Largo, his life at risk. Finally, they really never “had it all” in the film. In fact, Huston denies fans the sappy reunion hug at the end.
–The film, except perhaps for the opening minute, was shot entirely in Burbank. The studio wouldn’t front Huston the money to film on location, as he just had with Sierra Madre, even though that film had been a hit. In both films, by the way, a supporting actor/actress won an Oscar. Here it’s Claire Trevor as the mobster’s mol.
–Robinson, one of the greatest and most iconic of all the character actors Hollywood ever produced, was never even nominated for an Oscar. That’s unbelievable, one of the great travesties of Oscar-dom. His character was reenacted time and again by Bugs Bunny. We were all watching Edward G. Robinson impersonations before most of us knew who he was.
–If you’re keeping score, Bogey starred in two classic films where he pilots a small boat. This and The African Queen (with Katharine Hepburn).
A few figures that should inform or alarm you, concerning how the American southwest, particularly the metropolitan Phoenix area, is hurtling toward its own Big Short moment:
–Home prices in the Valley’s nicer zip codes have jumped 30 to 40% in the past year (the pandemic definitely has played a role, as people who can work remotely are choosing to relocate here… looks around innocently, whistles).
–Phoenix has received about 1.2 inches of rainfall thus far in 2021, with the year nearly half over. The average annual precipitation is about nine inches.
–Lake Mead, the large man-made lake that provides drinking water to two of the fastest growing metropolises in the U.S., Las Vegas and Phoenix, is at its lowest water level since it was constructed in the 1930s.
–Before summer even officially began on Monday, Phoenix had already seen the most consecutive days over 115 degrees in its history.
Skyrocketing home prices, historic drought and sizzling temperatures, and a vanishing water supply. What could possibly go wrong? Go, Suns!
I’ll see you in Alaska.
Future first-ballot Hall of Famer Max Scherzer was stop-and-frisked three separate times last night in his outing against the Phillies (Max won, both the game and the challenges). We sympathize with baseball, which is in the midst of its own drought (scoring), its worst since 1968. And pitchers have more sneaky substances at their disposal than ever (as do insurrectionists).
But watching pitchers undress on the mound gives us queasy feelings about Charlie Brown being taken yard. We cannot see this farce lasting all that long. Cheating pitchers hurts baseball’s offense, but treating aces as if they’re black teen drivers going 27 mph through a school zone (Oh my God, am I sexist?) is a worse look.
…took it on the chin last night as Montreal blanked Vegas. He’s now 20-9 with a bankroll of $1,365. Still up, but for someone hitting on more than 2 of every 3 picks, not rolling in as much cash as he’d probably like. We’ll await today’s pick.
UPDATE: The Kid wants Germany minus-500 versus Hungary in Euro 2020. And he’s putting $1,000 down. So he can win $200 or lose $1,000. Some would say he’s on TILT. We’ll see.
This had to be the most impactful no-touchdown contest since LSU 9, Alabama 6 back in 2011. The Supreme Court completely shut out the NCAA in its battle to maintain a waiver against anti-trust practices in order to keep an artificial ceiling on player compensation. Then Brett Kavanaugh—yes, that dude—wrote a concurring opinion in which he concluded, “The NCAA is not above the law.”
Only Trump-era Republicans are.
Anyway, college football has already created unrestricted free agency with the transfer portal. Here comes bidding ways. You’ll still watch on Saturdays. So will I. Might as well face it/We’re addicted to love.
Above there, that’s Whizzer White, who had one of the more impressive lives you’ll ever see: played three sports, including football, at the University of Colorado and later became a Supreme Court justice. We think he would’ve concurred with the majority opinion.
Las Vegas Raider defensive end Carl Nassib posted on Instagram that he is gay. Very matter-of-factly. I’d say “nonchalantly” but that words sounds rather French, which sounds rather, well, you know. Anyway, Nassib becomes the first publicly acknowledged ACTIVE (not “actively,” ESPN) gay player in NFL history. The five-year vet played at Penn State, where he led the nation in sacks his final season.
Sincerely, though, this was a very brave thing for Nassib to do. He’s just signed a three-year deal, so he has security, but he’ll never be an anonymous NFL player again. For better and for worse, alas. But hopefully the next pro athlete(s) to announce such will be able to do so with less fanfare.
If you bought Bitcoin one year ago and never touched it, I have wonderful news for you: your investment is up more than 200%.
If you bought Bitcoin last February, we have some bad news for you: your investment has been halved.
Now China is cracking down on Bitcoin mining. The name-brand cryptocurrency fell below $30,000 for the first time since January this morning. It’s way too early (for us, at least) to know who’s right here, the old guard (it’s the greatest Ponzi scheme ever invented) or the young lions (dude, it’s the future). We’re just happy that we don’t own any crypto-related stocks right now.
And we feel that the arguments made by the likes of Michael Burry, Paul Krugman and even Bill Maher the past six weeks (which we’ve featured here) are more compelling than those by renegades who seem to be whistling past the graveyard this morning. They all sound like the dude above. Or like a MyPillow ad. At the end of the day it sounds as if the best thing about Bitcoin is believing in Bitcoin. It’s kinda like… a cult. But then, so was Christianity at one point. It all depends on how many people are going to go all in with the virgin birth thing and the resurrection thing. If enough people believe, you can have a Vatican City or a Bitcoin at $500,000, I guess.
Time will tell.
This is the best argument for “Defund the Police” you’ll see today. Do you really need five squad cars to play follow-the-leader on a low-speed chase into a dead end?
If you watched NBC’s coverage of the U.S. Track & Field Team Trials from sunny and hot Eugene, you saw them do a nice feature on men’s 800 runner Donovan Brazier. They went fishing with him to a stream in Tillamook, Oregon, and played up the fact that the 2019 world champion and American record-holder from Grand Rapids, Mich., was the surest lock for Tokyo at least in last night’s hour of TV.
Guess what happened? Brazier did not win the 800. In fact, he came in last. You still gotta run the race.
Brazier’s loss may not help the U.S. send its best team to Tokyo, but it’s what makes the Trials such compelling TV. Four years of training can blow up in less than 2 minutes (or less for shorter races/events) with one poor performance. And for track athletes, shining at the Olympics is how you go from a mid-range level earner to a major earner. Brazier was poised for a big pay day. Now he’s just another millennial with nothing to do this summer.
Perusing the first eight NBA players to commit to Team USA for men’s hoops and this jumps out at me: at least six of the eight have a 54-point game or better. Five of them have scored at least 60 points in a game and one (Devin Booker) has scored at least 70.
And none of them are named Stephen Curry or LeBron James, neither of whom will play.
The other two are Draymond Green (an excellent passer for a power forward) and Bam Adebayo, who probably had to sign a waiver promising not to shoot unless off an offensive rebound or alley oop. I doubt there’s ever been an Olympic squad with five players who have 60-points-or-better games on their resume. One or three, perhaps, but five?
Note: if the Suns go all the way to the NBA Finals and it goes seven games, Booker’s last NBA game would end one day before the Opening Ceremony. Would he still travel to Tokyo? Remains to be seen. They’d obviously be fine without him during round-robin play, so he could take a few days off and still head over there. What a summer that would be, eh?
I don’t know how many of us will wind up reading the story, but don’t blame the headline writer at The New York Times. His hed: “When An Eel Climbs A Ramp To Eat Squid From A Clamp, That’s A Moray.”
Well done. No splash. Frame this. And this is why SEO optimization needs to disappear from our lives. Give us creativity and fun over most-searched terms 9 days out of every 7, please.
… is back on the Win track with Brazil’s defeat of Peru. So he’s now at 20-8 and $1,610. We’ll wait for today’s wager as he is returning from visiting his pops on Father’s Day (a day of regret and sorrow for his dad… I’ll wager).
Tonight The Kid returns to the ice, where he likes VEGAS -245 over Montreal. That’s losing $245, winning $100. You’re right, the Kid never takes the dog on the money line.