by John Walters

“I know what you’re thinking: Is he turning 85 or is he turning 86 today? Well, in all the excitement, I kind of forgot myself.  You gotta ask yourself, Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya’, punk?

Starting Five

1. The Amazing Adventures of Cavaliers and Klay

Game 7 was terrific, but Game 6 between Golden State and OKC was the game for the ages. Defending champs, on the road, down 9 to begin the fourth quarter, and still trailing by seven with under six minutes to go, and they pulled it out. Klay Thompson‘s playoff career-high 41-point game, in which he stroked a playoff-record 11 threes, was a heroic effort.

I don’t know why OKC stopped playing Steven Adams in the final six minutes last night. No, he doesn’t shoot threes, but he gave the Dubs fits all series.

In Games 6 and 7, Golden State shot 38 of 82 (46%) from beyond the arc. In those same two games, OCK shot 10 of 50 (20%). The only team this postseason to hit more threes than Golden State per game? Cleveland. Gonna be a massive NBA Finals.

2. Manbaby

I think Jon Stewart nailed it here on Trump (thank you, Jacob). But worse, he nailed it on the America that is voting for him. Trump is playing this election exactly like Richard Hatch did the first season of Survivor. Be the bombastic asshole that folks cannot stop watching, then reign it in near the end to give your character some pathos and perhaps win over those who were fighting their inner, “But he’s an asshole, I can’t vote for him” voice.

Also, Stewart is also right that while it’s not the public’s fault for being hoodwinked by this P.T. Barnum of politics, it is completely the media’s for failing to repeatedly question Trump. Simply questioning his claims, insults, etc., is not enough. You have to keep questioning him (on the vets, on the Wall, on John Miller) until he provides a satisfactory answer, which he has yet to do.

This is former Met John Milner, who DID exist (he passed away from cancer in 2000

For example: “Mr. Trump, if John Miller truly exists, how come it is two weeks since that story has broken and no John Miller has surfaced? How come there is no birth certificate? Where are his personnel records?” And you don’t let up until he finally admits that it was him, and then you leave it to the voters to decide whether this is, as Trump once said of the USFL, “Small potatoes.”

3. Harambe

I’m sure thousands or even millions of moms watched the video of the boy in the gorilla compound and thought, That poor boy. I thought, That poor gorilla. You’re stuck in an enclosure your entire life, someone invades it, you are a primate doing what primates do (part of which is being an herbivore, not a carnivore) and so then someone shoots you dead for it.

Was the boy at risk? Certainly. I’m not upset with the Cincinnati Zoo, and I thought its director, Thane Maynard, handled himself like a champ at yesterday’s press conference (here’s a terrific profile of Maynard from three years ago in Cincinnati Magazine) When someone asked him whose fault it was, he said, “I’m not in the finger-pointing business. That’s what pundits and politicians do.”

Maynard

Well, as a pundit, let me: the boy’s parent or parents cost that silverback gorilla his life. I wonder if they even care. And now I wonder if they’ll sue. The reporters who kept trying to make Maynard feel guilty, I wish I could’ve been there to smack them down. It’s a zoo. You have to give people visual access to the animals. And you have children there, so you can’t make all the walls 5-feet high. Adults are supposed to know better than to climb in an animal cage; and children who don’t yet know better should have a parent holding their hand or watching them. Damn.

Also, all the people who were screaming during this episode probably cost the gorilla its life. I get that it’s a bizarre scene. But if people weren’t either screaming or rushing to videotape this, if people had an iota of common sense, especially about how to act in nature, maybe the gorilla doesn’t get agitated, maybe a zoo keeper can enter the compound without any loss of life. (I’m really not a fan of people, especially dumb Americans, if you haven’t figured that out already).

4. Whither Jason?

It’s Always Sunny In The City You’re Leaving Philadelphia For….

There’s a major sports media shakeup taking place, and one place I’d normally to go to read about it is The Big Lead. But it seems as if TBL has been scooped, which is odd considering the scoop pertains to its founder and editor-in-chief, Jason Mcintyre. Awful Announcing reported last week that JM is to appear on a Hot Take Fest, Speak For Yourself, with Colin Cowherd and Jason Whitlock for Fox Sports 1 beginning June 13. That’s a fortnight away but I still haven’t read a peep about it from TBL (or did I miss it?).

Wilbon: Reporter –> columnist –> TV guy –> master of All the Takes.
That’s the career progression writers dream about (but won’t admit)

— Jason McIntyre (@jasonrmcintyre) May 24, 2016

Anyway, happy for Jason. A little surprised FS1 didn’t offer it to Clay “I’m Not Your Bromani” Travis, but who knows, maybe he turned them down. Either way, I assume JM will have to pull a Vincent Chase and move to L.A. and I hope if he does that he realizes it’s in his best interests, and the site’s, to hand over the reins of his site to one of his staffers who isn’t quite as compromised by being on TV (and working so publicly for FS1) every night at 6 p.m.. We’ll see.

5. Mystery

Jakubek owned two school records at SUNY-Cortland

This is tragic but it also sounds like the exposition of an NCIS episode: Jack Jakubek, a recent graduate of Cortland State U. in New York and a star swimmer on the team, dies during a lifeguard tryout on Cape Cod. Not in the ocean. But in a lake, Pilgrim Lake, in the town of Orleans.

He went missing shortly before 9 a.m. and his body was found in the water 24 minutes later. No explanation yet as to what caused him to expire.

Reserves

9:10:76 (which is also the date of my 10th birthday)

An enthusiastic CONGRATULATIONS to Friend of MH Emma Coburn, who set the American record in the steeplechase on Saturday at the Prefontaine Meet in Eugene. Emma broke the existing record that is held by one her closest, if not her closest, friend, Jenny Simpson. And no one could be happier for her than Jenny.

Was Dave Drunk?

Here’s Dave with ESPN’s Matt Barrie, whom I like (as if that matters), before the Indy 500 on Sunday morning. Anyway, Matt did well here (my legs would have been shaking).

Related: I still don’t know who won the Indy 500. I guess I should check.

Music 101 

Let’s Live For Today

This tune by the American band The Grass Roots, which reached No. 6 in the spring of 1967, is Peak Sixties. Imagine hearing this song on the radio as an 18 year-old who just got his draft notice, trying to decide whether or not to head up and cross the border. Note: the band did not write the song; an English group callee The Rokes had written and recorded it a year earlier with less success.

Remote Patrol

Deskset

NetFlix

I worked in a mid-town Manhattan research department for a very high-profile media outlet, and no one could afford to dress this well

Katherine Hepburn. Spencer Tracy. A company based on NBC, set in 1957, that is thinking of eliminating its distaff research department in favor of a super computer (roughly 40 years before “Google” was on anyone’s lips). But what chance does a super computer designed by an MIT grad have against our Kate?

That cutie patootie on the far left is Dina Merrill. She was supposed to be the next Grace Kelly, but it never quite happened (I still don’t see how she avoided being in a Hitchcock film). Her mother was the heiress to the Post cereals fortune and her dad, I kid you not, was E.F. Hutton. Merrill is still alive today.

by John Walters

A Medium Happy 81st to Miss America 1955 and one-time Cat Woman Lee Meriwether

Starting Five

Briles went 50-15 in his final 5 years at Baylor. He’s a terrific offensive mind, but he’ll never be an HC at the FBS level again

1. Wacko in Waco

Art Briles, 60, is gone. Ken Starr, 69 (So now you’re calling him back), is no longer president. Both are gone following the 13-page Findings of Fact from the Hamilton Report and a meeting of Baylor’s board of trustees. Bully for them.

I attended a Baylor home game in 2004 (to see Adrian Peterson for Oklahoma) at Floyd Casey Stadium and it was a dump. The entire atmosphere was probably the most K-Mart of any Power 5 school game I’d ever attended. In less than 10 years Briles turned that program around 180 degrees. Heisman Trophy winner. A Big 12 conference title and a Fiesta Bowl game. Three straight years of leading the country in scoring offense (2013, ’14 and ’15).

But Briles always seemed liked a red ass whenever he was questioned about Baylor’s scheduling, or its off-field problems, etc. He was still that West Texas coach who felt he didn’t have to answer to anyone. Hell, he’d been a Mike Leach assistant, after all. Well, yesterday the bill collector came.

As for Ken Starr, what a schmuck. He went all Captain Ahab chasing Bill Clinton around a in the late 1990s over a consensual sexual matter. Then he has a chance to help at least half a dozen female students, and he turns a blind eye. Of course it was never about justice for Starr; it was about power.

A quick word about football culture, if I may. I played high school football. I’ve also played on other sports teams and been part of other groups (there was that lute band in the early ’90s that never really took off). Anecdotally, I’ve never heard guys talk more about women as being trophy kills, figuratively, as much as I have in football locker rooms. I should add that I’ve never served in the military (that third nipple kept me out).

Anyway, if you want to make a Mike Wilbon-type assumption that football, more than any other sport, has an atmosphere that is disrespectful to women, I’d go with you there based only on my experiences. I always liked the way Steve Spurrier did it: you touch a woman who doesn’t want to be touched, violently or sexually, you’re gone. No excuses. No mitigating factors. Coaches set the tone.

2. “Is Joe Flacco A Elite Quarterback?”

“Is Stephen Curry Undderrated as a Defender?”

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jnQKeGiPrcY

Call it a dumb or bad question by ESPN’s Michelle Steele (there are currently like 7 people at ESPN named Steele), but it produced the best reaction of the post-game press conference at Oracle following Golden State’s Game 5 win. So in that respect it was the best question. Also, I mean, look at Russell Westbrook’s face here. He’s the Clubber Lang of this series, no doubt, but I foresee a Game 6 triple double for him. Oh, Thunder Road, Thunder Road trip….

3. Capsized

This was one of two boats that capsized carrying people from Libya to Italy this week

Refugees? Migrants? Yes. This boat was one of two that capsized in the Mediterranean this week, both of them overloaded with Libyan refugess. This boat capsized when its passengers spotted a rescue ship and everyone moved to the port side to see it. No word on how many died, but at least dozens did. An estimated 40,000 Libyan refugees have flooded into Italy this year ( <–sentences not to write if you want to persuade Phyllis to visit Italy with you).

4. He Said What?

This item is about Trump/Hillary, but Victoria’s Secret announced this week that it is discontinuing its catalog, which will save it $150 million. Okay, but what about us???

Donald Trump, speaking to a gathering in North Dakota yesterday: “There is one more thing that we have to do to make America wealthy again, and you have to be wealthy in order to be great. I’m sorry to say it…..We’ll build the wall. We’re going to build the wall. Believe me. We’re going to build the wall.”

One of my favorite Twitter follows, CNBC’s Josh Brown, replied, “Just like Jesus.”

In the interest of equal time, let’s also post Jonah Goldberg‘s story in The National Review titled, “All of Hillary Clinton’s Lies Are Premeditated.”  I urge you to read it. I urge me to read it (I have not yet).

Quick Thoughts: I’m beginning to think that Trump will win, for the simple reason that nothing he does sticks to him but that this email fiasco will stick to Hillary. One of Trump’s greatest strengths is that he is impervious to the “gotcha!” fact. Part of that is the media’s fault. I mean, Jimmy Kimmel had him on the sofa and should have asked him, “I want you to tell me to my face that you were not John Miller.” And he shouldn’t have relented until Trump did that (it would have been good TV, too). But he didn’t. Donald is a huckster, but we all know that. Hillary is Tracy Flick; she wants us all to think she’s perfect, and she’s not. And she’ll pay a dearer price for that.

Also, some people think that because so many folks hate both candidates that voter turnout in November won’t be “YUUUUUGE.” I think exactly the opposite. People who usually don’t vote will get off their asses to vote for Trump, and many others will do so to vote not for Trump. As former Secretary of Labor Robert Reich wrote two days ago, and  I am paraphrasing, “Not voting on election day is tantamount to voting for Trump.”

I keep hearing that Trump is a Fascist. I don’t agree. I think he’s simply an opportunist. A narcissist. And a brilliant player of the game. But he’s not a Fascist: he just understands that an undercurrent of Fascism has been developing here ever since 9/11 and he’s ready to surf that wave to 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue. But let’s not fool ourselves: this is, and has always only ever been, about his ego (and sure, you can say the same about Hillary, but at least she did the crappy Class Secretary/Sergeant at Arms types job, paid her dues).

5. Where In The World?

Hint: You are looking at the highest point in this country….

In case you forgot, this was our previous WITW:

That’s the Genghis Khan Equestrian Statue on the banks of the Tuul River in Mongolia. A nice weekend trip. Now THIS was a Khan who truly had a wrath….

Music 101

Head Over Heels

“I’ll take two-man British groups from 1984-85 for $200, Alex.” You could make an actual category out of this, what with Wham! and Eurythmics (I know) and this band, Tears For Fears. This song packed at No. 3 in the U.S. in the spring of ’85.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZZyGDiUnta4

But if you think I’m going to squander the opportunity to put both songs with this title fro this era here, No way, Joaquin (wait, that’s not how it goes). Here’s the Go Go’s song of the same name from 1984. This peaked at No. 11 (related: Talk Show is an underrated album).

Remote Patrol

Memorial Day Weekend

It’s the best TV sports weekend of the year that does not include college football or March Madness. And it is definitely tops in terms of variety. Enjoy!

Saturday

UEFA Champions League Final: Atletico Madrid vs. Real Madrid

Fox 2:30 p.m.

A rematch of the 2014 classic, from Milan.

Game 6: Warriors at Thunder

TNT 9 p.m.

Will the refs curry favor on Steph?

Sunday

Monaco Grand Prix

8 a.m. NBC

Max Verstappen…..

Indianapolis 500

Noon ABC

The 100th running….

French Open

NBC Noon

Round of 16 from Roland Garros

Game 6: Cavs at Raptors

8:30 p.m. ESPN

Drink every time Mark Jackson says, “Momma, there goes that man.” Cuz why put a brick through your TV set? Also, Susie B. is MIA for more than a week now. You’re gonna have to develop thicker skin if you want to be in the sports-opining biz, kiddo.

Monday

French Open

Noon NBC

Round of 16

NCAA Lacrosse National Championship

ESPN 1 p.m.

Sticks and stones

NHL Stanley Cup Final: Sharks vs. Penguins

NBC 8 p.m.

Sharks on ice!

by John Walters

A Medium Happy 50th to Helena Bonham-Carter. Once a promising actress, she came down with an acute case of Tim Burtonitis, the same disease that threw Johnny Depp’s career off-track….

Starting Five

Frye, on his 4th team in the past 3 seasons, is suddenly the Cavs’ 6th man

Lake Effects

In Games 3 & 4 in Toronto, along the shores of Lake Ontario, Raptors All-Star Kyle Lowry scored 20 & 35 points. Last night in Game 5 in Cleveland, along the shores of Lake Erie, he scored 13. He had 8 and 10 points in Games 1 and 2 near Lake Erie.

The story, though, is a devastating defense by Cleveland, Peak LeBron, Peak Channing Frye (shooting .571 from beyond arc, 12-21), and an apparently warging Richard Jefferson, who is playing as if he’s 28 again.

Lowry has been like Jerry’s two-faced girlfriend, Gwen, this series

Cavs win, 116-78, That’s the EIGHTH game this playoffs decided by 30 or more points, which is an NBA record. No wonder you’re flipping over to “HBO and Relax,: ( <–I stole that from A.J.)

Finally, a Cleveland-OKC NBA Finals will give us Quicken Loans Arena versus Chesapeake Energy Arena. A company that has been investigated by the Dept. of Justice for corruption in home loans versus a company that made its fortune off fracking. #Murica

2. Jackie, OH!

This is probably my favorite vantage point for any baseball photo

Very quietly, what with all the hysteria over the Cubbies (and those other Sox), (and also, the utter lack of hysteria over baseball unless Jose Bautista is taking one to the jaw) the Red Sox have climbed into first place in the A.L. East (29-17) and have the best record in the A.L.. Even more quietly, outfielder Jackie Bradley, Jr. (not a Martin Short character) has gotten more than halfway to Joe DiMaggio’s untouchable mark of hitting safely in 56 straight games.

Bradley, who bats 6th, went 2-4 in a 10-3 win against the Rockies last night to hit safely in his 29th consecutive game. He is batting .350, which leads the A.L.  Teammate Xander Bogaerts hit a home run to bring his own hitting streak to 18 games. He’s hitting .349, second-best in the A.L.

3. That’s Mad, Max

Verstappen is Dutch and means “not stopping.” You may wanna check that

How fast were you allowed to drive when you were 18 years old? On May 15 Dutch driver Max Verstappen won the Formula One Spanish Grand Prix, becoming the youngest person ever to win an F/1 race. That’s a pretty big deal in Europe, where I’ll be moving in December….

4. Death at the Show

The question becomes, How do they turn this into a story arc on Vinyl next season?

Irving Plaza, a block off Union Square in NYC, has always been a great venue for a smaller show. But last night it was a shooting gallery as shots rang out just before rapper T.I. (“Live Your Life”) took the stage. Three people were hit and another person was killed. Watch the video in the link and the last thing you hear is someone say, “Get the f**k outta here,” which is probably the last thing a lot of people say before a bullet hits them.

According to witnesses, (read this), a fight broke out backstage and the shots may have come from the green room. That certainly narrows the list of suspects. Of course, the crowd was not, say, a Dierks Bentley crowd and there’s very little chance ISIS was behind this, so nothing to worry about, America. You know, it happened to “them.”

5. ConGrads

This is Alex Idrache. He was born in Haiti but last week graduated from the United States Military Academy. He’s now off to flight school. This is the American Dream in one photo. Kudos to Staff Sergeant Vito Bryant, who snapped the photo.

Benjamin did it all at Brophy Prep in Phoenix

Closer to (my) home, this is Josh Benjamin who, like me, graduated from Brophy College Prep in Phoenix (it’s just that he did it last week and I did it last century). Benjamin was the Jesuit school’s valedictorian and homecoming king (the first African-American valedictorian, it is believed, but not the first such homecoming king; we voted my teammate and classmate Dan Simmons HK in 1983).

Love this kid. And I think he’s from the East Valley. Respect that commute, Josh; I did it, too.

I’ve not met Josh, but this fantastic story by Richard Obert of the Arizona Republic mentions that he played football, ran track, speaks Spanish and did plenty of volunteer work while also graduating with a 4.4. GPA. He’s off to Harvard (Josh spurned Notre Dame; other than that, he seems like a good kid) where he plans to major in math. Michael Wilbon should really try and meet him.

(I’m not supposed to say that Josh looks as if he could be Jaylon Smith’s younger brother, right? That would be wrong?)

Reserves

Little Trump at the National Spelling Bee. From Jimmy Kimmel Live last night.

Music 101

Fly Away

It’s also Lenny Kravitz‘s birthday. As the son of the woman who played George Jefferson’s neighbor and nemesis on The Jeffersons turns 52, we remember this hit from 1998 that soared to No. 2 in the UK and No. 12 here.

Remote Patrol

Game 5: OKC at Golden State

TNT 9 p.m.

Steven Adams will kneed to (the groin) play his best

This should be good. If the Thunder put the dagger into the Dubs at home, ending the greatest non-championship season in NBA history, that’ll be memorable. Don’t care what anyone says, Stephen Curry is still not 100%. But even if he was, I’m not sure these Thunder are losing. Russell Westbrook is in Hall of Fame form (and he IS a future Hall of Famer).

by John Walters

A Medium Happy 47th to Anna Heche, who is the answer to two questions: 1) Is the hot worth the crazy? and 2) What if Gwyneth Paltrow and Phoebe from “Friends” had a baby?

Starting Five

Westbrook is leaving Golden State and Curry behind

Russell Athletic

The line last night for Russell Westbrook: 36 rebounds, 11 rebounds, 11 assists. The last time a player had a triple double in the playoffs and scored at least 35 points was 1969, Jerry West of the Los Angeles Lakers. That’s good company, Russ. You’ve been the best player of the postseason.

Every All-Star Game, West got to wear his name on the back and front of his jersey

I still think Stephen Curry is not close to 100%. But give the Thunder credit. They have the will to win and a second straight blowout of the world champions by more than 20 points shows that.

2. So AA’s Don’t Like AA?

“If Draymond scores 3 points and commits 5 turnovers in 7 minutes while the Warriors are outscored by 9 points, what is his VO2 Max? Wait, lemme try that again the pages were stuck together”

In a cover piece for The Undefeated yesterday, Michael Wilbon asserted, and I quote, “Conclusion: Advanced analytics and black folks hardly ever mix.”

Wilbon quotes perhaps 6 people in his story in coming to that conclusion. So I know at least one black folk who doesn’t get advanced analytics all that much.

It’s a day later and there has been almost no outcry to Wilbon’s assertion. But what if I, or another white writer, had written that? With that little research? Hmmm. I tweeted that I was working on my story on how white folks never seem to rob convenience stores (an assertion I can probably make with stronger analytical proof) and that temporarily set Twitter on fire.

Look, there are things a black writer is able to write on the black experience that a white writer just cannot know. Got it. But there is nothing that Wilbon brought to this story because he was black that a white writer could not. Make a lazy assertion. Take to a few people. Pronounce assertion true. The only difference here is that because he’s black, this isn’t the first topic on ATH, PTI and BET.

3. Harvey Danger

With last night’s 7-4 loss at Washington, Matt Harvey of the Mets is now 3-7 with a 6.08 ERA. The Dark Knight has allowed at least 5 runs in each of his last three starts, all losses. and Citi Field fans are in DefCon 3 panic mode. Has anyone yet written an 8,000-word think piece on how Terry Collins’ decision to allow him to pitch the 9th against K.C. last October ruined his career? No?

4. Donald Trump and the Case of The Grudgingly Donated $1 Million

There was a debate last winter. Donald Trump opted out. Instead, he decided to hold a fundraiser for military veterans. Great p.r. move for a man who avoided military service four different times. Trump boasted that he’d raised “$6 million for vets.”

Then the media, “terrible people,” “nasty,” were rude enough to inquire about the details of his largesse. That’s when things got messy. You should read this story by the Washington Post. It turns out that Trump donated $1 million only last week, which happened to coincide with the media ramping up efforts to exact details from him about the donations to vets. When a reporter asked if one had a causal effect on the other, Trump replied, ““You know, you’re a nasty guy. You’re really a nasty guy.”

Donald Trump is calling someone else a nasty guy. Wow. On top of everything else, he’s thin-skinned and shows an utter lack of self-awareness. People actually want him to be this nation’s leader?

Read this story, too, by RedState.com, which I would assume is a conservative publication.

And read this story, too.

5. SNL Wrap

McKinnon is SNL’s MVP

Elizabeth Banks: “It’s just, no matter what I do, I can’t win.”

Kenan Thompson: “That’s the blackest thing you’ve said all day.”

Probably the best exchange in a skit on SNL all season, from “Black Jeopardy.”

SNL wrapped its 41st season on Saturday, and Rolling Stone listed and ranked its Top 10 skits. No disagreement here, though I think Kate McKinnon’s Olga Povlatsky deserved a spot in the Top 10. Also, McKinnon was the cast MVP this season, while Taran Killam won the “Where Did He Go?” award. Most Improved (Not Ready For Prime Time) Player: Colin Jost.

Music 101

Reach Out (I’ll Be There)

As a huge fan of music, I can’t be happier that I was born in 1966, the best year in the history of popular music. This Motown tune by The Four Tops held the No. 1 spot on the Billboard chart for two weeks in October of ’66. Levi Stubbs just growled those lyrics, man. He bashed that door down.

Remote Patrol

Jimmy Kimmel Live

ABC 11:35 p.m.

Donald Trump is the guest. Will Guillermo be deported? You could do the entire hour with Mean Tweets, both by Trump and/or directed at him. Kimmel has never made a secret about the fact that his childhood idol was David Letterman. I gotta be thinking he’s having many “What Would Dave Do?” thoughts today.

by John Walters (sorry, I’m back)

Bob Dylan turns 75 today, but I’m not about to suggest that he’s knockin’ on heaven’s door….

Starting Five

If only he had some sort of wedge to lock the door from the outside, as Khaleesi had

1.  Hold The Door!

By now you know that our beloved Rim Protector of Winterfell, Hodor, died. A few thoughts:

1. Since Hodor was his name since the very first episode, Bran was always going to make the mistake of allowing the Night’s King to touch him. It wasn’t as if this was an accident. So why did the Three-Eyed Raven, who can warg, allow him to do this while he was asleep?
2. Second GoT episode in a row that ended with an incredible death scene that involved a door being jammed or locked. If only Hodor had a wooden plank to hold across the door as Daenerys had.
3. The actor who portrayed young Hodor, i.e. Wyllis (Sam Coleman) did an outstanding job with his seizure scene, no?
   

   Are there Single Scene Emmys? Should there be, because Coleman deserves one.

4. So you have Meera pulling Bran on a sled through a blizzard as Hodor’s death gives them, what, a five-minute head start? At the moment, it still doesn’t look too good for them.
5. You have to love actor Kristian Nairn, a.k.a Hodor. For five-plus seasons he had a prominent role on a show in which he only had to know one word for all of his lines. It must have been fun for him getting the scripts each week.

2. Everybody Loves Draymond*

Common basketball move

*The judges will also accept, “Ain’t That a Kick in the Pants?”

If intentionally kicking an opposing player in the groin merits a suspension, then Draymond Green deserved a suspension. Simple as that. I’ve seen some folks on Twitter suggest other punishments for Green because they don’t want “the series to be ruined” by having him miss Game 4, but this is a common logical flaw: the NBA wouldn’t have “ruined” the series, Green would have by choosing to do something that is illegal.

It’s not the guy who enforces the law who creates the outcome, it’s the guy who breaks it. Remember that, SEC fans.

Anyway, NBA VP of Ops KiKi Vandeweghe, a former player, was on SVP last night and suggested that part of the reason that Green was not suspended is that he tends to flail a lot. Well, KiKi, that’s not an excuse. If I tend to shoot off my gun in the backyard in crazy directions, that doesn’t excuse me when a random shot I fired hits an innocent victim.

3. Mudder of God

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_ZC9MedUFto

It was three days ago, but we’re catching up here and my,  what a terrific Preakness. No? In the slop at Pimlico, Kentucky Derby winner Nyquist took off like a bat out of hell. Exaggerator, who had finished second at the Derby, was as much as 11 or 13 lengths behind early. But watch Exaggerator slowly reel Nyquist. And then on the homestretch, watch as Nyquist’s jockey panics and pulls out from the rail to try and go outside of E, wasting valuable time and energy. I think Tyronn Lue was riding Nyquist. Outstanding race.

4. The Mountain Wins Again

You’re not gonna need that return flight ticket

Four people died attempting to summit (and just as difficult to return from) Mount Everest over the weekend. Personally, I LOVE that there is a mountain such as Everest that remains such a treacherous goal for men and women. I love that there are people who would risk their lives for the glory of doing it. And I love that Nepal isn’t governed by a bunch of sissy Marys who would outlaw climbing it. I love that they don’t want to protect us from ourselves.

Climb every mountain, said Maria Von Trapp. Especially if you’re trying to escape the Nazis. Or even just escape banality. You may pay the highest price. But so what? At least you lived.

5. O, Caput-in, My Caput-in*

*The judges acknowledge your use of Latin (“caput” is “head”)

The season finale of Saturday Night Live, hosted by former cast member Frank Armisen, had a vintage feel. There was a cold open that segued into a dance sequence that took our characters off stage and beyond the fourth wall, something that Steve Martin and Gilda Radner once did decades ago. There was a final skit, the Harkin Brothers, that didn’t go for a laugh as much as it did a vibe. And there was Bass-o-Matic level gross-out humor with “Farewell, Mr. Bunting,” an instant classic.

By the way, “Weekend Update” co-anchor Colin Jost had a very strong second half of the season. Last week’s joke, at the end of Jay Pharaoh’s bit about the rapper intervention, when he asked, “Were there any rappers there that I like?” was perfect. And this past weekend he ended with a joke that he and Michael Che said was too racy for them to use at the time: “Jared Fogel from Subway was sentenced to 15 years. The good news for his cellmate is that Jared is used to eating the same thing every day for 15 years.”

Music 101

Girl From The North Country

Bob Dylan, who turns 75 today, wrote this song in 1963, when he has just 22 years old. How do people have this much talent so young (or maybe it’s just the opposite? This is the age at which people are their most creative?) ? He re-recorded this song of love and loss six years later, with the legendary Johnny Cash, for his 1969 Nashville Sounds album.

And just as a little bonus here, this is Dylan appearing on TV at the age of 22 with “A Man of Constant Sorrow.” Finally, here’s a good read on Dylan, his interview with Ed Bradley of “60 Minutes” in 2004. It was his first TV interview in 20 years.

Remote Patrol

The Night Manager

10 p.m. AMC

Dickie Roper seems too smart and savvy to not realize who his Judas is

If you’ve stuck with it this far, you know that tonight is the six-episode miniseries’ finale and that Jonathan Pine/Andrew Birch is right back where he started: at a swanky hotel in Cairo. Sure, Warriors at Thunder (9 p.m., TNT) Game 4 should be a kick in the pants as well.