by John Walters

Starting Five

1. Linsanity II: Outer-Borough Boogaloo

In an “I can’t quit you, Pablo Torre” moment, Jeremy Lin will join his fellow Harvard alum  in Brooklyn (for as long as PT, I remains there) come autumn. At $12 million per year, Lin should be able to afford a one-bedroom in Park Slope, but Williamsburg is entirely out of the question. Still, for a dude who once slept on a friend’s couch while burning through 10-day deals with the Knicks, this is a step up.

2. Sully His Fame?

I like the title “Sully” for that new film about the water landing on the Hudson for the double entendre (no one ever mentions single entendres): it refers to both Captain Chesley Sullenberger and what might have happened to his reputation (my suggested title, “Chesley, Lately”) was not accepted.

By the way, Tom Hanks has now starred in Apollo 13, Captain Phillips and this. He’s your go-to lead for imperiled but not actually doomed giant craft (and I didn’t even mention when he captained that shrimp boat in Forrest Gump).

3. L.A.’s Newest Swank Drink: Mozgov Cocktail

Four years and a reported $64 million from the Lakers to the 7’1″ center Timofey Mozgov, late of the Cavs, from Russia. You have to imagine Kobe Bryant is reconsidering this entire retirement deal. He could at least score 20 per night playing once a week and collect no less than $10 million per to do so.

I’m hoping to get Jack Nicholson to do a breakdown of Mozgov’s low-post skills versus that of The Chief in One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest.

4. The Empire Strikes Back

U.S. government officials say that 250 ISIS militants were killed by U.S. drone strikes on Wednesday. The drones targeted a convoy of vehicles that were either streaming out of Fallujah or Bonnaroo. Not sure.

For the “Well, actually” guy, the strikes were NOT done in retaliation for the attack at the airport in Istanbul. It was just a moment of opportunity.

5. Holidays In Hell (but not Helsinki)

The site for National Geographic suggests 10 places to visit where you probably will have a difficult time persuading your spouse or any loved one to join you: destinations such as Iran, Kosovo, Nicaragua and Tunisia. Still, the price is right and the pictures are pretty. And they’re all better options than Syria or North Korea.

Music 101

Roam

It’s Fred Schneider’s 65th birthday, and to salute the beloved and bizarre B-52’s frontman, here’s a tune from the band’s 1989 comeback album, Cosmic Thing. This song, the 4th single from that album, climbed to No. 3 on the Billboard charts. What a wonderful time, when four songs from one B-52’s release could be embraced by the public.

Remote Patrol

Euro 2016 Quarters

Belgium vs. Wales

3 p.m. ESPN2

In which FIFA’s top-ranked side, the city of Belgium, takes on Medium Happy’s favorite man-bunned striker, Gareth Bale (you can’t spell this writer’s last name without “Wales,” and the letters even appear in the same order).