by John Walters

Starting Five

Vampire Weekend

No, that’s not a mirage: Bob Dylan. The Rolling Stones. Paul McCartney. The Who. Roger Waters. Neil Young. All in one place (Indio, California) for three days in early October. “Desert Trip.” Tickets priced anywhere from $199 for a single-day GA pass to $1,699 for three days and a closer seat or spot in the pit.

We can make fun and snark (“Oldchella” or “Desert Trip and Fall: the Broken Hip Tour” or “The Grateful Undead”) but if you were a classical music fan and had the chance to see Bach, Beethoven and Mozart play one last gig in the same concert hall, how much would that be worth to you?

Suggested songs based on lyrics:

“Old Man”….Neil Young

“Mother’s Little Helper” ….Stones (“What a drag it is getting old”)

“Long Live Rock” …..The Who (“Long live rock/Be it dead or alive”)

“The Times They Are a-Changin'”…..Dylan

“Comfortably Numb”…..Waters (it’s just an incredible song

“The End”…..McCartney (“And in the end/The love you take/Is equal to the love you make”)

Here’s how it came about. And here’s my story in Newsweek. 

Quick Thought: Six bands in a Desert Trip 2 lineup? One rule: Your lead singer can’t be dead (or deaf), so I’m sorry to Queen , Nirvana and the Eagles, but you’re disqualified. Here goes it: Bruce Springsteen, Tom Petty, U2, Pearl Jam, Aerosmith, Radiohead?
Your thoughts, please.

2. “Ted’s Dead, Baby. Ted’s Dead”

Donald Trump won 53% of the vote to Ted Cruz’s 36% in Indiana, and the Senator from Texas dropped out of the race. “We left it all on the field,” said Cruz, properly employing a sports metaphor in the Hoosier State, albeit a bit too late. And, considering the month that we are in, perhaps he should have said, “We got lapped and then I spun out in Turn 3.”

What next for him? Will Cruz go home to Canada, as so many other Americans have threatened to do if Trump wins? I hope not. My hope is that he moves to New Orleans and opens the French Quarter’s most popular new restaurant: Jumbalyin’ Ted Cruz.

3. HamilTony

Speaking of Washington insiders who never made it all the way to the White House, “Hamilton” received 16 Tony nominations yesterday, a record. Lin-Manuel Miranda will soon have more Tonys than anyone in New York City outside of Little Italy. To think you could be nominated for this many awards without your ship hitting an iceberg in Act 2.

4. Charles Keating IV

The Navy SEAL who was killed in Iraq in a clash with ISIS on Tuesday was the scion of a very well-known family in Arizona. Charles Keating IV was the grandson of Charles Keating, the infamous savings and loan financier (who died in 2014 at the age of 90),  A 2004 graduate of Arcadia High School in Phoenix (in the shadow of Camelback Mountain), Keating was a cross-country city champ in the 1600 as a sophomore, junior and senior. He attended Indiana University, where he ran cross-country, but later dropped out in 2006 to join the Navy and become a SEAL. Just a guess here, but considering his home state and the timing of when he left IU, I would not be surprised if he had not been somewhat influenced by the life and death of Pat Tillman. Keating was engaged to be married in November.

5. Hot In Here

Kudos to Jimmy Kimmel for trying, yet again, to do a little good in the world while also being funny about it (“How do you know climate change is real? When the hottest year on record is whatever year you happen to be in.”). This is really good, especially the part when Jimmy parrots Sarah Palin’s “Who am I to question that?” line. “Exactly,” says Kimmel. “Who are you to question that?”

Music 101

Rock and Roll

With yesterday’s “Vampire Weekend” news, I decided to look for the first rock and roll song. And then I found a song that, while it may not fit the definition, is the earliest known use of the term “rock and roll.” And it refers not to sex but to the motion of a boat on the ocean (Or were they being coy way back in 1934? Perhaps.)

These are the Boswell Sisters (Connie, in the middle, was unable to walk, perhaps because of childhood polio, though no one knows for sure; but that’s why they appear seated in the boat) and they were stars of radio in the Depression era. The Andrews Sisters would later model themselves after them. This song appeared in the movie musical “Transatlantic Merry Go-Round.”

Worth noting: many people consider the 1927 song “When The Levee Breaks” by Kansas Joe McCoy to be the progenitor of rock songs. Led Zeppelin would later record songs called “Rock and Roll” and “When The Levee Breaks.”

Remote Patrol

UEFA Champions League Semi-Final

Manchester City at Real Madrid

2:45 p.m. FS1

The second leg of the semi heralds the return of Cristiano Ronaldo. The first leg ended in a 0-0 draw. No one has scored more goals in Champions League play than Ronaldo, who has 93. Which is crazy. Because the first leg ended scoreless, Madrid must win if Man City scores even one goal. Yaya Toure, who is not a lyric from The Grinch Who Stole Christmas, returns for the the English club.