by John Walters
A Medium Happy Birthday to the world’s first peerless prognosticator, Nostradamus (now age 512)
Starting Five
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NKXGA-AU50w
1. Will I Am
Ron Burgundy himself returned to Studio 8-H to kick of Saturday Night Live this weekend. If you have yet to see it, what are you reading me for? Click away.
2. Beasts of the Southern –and Northern Wild
Henry leads the nation in rushing yards per game, and the NCAA is all messed up since they count postseason stats, which means some teams will play as many as 15 games, others as few as 12.
In New York City, punishing running back Derrick Henry of Alabama wins the Heisman Trophy at the end of a television show that was only 90 minutes long (I blacked out for a bit and dreamt that Eddie George was going to star in a Broadway musical).
The toughest priest running back since Priest Holmes.
Meanwhile in St. Paul, our man Jordan Roberts, the beast who’s studying to be a priest, ran all over Linfield’s defense to the tune of 256 yards and 3 TDs as St. Thomas rolled, 38-17, and advanced to the Division III national championship game to face Mt. Union.
Also this weekend, SB Nation handed out the inaugural Piesman Trophy. Congratulations, Ashton Henderson. What’s left after that?
3. Symmetry
Drayman Green has been the Warriors’ glue guy….
We take this brief pause, almost 1/3 of the way through the NBA regular season, to note that the Golden State Warriors are now 24-1 and the Philadelphia 76ers, who are basically importing the Phoenix Suns front office (first, Jerry Colangelo and soon perhaps, Mike D’Antoni) , are 1-24.
How cool is that?
No other NBA team has ever begun a season 24-1 (GSW, as you know, finally lost on Saturday night in Milwaukee, on the back end of a back-to-back on the road). Three teams, however, have started out 24-2, the most recent of them being the 2008-09 Boston Celtics.
Only one NBA team has ever started a season as poorly as these Sixers have done: the 1970-71 Cleveland Cavaliers began that season 1-27. They finished with a record of 15-67 and would draft Austin Carr of Notre Dame the following summer.
Undrafted rookie T.J. McConnell, whose aunt is Suzie McConnell_Seri (legendary hoopster at Penn State), has been a rare unexpected bright spot in a Philly autumn full of blight spots…
By the way, that Cleveland team was coached by Bill Fitch, who would later lead the Bird-era Celtics to their first NBA title of the ’80s. Also of note, that Cavs team had a rookie forward by the name of Larry Mikan. Yes, he was George’s son, and that would be his only season in the NBA.
4. Rule No. 1 (Again)*
Nkemdiche is a force of nature, but not as omnipotet of one as gravity is.
*Loyal readers of Medium Happy — both of you– know that Rule No. 1 is “Gravity always wins.”
On Saturday night Robert Nkemdiche, arguably the most devastating defensive player in next spring’s NFL draft, fell one story off a hotel balcony in Atlanta. That’s one way to celebrate the conclusion of finals week at the University of Mississippi. Nkemdiche, a 6’5″, 293-pound human Zamboni, is an Atlanta native.
Nkemdiche should be okay, although the incidents leading up to his fall are redolent of Josh Shaw’s famed “jump into the pool to save my nephew from drowning.” Nkemdiche apparently broke through a window at the Grand Hyatt Hotel, walked 5 yards, climbed over a wall, and then fell 15 feet. So either Nkemdiche as partying too hard — marijuana was found in the room — or competing in a Spartan Race.
Last May Nkemdiche tweeted the following: “As above so below, who actually made the term ‘gravity’ is that really the term?” To which yours truly, being the acerbic ass that I can be, replied, “Jump from 3rd story, see what happens. Stand on ground, try to jump up to 3rd story. See what happens. So, premise is false.”
I never really thought Robert would field-test my suggestion. Anyway, we can all just look forward to when Nkemdiche explains this incident to coach Harbaugh on one of those ESPN pre-draft specials in the spring, no?
5. Cherries on Top
Josh King helped propel sport’s greatest underdog franchise to another unlikely win, its second in an 8-day span.
On Saturday in the Premier League, AFC Bournemouth took down Manchester United, 2-1. Only seven days earlier the Cherries took down defending Premier League champs Chelsea, 1-0.
According to Forbes, Man U is the world’s 5th wealthiest pro sports franchise, and Chelsea the 31st. They’re two of the three most valuable in the BPL. In the past 11 years, Chelsea (4) and Manchester United (5) have combined to win nine of the 11 championships at the highest level of English football.
Bournemouth, meanwhile, was a lower division team just last year and in 2008 was forced into bankruptcy with debts of some $7 million. The Cherries, whose “stadium” holds 11,000 fans, are now in 14th place (out of 20 clubs), ahead of Chelsea. If they can finish about 18th place, not only will they avoid relegation but they will be party to the BPL’s massive new TV contract at year’s end. If you’re a fan of the little guy, this is the best sports story in quite some time.
Music 101
High Hopes
We failed to give Frank Sinatra‘s 100th birthday its proper due on Saturday, so we’ll begin to make amends today. This simple little song is the embodiment of its theme: it wound up becoming a hit single for Ol’ Blue Eyes, won the Academy Award in 1960 for Best Original Song, and then became the theme for a young, dashing presidential candidate named John F. Kennedy.
Remote Patrol
Adele Live from New York City
NBC 10 p.m.
Dude, you’re getting Adele. So NBC will air two hours of The Voice leading up to one hour of the world’s most popular canary warbling onstage at Radio City Music Hall. The actual show was staged about two weeks ago, right around Thanksgiving. This was her first concert in four years.