Starting Five
Towns paced the Cats with 19 points and 7 boards and made a solid argument for hyphens connecting first names, not surnames
1. Bluebloods Prevail
I don’t know if anyone has coined a term for this phenomenon, but all too often in sports we see it: the team that has a history of greatness finds itself trailing in a game late and yet, almost through sheer force of destiny, prevails. It’s as if everyone watching, both at home and in person, knows who is supposed to win, and so the prophecy fulfills itself. Even the team that is in the midst of pulling off the upset seems like a willing participant in its own demise.
Happened twice last night. Undefeated and No. 1 Kentucky trailed Georgia in Athens by nine points with 9:10 remaining and still by six with 4:55 to play. But then coach John Calipari told his players, “Scared money don’t make money” (he’s right) and the Cats cruised to a 70-62 win, outscoring the Bulldogs 16-2 in the final five minutes.
Frank Mason III is a full foot shorter (5’11”) than Towns, but he, too, had 19 points and 7 boards in KU’s win
At the same time in Lawrence, Kansas, the Jayhawks trailed West Virginia by eight points with 2:02 to play. The Mountaineers even had the ball. So of course, KU forces overtime and then wins.
That’s why they are who they are. UK and KU have a combined 11 national titles in men’s hoops, Georgia and West Virginia have zero.
2. Sir Vivor
If only God had spared one domestic housekeeper –preferably an illegal immigrant–as well
Two men, each living in the American southwest, basically isolated from civilization and not taking advantage of the good woman they have backing them: Phil Miller and James McGill.
What does it say about Will Forte’s new sitcom, Last Man on Earth, that we all find shyster lawyer McGill far more appealing as a human? LMoE has some nice touches, such as the inflatable margarita pool, but whither the conflict? Will it all emanate from the one-note joke that even if you and she are the last two people on Earth that your wife will still nag you?
My favorite moment? When Phil tries to figure out how to use the giant water shed to water Carol’s tomatoes (not a euphemism) and is using duct tape and even a gun and I’m thinking to myself, this is a situation that needs MacGruber!
3. Roasted
Biebs. Roastable? Uh, yeah…
Now that Stephen Colbert has departed and Jon Stewart will soon join him, the best reason for Comedy Central to still exist may be its celebrity roasts. Next up? Justin Bieber, who recently turned 21 and will be singed on March 14th for a telecast that will air on March 30th.
Now, we all know how bad Rolling Stone lists can be (see its recent ranking of SNL cast members), but you may want to click on this link simply to watch all the clips of 18 previous Comedy Central roasts, from Charlie Sheen to Joan Rivers.
4. Thieves & Princes
Curry and Westbrook are both having career seasons…
I don’t know how common or uncommon this is, but the NBA’s top three leaders in Steals are three of its top four scorers. The Steals list looks like this:
Stephen Curry…………2.12
Russell Westbrook…..2.04
James Harden…………1.95
….as is Harden
The Scoring list looks like this:
James Harden……………………………..27.1
Russell Westbrook……………………….26.5
LeBron James……………………………..26.2
Stephen Curry/Anthony Davis………23.9
That doesn’t really help when it comes to narrowing the MVP field. Curiously enough, the Atlanta Hawks, who won last night to move to 48-12 on the season (.800), don’t have a scorer in the league’s Top 25. Paul Millsap is 30th at 16.9 ppg.
5. Things I Didn’t Know… (Cont.)
China’s Civil War made our Civil War, which was happening contemporaneously, seem puny by comparison
Before yesterday I’d never heard of the Taiping Rebellion in China or of Hong Xiuquan, the leader of the rebellion who announced to his followers that he had received visions telling him that he was the younger brother of Jesus.
The rebellion lasted from 1851-1866 and here’s what’ll blow your mind: 20 million Chinese lost their lives. That’s like taking the ENTIRE CURRENT populations of New York City, Los Angeles, Chicago, Houston, Philadelphia and Phoenix and completely exterminating them.
So yeah, 20 million people. By comparison, 620,000 soldiers died in the American Civil War, which took place at the same time. Never knew that. My smart buddy Dan told me about that.
Remote Patrol
Conan in Cuba
TBS 11 p.m.
Not that a six-foot-five carrot-topped comedian would stand out in Havana, but 54 or so years after another Harvard alum (JFK) stared down Castro, Conan O’Brien takes his entire show down to that lovely island south of the Florida Keys for a show. The last time an American late-night talk show host visited Cuba was in 1959 when Jack Paar took The Tonight Show there (statistics provided by Elias Late Night TV Show Bureau).
Dan is your “smart” buddy? You need a friend upgrade!
Let me get this straight – you never HEARD of the Taiping Rebellion or just didn’t know all the details till YESTERDAY? Either way you prove one of my points of the last 4 decades : the so-called “teaching” of HISTORY in America’s public schools over the last 35 years has been pathetic. Just one step above the non-existent financial education. Plus, I guess this means historical fiction was not one of your favorite genres?
Well, look on the bright side – thanks to Swaggy P & susie b, YOU now know that dolphins & groundhogs both threaten & attack humans even when unprovoked! 😉
Where is LeBron on that steals list? Number 4? He gets at least 2 steals in every game I’ve been able to see. And he could have upped his average if he had played the 4th quarters in all those Cav blow-out games the past month (e.g. last night – ahead of the poor Celtics by 42 (FORTY-TWO) in the 3rd quarter).
Also, I was able to see the 2nd half of the Cavs-Rockets game again on NBA-TV’s repeat showing yesterday & not only should Harden have been THROWN OUT of the game after the intentional kick, he was NOT that impressive at all in the 2nd half & OT. Seriously, people think that guy is playing better than LeBron?
Finally, compare the populations of the USA & China in the mid 19th century. The losses in the American Civil War & China’s Taiping Rebellion are probably of similar percentage.
I bought a book some 20 years ago called ‘The Pessimist’s Guide to History’ & think you’d appreciate it. Even this smarty-pants-history-major learned a thing or two (for example, that ‘The Plague” was NOT a 1-time thing, it happened repeatedly thru centuries & continents, although the biggest human loss I think was the occurrence in the mid 14th century.) And speaking of the “Black Death” – did you see the news just last week that RATS were apparently NOT responsible?! (Of course, not as shocking as the ‘Rory/Pete’ ignorance but it was prettee damn gum-swallowing to me).