STARTING FIVE

1. Peace on Earth, Goodwill Toward Men

Twelve dead after two masked gunmen and a third associate storm the offices of French satirical magazine Charlie Hebdo. 

“The zealot may be outwardly motivated by the anticipation of a great reward at the other end—wealth, fame, eternal salvation—but the real recompense is probably the obsession itself.” —Jon Krakauer, “Under the Banner of Heaven”

Fanaticism is a religion unto itself. The particulars of any religion are truly irrelevant. It’s pretty simple: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you. The rest is all drapery.

“As a means of motivating people to be cruel or inhumane-as a means of inciting evil, to borrow the vocabulary of the devout-there may be no more potent force than religion.” —Krakauer, “Under the Banner of Heaven”

MSNBC reported shortly before 6 p.m EST that one suspect had been killed and two others taken into custody, but that report has since been discredited. In fact, one man turned himself into police (an 18 year-old) while the two others, brothers in their early 30s, are still at large. That’s a bad look for NBC News. Something straight out of The Newsroom. 

Finally, I’m Catholic and this dope doesn’t speak for me.

2. Mozgov Cocktail

The Cleveland Cavaliers’ extreme makeover continues, as today they traded away two first-round draft picks for a starting left tackle center, Timofey Mozgov. The 7’1″, 250-pound Russian played for Cavs coach David Blatt in the 2012 Olympics and the Cavs needed someone bigger than Kevin Love to tell J.R. Smith (and Kyrie Irving) to pass the ball.

3. Morris Not the Merrier

So I was watching the highly entertaining Phoenix Suns last night, who are a poor man’s San Antonio Spurs (and have nearly an identical record, 22-16 as opposed to 21-15). You see, Goran Dragic is like a hybrid Tony Parker/Manu Ginobili (he’s a lefty, even). Second-year center Alex Len is a discount Big Fundamental: inscrutable demeanor, long arms, loves to block shots and clean up the offensive glass. Gerald Green is Kawhi Leonard.

Then there are the Morris twins, Markeiff and Marcus. The former may be the best player on the squad. The latter is a lesser version, but not bad. Not a starter, though. So at Minnesota, on the second night of a back to back and with the Suns trailing a T-Wolves team that had lost 12 in a row, Marcus gets T’ed up going into a timeout (He was hot, if that’s possible when it’s minus-4 outside in Minny, about being inadvertently struck in the face by a T-Wolf, which is nothing like an AirWolf). It’s like Marcus wanted that  T. His brother had gotten a “T” in the first half, and these twins do like to do things together.

So Suns coach Jeff Hornacek, as mild mannered as they come, let Marcus have it. Verbally. Hey, we don’t need to being giving away vanity points at the moment. And Marcus got in his coach’s face, but a lot. It wasn’t pretty.

Hornacek subbed Marcus out the rest of the game (which he may have, anyway). Rule of Thumb: If you are the second-best twin on your team, don’t give your coach any lip. By the way, Goran’s little brother, Zoran, is also a Sun. They shouldn’t be called the Suns. They should be called the Brothers. Hello? Hello!?!

Phoenix won by 2.

4. To Die For

I hope this was not entirely staged, but this clip of Nicole Kidman informing Jimmy Fallon that the time they met at his apartment and she was into it romantically and he had no idea is pretty priceless. He’s so awkward after the first two minutes that it had to be real.

5. Frozen

Yes, the Cowboys and Packers will meet in a playoff game at Lambeau Field for the first time since the iconic 1967 Ice Bowl, a game won by Green Bay after referees de-iced the plane of the goal line and decided that Bart Starr had crossed it.

Stat you’ll hear early and often: the Packers are 8-0 at home this season, the Cowboys are 8-0 on the road.

Reserves

Letterman Top 10, Baseball Hall of Fame edition…and the all-time Albert Achievement Awards.

Remote Patrol

Heat at Trail Blazers

TNT 10:30 p.m.

Why? Because no two NBA cities are located farther from one another than Miami and Portland (come back, Seattle…we’d even take Vancouver). Also, because Damian Lillard is proving that his performances in Scream and Scooby Doo were no joke. Finally, because with almost an Atlanta Hawk-like lack of fanfare, the Blazers have the league’s second-best record (27-8, tied with the Hawks).