by John Walters
Samuel Bankman-House Arrested
The FTX kingpin is arrested, extradited from the Bahamas to the U.S., indicted and then released on bail of $250 million and confined to shacking up with mom and dad. Mom, where’s the meatloaf?!?!?!?
This is a situation-comedy reality show waiting to be filmed. “My son the genius can afford $250 million in bail but he won’t even chip in for pizza delivery? Oy vey!”
Truly, it’s a Silicon Valley plot even Mike Judge never envisioned. Imagine SBF being confined to Ehrlich’s Pied Piper incubator. Hilarity ensues.
Meanwhile, two of SBF’s closest colleagues at FTX/Alameda, on-again off-again honey boo Caroline Ellison (CEO of Alameda in late 20s), and FTX co-founder Gary Wang, 32, have both pleaded guilty to fraud charges and are cooperating with authorities.
SBF about to find out that being rich in prison don’t count for much.
Peyton’s Place? Norman
After pulling an obnoxious ball cap pump-fake (his parents should be embarrassed that they laughed; he’s only a teen) that indicated he’d be switching his commitment from Notre Dame to Oregon, 4-star safety Peyton Bowen opted to take a knee. Or rather, not to sign.
Today Bowen’s double-reverse ended with his NLI signature going to Oklahoma. Norman is a 150-mile straight shot north of his hometown of Denton, Texas. Maybe Bowen simply decided to trust his gut.
What we do know is that Peyton Bowen, a safety, is the most heralded (or notorious) recruit in Brett Venables’ class. And that in Austin, No. 1 overall recruit Arch Manning may step in as the starting QB immediately. Hence, next October the Red River Rivalry could well bring us the first Peyton-Manning encounter.
Word play. Yes. Magical. Love it.
Elon, Meet Carl Fisher
A few years ago I was doing some background research for a feature on Montauk I hoped to write (never came to fruition) and that’s the first time I learned of Carl Fisher. In the Roaring Twenties Fisher, already a man worth nine figures, had built the swankiest hotel (the Montauk Manor… it still stands) that the quaint town at the tip of Long Island had or has ever seen.
To learn about Fisher and to study the path of Elon Musk is to remember Rule No. 2 I always provided to my class (“It’s all been done”). Fisher grew up in Indiana a bicycle enthusiast. Soon he got into cars just as this newest mode of transportation was coming into fashion. To dumb it down, Fisher and a friend basically developed the patent for the first headlights, sold the company, and were paid tens of millions of dollars.
If you’ve read Lincoln Highway, you know how instrumental Fisher was in developing that cross-contintental road, as well as the Dixie Highway. How he’s basically responsible for the Indy 500 being the Brickyard (he was its president from 1909-1923, the race’s first years) as well as for the causeways that link Miami Beach to the mainland. He was worth more than $250 million at his peak in the mid-twenties.
Fisher even owned an island, Fisher’s Island (Hello, Mr. Epstein), that is still an ultra-exclusive playground for the wealthy off the coast of Connecticut (Robert Morse as Bert Cooper namedrops it in a Season 1 episode of Mad Men).
Then it all crashed in on him. Bad real-estate investments, the stock market crash, etc. His wife left him, his family disowned him. Fisher spent his final years living in a modest cottage in Miami, spending his days sitting on a park bench, virtually anonymous. Good times never last. Good people do. Elon seems to have plenty of work to do on the latter.
And yes, this should totally become a screenplay.
No sour grapes, but the Peyton Bowen(s) of the world don’t tend to work out. Or maybe, when they don’t, it is much, much more noticeable. I honestly wish the kid the best of luck. Enjoy college…