by John Walters

Obama and Trumpism

We’ve held fast to our pledge not to watch any moment of either convention, and not because they’re without all of those lovely people who ordinarily crowd the arenas. We did, however, read parts of 44th president Barack Obama’s speech on Tuesday night and these words resonated:

“This administration has shown it will tear our democracy down if that’s what it takes to win.”

We already know that Donald Trump has a “heads you lose, tails I win” rationale to the upcoming election. If he gets more votes (in the Electoral College), he gets four more years. If he gets fewer votes, the election was rigged.

We already know that the cult of those who follow him has no problem with this. Go ahead. Go ask a Trump supporter you know. Ask them if they agree with the president that if Joe Biden wins the election that it was rigged. Ask them if they believe the election can be fair (Do you think they’d feel that way if it was Biden trailing by 10 points in the polls?).

The people I know who want Trump to remain in power put democracy and the Constitution a distant second (or not at all) to the Republican party remaining in power. Even if they don’t come out and say it, they mean it. They were all for democracy until there was a chance (thanks, Obama) that it meant the white way of life would no longer be the prevailing order. Then they had second thoughts about democracy.

Maybe Joe Biden will win. And maybe the transition from 45 to 46 will be relatively smooth (I doubt it). But Trumpism isn’t going away. Those white folks who resent their America being taken from them will do everything, including defacing every American ideal, to remain in power.

Trump may go. Trumpism, alas, isn’t going anywhere.

Last week I spoke to an old friend who lives in California but was born in Canada. She told me that if Trump wins, she’s moving back to Calgary. Not even the least bit ambivalent about that. Then she said something that stuck with me. “Who would vote for someone who gets compared to Hitler as often as Trump does?” she asked. “Their response is always, ‘He’s nowhere near as bad as Hitler.’ It’s not, ‘He’s nothing like Hitler.'”

She’s right.

Put Him In The Most Aptly Named Club

This story on George Best by Pablo Maurer in The Athletic is a treat (click on the link if for no other reason than to watch Best’s unbelievable goal). The late ’70s and early ’80s North American Soccer League probably merits its own book (if someone hasn’t already written one). The world’s greatest washed-up soccer legends—Pele, Best, Giorgio Chinaglia, Franz Beckenbauer, Johan Cruyff—all made the pilgrimage to the States for big bucks, sexy models and probably plenty of coke and more. What a time to have been alive…and kicking!

Flag Capitals? Fog Capitals?

Poor, dumb Reds announcer Thom Brennaman. What was he thinking here? Of course POTUS would just claim either A) this is locker room talk or B) he said “flag” and you just didn’t hear it correctly. Either way, here we are as a country: a man who is an announcer for a baseball team that hasn’t mattered in nearly 30 years is going to lose his job over saying the word “fag” but the guy who’s president said “grab them by the pussy” (in a similar circumstance) and keeps on going.

Mosquito Coast

It sounds like something so dumb that only Florida could think of it, but it’s actually not as dumb as it sounds (we hope): In the next two years scientists will release 750 million mosquitoes in the Florida Keys.

But they’re not regular mosquitoes. They’re quite literally mutants (scientists have given them the cuddly name of OX5034, which also happens to be the shipping number for my next Amazon delivery), and when they breed with regular bite-my-ankles-you-bastards mosquitoes, they’re designed such that female offspring will die. Now if only scientists could genetically produce a similar species of OX5034 Trumps.

Chris, Rock

https://www.instagram.com/tv/CD40n1ygy72/?utm_source=ig_web_button_share_sheet

As you know, we’ve become huge fans of Chris Fowler‘s Instagram page the past couple years (brains, wealth, a love of the outdoors, a passion for college football and rugged good looks… it’s hard to believe there’s two of us). Here he is having just summited one of the 14,000-foot peaks in his adopted home state (from his tween years) of Colorado.

Chris turns 58 on Sunday. Do you know what Verne Lundquist looked like when he was 58? I mean…