by John Walters

The MH Pick Is For The Birds

Our Super Bowl LI pick: the Atlanta Falcons.

The Patriots have the greatest coach-QB duo since Walsh-Montana, and arguably the best of all time (if it weren’t for the G-Men, it would be inarguable). And they’ve been to seven Super Bowls in the Belichick-Brady era (both men arrived in 2000).

So why do I prefer the Art Blank‘ers: 1) Matt Ryan led the NFL in passer rating and yards per attempt and was second in overall passing yards (behind Drew Brees) and in touchdown passes (behind Aaron Rodgers), 2) Atlanta was second in total offense in the NFL this season and 3) the Patriots have not been tested much this season. The four playoff teams New England played during the season were the two they later beat in the playoffs (Houston and Pittsburgh), the Dolphins twice, and the Seahawks (who beat them).

The Falcons are the best team New England has seen all season and they have the best quarterback New England has seen all season. And yes, there’s no fun in picking the Death Star to prevail.

2. Atheist And A Theist

On Wednesday night funny and caustic Ricky Gervais sat down with occasionally funny and caustic Stephen Colbert on Late Show. During the first segment they did the usual talk show pablum, but after the commercial break they got into an earnest, not hostile, but earnest conversation about the existence of God. It’s terrific. Watch how engrossed both get in the discussion; it’s as if they’ve both forgotten they’re on a talk show in front of a live studio audience and the millions of us at home. They’re just two smart men who happen to    have diametrically opposite thoughts about THE question that makes the world go round (and has been responsible for millions of deaths; personally, I think Rust Cohle said it best).

3. Washington States Its Case

Remember that besides perennial powers Alabama, Clemson and Ohio State, Washington, coached by Chris Petersen, also made the College Football Playoff. By the way, U-Dub’s recruiting class rankings on Rivals since 2013 go: 18th, 37th, 31st, 37th and this week, 23rd). Either Coach Pete is better at assessing talent, better at coaching what he harvests, or the dudes at Rivals don’t get out to the Pacific Northwest as much as they should.

Anyway, now from the eastern end of the state comes Mark Few and Gonzaga, which easily handled a traditionally tough game in Provo to easily handle BYU, 85-75. The Zags, the top -ranked and last undefeated team (23-0) in the country, led by 16 at the half. Nigel Williams-Goss, who transferred from U-Dub after 2015, finished with a game-high 33.

In the top four in each sport, no state has had a better academic year than The Evergreen State. And yeah, I’d take Kansas, Arizona and Kentucky over the Zags every day of the week, but Few’s team has only one scary regular-season game remaining: next Saturday’s twilight (5:15 p.m. local tip) tussle at No. 19 Saint Mary’s.

4. Ren and Donald

Since the election, people have uncovered clips from both The Simpsons and South Park that described our 45th president perfectly. Now, thanks to the first heated phone call ever between anyone from the USA and Australia (I mean, they’re almost as nice as Canadians),  this moment from Ren and Stimpy gets added to the list. This clip has to be, what, 25 years old?

5. Keep Your Eye On The Ball

This was the scene in Moscow just 17 months ago, after Boris Nemtsov, a leader of the resistance movement to president Vladimir Putin, was murdered on a sidewalk not far from the Kremlin. Nemtsov, a charismatic figure, was scheduled to lead a protest against Putin and Russia’s invasion of Ukraine the following day, when assailants drove up and executed him as he was walking along a sidewalk that runs adjacent to the Moskva River.

Now another Russian activist, Vladimir Kara-Murza, has been hospitalized in Moscow after suspicions that he was poisoned. Kara-Murza, a Russian exile who lives in Virginia, nearly died two years ago when he was mysteriously poisoned in Moscow. He was in a coma for a week. He returned to Moscow last week to screen a movie about Nemtsov and lo and behold, he suddenly has the same symptoms.

Putin is ruthless. And this is why Trump/Bannon admire him. As Trump himself told the London Times just before his inauguration: “I like strength. And I like order.” Don’t fool yourselves, America. You elected a dictator. He’s just trying to figure out how far he can take it.

Meanwhile, Russia has arrested two FSB officials and charged them with treason for allegedly supplying documents to the CIA. What did they supply? And will we ever see them.

Quick thought: Smart people ask questions. Idiots chant slogans. Or as my friend Wendell Barnhouse put it, “Smart people seek truth. Fascists repeat lies.”

Music 101

Heart Of Stone

In November of 1964 the Rolling Stones were in Los Angeles and recorded this Jagger-Richards tune. It was released one month later and became their second top-20 tune. Think about this as you listen Jagger was just 21 years old and “Keef” was only 20. They didn’t know they were going to be THE ROLLING STONES when they laid down this track, but they knew who they wanted to be.

Remote Patrol

Blazing Saddles

TCM 10:30 p.m.

Gene Wilder went on an historic run in the early Seventies with Willy Wonka, this film and then Young Frankenstein. Mel Brooks (center) and Wilder teamed up for the final two after having worked together in 1968 with The Producers (originally a film). Here’s my Newsweek piece on how and why they hooked up.