by John Walters
R.I.P., American Decency
This is a text from a female friend that I received when I woke up (with very minor revisions) (UPDATE: My friend consented to let me use her name; it’s my old friend Moose, who lives in Toronto; she lived in the USA for more than a decade and Toronto is farther south than Minneapolis, anyway, so it may as well be in America)….
“I’m so depressed. It’s literally soul-crushing as a woman. Everything we were taught to believe is a lie. How can a man who literally says he’s going to grab women’s pussies still even be in this race let alone get elected? What does anyone tell their daughters tomorrow? What does any woman tell themselves? How does maybe the most qualified candidate ever lose to a misogynistic, racist, narcissistic, awful human being?
I cannot tell you how discouraged this makes me. That people would prefer this piece of crap over a capable woman is pretty much every experience I’ve had at work. I don’t think I’ve ever been this discouraged and this disgusted. Honestly, it was just too much as a woman to watch this happening. I went to bed and I cried. You can make jokes about me all you want but this election proves that women are still second-class citizens, still seen as objects, and I despair for all the little girls out there.
How many times have I found my boss’ hand on my knee, or been pinned in an elevator, or been passed over and paid less? How many times has a man thought it was okay to put his hands on me? How many times have men ignored what was coming out of my mouth and tried to get a peak down my shirt? How many times have I been condescended to, had to listen to inappropriate jokes, had to play at being “one of the boys?” How many times have I literally fought off a sexual assault by a man senior to me at work?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b1_QoHu8EJM
How many times have men talked to me in ways they would never have talked to a man? How much money over the years have I lost by being paid less than a man while working longer, harder and better? And we all keep fighting through it because we’d been raised to believe that we could do and be anything we wanted if we worked hard enough, tried hard enough, were enough. They’ve elected a female president of Pakistan! And this nation that holds itself up as the model of society, the greatest country on earth, elects as their head of state a truly vile, criminal, dangerous, lying piece of crap.
A man who will stack the Supreme Court to take away the right of a woman to make choices about her own body. A man who considers sexual assault “locker room talk.” A man who preaches hate, racism, division and misogyny. A man who truly believes women are objects for his enjoyment and second-class citizens at best.
I’m so not kidding. You just cannot know what this feels like. And how do I explain to my 10-year-old niece that “the bad man on TV who says such terrible things and uses such bad words that my mum turns off the TV” has been elected head of the greatest country on earth? How can I honestly look at her and tell her she can be anything she wants and do anything she wants? How can I move forward?
That that man is what people prefer over a capable woman means that there is no hope. That people are totally okay with his actions and the words that come out of his mouth. It’s sickening. Every part of me hurts. And every battle I’ve fought through as a woman means nothing and we are all fools for ever believing things would change when the worst example of a man beats a woman who for 30 years has never quit on anything. I truly, truly despair. And my heart and soul are just broken.
If WE were email buddies, I’d have written you the exact same sentiment but with far less eloquence & far more CURSE words.
If the judges so please, I humbly submit “Munched” and “Trumped” as alternate headlines for today’s post. The eternal optimist in me has to believe that Ivanka will step up to influence her father’s future behavior. Or she will be forced to mitigate his remarks into perpetuity.
The 2000 election forever changed how I felt about the political process of this country. The 2016 election has now forever changed how I feel about this COUNTRY. Trump is a lying sack of shit, a sociopath who should be in jail & not the White House but he is but a symptom of the cancer that is DESTROYING this nation, what was once looked upon by the rest of the world as the bastion of freedom & equality, where over 150 years ago, millions fought & died to PRESERVE this union of democracy, this “grand experiment”. All those folks & millions more weep today, for our country has FAILED. Failed at the basic level – in educating our populace how to recognize a con man & most of all, that the greatest evil, the surest “destroyer of worlds” is HATE. I must keep reminding myself of the latter or be consumed in what is our country’s most dire hour since the Civil War. May all of us teetering on the edge today draw strength from our fellow “travellers”.
I am not a woman. I am not black. I am not Latino. I am not a Muslim. I am a part of the majority.
To all minorities and women that have been ridiculed by the President-elect through decades of reality-TV propaganda, I try to sympathize with you to the best of my ability. With that, I understand that is not merely enough.
I, for one, was raised in rural Nebraska. The county in which I grew up voted 70.6% for Trump. Middle-aged white men got what they wanted. It is my hope that the children they had (myself included) can be more empathetic.
I’m not shocked. It is confusing, however, to try and understand the true feelings of the American people.
The people have made the bed and now must lie it it.
Well Jacob, even though MD went for Clinton (60%) & my current county of the past 30 years voted 79% for HRC, my original HOME county voted 67% for Trump. They have voted Republican for about the past 30 years & WHY does NOT surprise or confuse me at all – they are largely non- college educated, racist, & sexist & while I love my home farm & the surrounding LAND, I have chosen not to live there due to this reality.
Jacob, don’t put it all on white men, 53% of white women voted for Hillary.
Everyone figured that white men would support Trump, although I do think it was 1% different than 2012. I don’t think anyone anticipated that Trump would get 42% of the female vote let alone 53% of the white woman vote.
OK. White, uneducated men. 67% of the vote. By far his biggest support group.
There’s something shocking in our shock today. We knew 24 hours ago, and for months prior, that regardless of everything horrifying and despicable that had been revealed about Trump, at least 55 million or so people were going to vote for him. That the actual number came in at 59 million or so shouldn’t be such a lightning bolt. Everything about our country that we came to realize last night and this morning — about our nationalism, misogyny, feeling of powerlessness, whatever you want to pin this on — it should have been as clear to us yesterday as it is today. Its just the electoral math that has forced everyone’s eyes open.
PS Who knew Chachi’s endorsement could carry so much weight? 🙂
Also, everything your e-mail correspondent says is dead-on regarding the level of misogyny, sexism, and outright assault of women that voters were willing to accept in Trump. Why did 42% of women vote for Trump? What was it about Hillary that made Trump’s treatment of women anything but a deal-breaker for women voters?
Let me get this straight – for the 2nd time in 16 years, the DEMOCRAT actually won the Presidential election but the “Electoral College” stole it for the Republican? HELLooooo!
Well, jdubs, at least your state & mine (NY & MD) are not guilty of this travesty. What if all the blue states seceded? BSA? Blue States of America? Argh. My god, if Lincoln had seen the future, he’d of saved himself a train trip to PA & just let ‘those’ states go…
Your friend’s text made me cry.
I disagree with your guy up there, this election was NOT a “whitelash” it’s a backlash by the ignorant & STOOPID in this country. When it finally dawns on them that the future White House occupant will NOT do a damn thing for their jobs/lives & in fact looks down upon them as “losers”, they will be even angrier. THEN what? It ALMOST makes one feel sorry for them.
I have never wanted to live anywhere other than the United States of America. I’ve wanted to travel more internationally, yes, just not live there. Until today. I’ve never wanted to live in a state that seceded from this country. Until today. I’ve long recognized the deep & growing anger in this country & was amazed at the people on TV ‘news’ who seemed oblivious. However, just like the TV folks & political “experts”, I underestimated the sheer ignorance & stubborn gullibility of the electorate. At the end of the day, we thought they would of COURSE “do the right thing” & not elect a lying sociopath to the most powerful position on earth. Well, who’s stupid, now? (raises hand & hangs head).
And one more thing! I couldn’t bare to watch the election coverage last night so watched the Cavs lose (nooooo!) & then thought I’d give CATS (on a PBS channel) another chance. OMG, it was just as dreadful as I’d remembered, except of course for ‘Memory’ –
“All alone in the moonlight
I can smile at the old days
I was beautiful then
I remember the time I knew what happiness was
Let the memory live again
Every streetlamp
Seems to beat a fatalistic warning
Someone mutters
And the streetlamp gutters
And soon it will be morning
Daylight
I must wait for the sunrise
I must think of a new life
And I musn’t give in
When the dawn comes
Tonight will be a memory too”
To hear that song performed last night – was THAT a premonition or what?!
The educated folks in 1933 Germany probably told each other to “relax, keep calm, it will be alright”…
IT’S NOT ALRIGHT, PEOPLE! DO NOT KEEP CALM! This election & what it symbolizes is in a 3-way tie for 2nd on the ‘Worst Disasters in American History’ list (9/11, Pearl Harbor the other two). What do they all have in common? Our country lies in a smoldering ruin, although this time it is figurative. For now.
You know all those recent movies (& current TV series) which features the White House &/or Capitol being blown or shot the hell up by terrorists? I truly believe this is worse.
I wrote Marty Dugard I had his next book subject/title but that his co-writer might balk – The Killing of America : The Election of Donald Trump.
🙁 🙁 🙁 🙁 🙁
As someone with a doctorate, I find it highly entertaining that “Susie B.” has compared Trump’s election to the rise of Hitler. I also find it ironic that she has labeled Trump supporters stupid and ignorant, after making one of the most inappropriate, asinine comparisons I have ever seen written on the Internet.
Hillary supporters assail Trump’s character with a straight face while routinely making nasty, stereotypical comments about large segments of this country’s population. Modern elitist Democrats, thy name is “Hypocrisy.”
(Drops mic.)
Are you KIDDING?! In what field is your doctorate? I graduated magna cum laude with a degree in history, what is YOUR knowledge?
At least Hitler could paint.
Also, after this election, I’ve decided that the “let’s work together” script is HOW WE LOST, so the hell with that. Live by the sword, die by the sword…
HEY SMARTY PANTS – did you look at the voting stats? What demo group was the largest block of Trump voters? NON-COLLEGE EDUCATED.
And Hillary supporters don’t need to assail Trump’s “character”, he does that himself on a daily basis.
Bahdabumdum. Thank-yeeww & g’night.
And thanks for rushing to my defense there, jdubs. Or not.
Any time, Susie B.?