by John Walters
A Medium Happy 71st to Jaclyn Smith, a.k.a. “Kelly” from Charlie’s Angels
Starting Five
Assault by battery: Perez and Kluber combined for 6 shutout innings, 15 strikeouts and two home runs
Whiff Series
Three Cleveland pitchers—Corey Kluber, Andrew Miller and Cody Allen—combined for 15 strikeouts as the Tribe took Game 1, 6-0. Things to ponder: 1) the Cubs, the third-most prolific offense in all of baseball this season behind the Red Sox and Rockies, have been shut out in three of their past six games, 2) Tribe catcher Roberto Perez, the 9th hitter in the order, hit two bombs (for 4 RBI); no 9th hitter had ever hit two home runs in a World Series game before that, 3) Kluber struck out eight in the first three innings, also a World Series first, 4) the Tribe are now 61-0 this season when they grab a lead of three runs or more, 5) Terry Francona is 9-0 as a manager in World Series games, and 6) John Smoltz did an excellent job; Harold Reynolds ain’t coming back to a World Series booth.
2. Fault Lines
Both the Dubs and KD are riding four-game losing streaks at the moment
The Golden State Warriors, who won their first 24 games last season and did not lose a home game until April 1st, were blown out at Oracle (in front of Queen Bae and that dude she’s been hanging out with) last night by 29 by the Spurs.
Reason to worry? Yeah, a little. It’s not so much the addition of future HOF’er Kevin Durant that is the problem, it’s the subtraction of big men Andrew Bogut and Marrese Speights. The Dubs are gonna score, but are they gonna defend or rebound this year? San Antonio out rebounded them 55-35, which is kind of significant. Watch them make a midseason trade for a big at some point.
The Dubs looked lost, but “Inside the NBA” was in midseason form with their riff on a Portland fan their cameras uncovered
Yes, it was only one game, but Klay Thompson did not look very happy the entire night. He took the fewest shots of GSW’s big four and wound up with the fewest points: 11. Keep an eye on the Klay Happiness meter, and I’ll say it now: I bet there’s a coach in Los Angeles who would love to have him.
Keep an eye on Spurs’ second-year swing man Jonathon Simmons. Former D-Leaguer scored 20 points in just 28 minutes and had a LeBronian block on a Steph Curry breakaway in the third quarter.
Finally, Kawhi Leonard MVP alert. In his first game since Tim Duncan’s retirement, Leonard scored a career-high 35 and also had 5 rebounds and 5 steals.
Finally FINALLY, if you follow me on Twitter, you know I was never in favor of KD going to GSW: bad for both teams and, I believe, ultimately bad for him. He had a better situation in OKC and that decision was made too soon after season’s end.
3. “She Turned Me Into A Newt”
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oMlC0-Ut8Ng
If you have yet to see Megyn Kelly versus Newt Gingrich, you should watch. “I think your defensiveness on this may speak volumes, sir.” ROASTED!
.@MegynKelly made a total fool out of herself tonight- attacking @realDonaldTrump
And as for Dan Scavino, Jr.,’s question, I think Kelly could go to any network that ponies up enough cash. She’s taken her stand this election, and it’s sort of a shame none of her FOX colleagues came to her defense. Considering her ex-boss, Roger Ailes, was being sued for sexual harassment with nearly as many accusers as Donald has, maybe we shouldn’t have been that surprised.
4. When They Go High, We Go Jadlow
Jadlow played at IU in the late Eighties
Former Indiana Hoosier Todd Jadlow penned a memoir, Jadlow: On The Rebound, about his overcoming drug and alcohol addiction, but also dropped in a few spicy anecdotes about playing for Bob Knight, one of which included the legendary coach grabbing players’ testicles (not in a sexual manner, but to see how tough they were?). Anyway, recall that Knight has stumped for Trump, and cue that Hoosier hysteria.
5. Don’t Stand, Don’t Stand So, Don’t Stand So Close To Me
McKenna
Scottsdale Chaparral High School is filled with the well-to-do and the glamorous: alums include Paul Konerko, Taylor Lewan, Darrell Bevell (the Seahawk coach who called for the pass in SB 49), actress Busy Phillips and Stephanie Meyer, author of the Twilight series. Two years ago Newsweek rated it the No. 1 high school in Arizona.
Last month the school’s track coach, Chris McKenna, 38, a former “Teacher of the Year,” was sentenced to 10 years in prison for having sex with a student. The student attended a different high school, but McKenna had met her at a meet. Worse, after the relationship was discovered and he was first arrested, McKenna continued meeting the 17 year-old, buying them both disposable phones and meeting her in parking lots while wearing an ankle bracelet.
McKenna was (is still?) married and the relationship lasted 6 to 9 months.
An aside: the judge in the case, Chris Coury, attended high school with me and was a year or two behind me in the same dorm at the same college. I don’t know if he will play himself in the inevitable Lifetime movie.
Music 101
Lucille
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4SDVkdcO8ts
No, this song is not a tribute to a bat wrapped with barbed wire. This was the song that brought country star Kenny Rogers into the mainstream and made him an international success (the song went to No. 1 in the UK), even though younger folks may think it was “The Gambler.” This tune was a staple of AM radio in early 1977, hitting No. 5 on the Billboard charts. I’ll admit that as a kid I thought he was singing “with four hundred children,” which made me wonder a little about farm folk.
Remote Patrol
Thunder at Sixers
ESPN 8 p.m.
Keep an eye on 6’10” Philly rookie Dario Saric out of Croatia
Yeah, yeah, Game 2 of the World Series (first pitch at 7:08 p.m.) is a must-watch, but this one intrigues me. The Sixers will unveil Joel Embiid after his red-shirt year, while Russell Westbrook cannot wait to show off now that Kevin Durant has departed. I think he’ll go for 40, especially since Philly could be starting two rookies and guard Jerryd Bayless is injured. Also hurt: Ben Simmons and Nerlens Noel. Finally, I’m curious to see Domantas Sabonis’ rookie debut for OKC.
I honestly don’t see why OKC can’t be a top 4 team in the West. Steven Adams and Domantas Sabonis are two bigs that can cause havoc for Golden State (see last night). They matchup fairly well with San Antonio. The Clippers are, well, the Clippers. Ultra talented, but never seem to gell for long stretches.
Analytics can tell you a lot. But, it can’t gauge emotions. Westbrook unleashed is scary. And let’s not forget, they did get Victor Oladipo from Orlando as well.
I don’t know. Wouldn’t surprise me if they won 50 + games this year.
Hmmm, interesting – apparently I can be a witness in a criminal case to send at least one high school science teacher to PRISON for 10 years. When I was a sophomore in college, I got a new dorm roommate, a freshman. She had been a science whiz in her high school & told me as were getting to know each other that she’d had “relationships” (I was so dense, it took me awhile to figure out she meant sexual) with TWO of her high school science teachers, one of whom was married. I’m not sure if I totally believed her at the time as the science teachers in MY high school were all 40-60 years old & shall we say ‘appearance challenged’. Anyhoo, I found out she was not exaggerating (or lying) when I walked into our dormroom while she was, ahem, “occupied” in her bed with one of them. He was the married one. She assured me the couple had an “open marriage” & gave me her copy of ‘The Harrad Experiment’ to read. (Excuse me while I guffaw at THAT memory). If I remember correctly, her “relationships” with these a-holes began when she was a h.s. sophomore. I was shocked but since she told me “in confidence” & she portrayed herself as this ‘sexually liberated young woman’, I said nothing to anybody. Trying to appear “cool” & liberated myself I guess. However, “open marriage” or not, Harrad-Schmarad or not, I thought those so-called teachers were SCUM. Thankfully, my roommate eventually broke it off with the one remaining guy, although he kept calling her for months (trying to re-kindle). I have not kept in touch with that girl so have no idea how she feels today about what transpired all those years ago.
Meanwhile, what a night for Cleveland! Raise the NBA championship banner, pass out gigantic knuckle-scraping diamond-encrusted rings to players/coaches/owners/staff, perform individualized handshakes among all the players that had me more impressed than any DWTS routines, watch their beloved basketball team play an actual basketball game & stomp the Knicks by 29, & then see the city’s baseball team win the 1st game of this year’s World Series. Pret-tee big night!
And THEN, the icing on the cake is to watch from afar as their NBA Finals opponent, albeit a new & “improved” version, now a so-called “Super Team” who could supposedly win “78 reg season games, easy”, fall to the Spurs on their HOME COURT by, you guessed it, 29 points. (I confess – I did not watch this game & when I found out what had transpired, I exclaimed with even more glee than watching the Cavs’ handshake dance!).
And I think you’re totally right, jdubs, it’s not Steph that Warriors fans need to be concerned about, it’s Klay &/or Draymond. BTW, who exactly do you see being traded away for a ‘big man’?
Question (1st, go ahead & groan, roll your eyes, throw up your hands even, get it all outta the way) – do you think the Cavs winning the championship/breaking the ‘Curse had any effect on the Indians now being in the World Series? Positive vibes? The overwhelming sense of joy & ‘anything is possible’ optimism that enveloped the city from early June thru the entire summer MUST have affected the baseball team too, don’t you think? Or is it all just a coincidence that TWO teams of two different sports who had not won championships in over 50 years are BOTH in their sport’s Finals in the same year? 🙂
Or has God decided to wipe away that last half-century of sporting misery in ONE 5 month swoop?
One more thing – as mentioned here a time or two, this year has NOT been so good for my stock portfolio (last year was nuthin’ to brag about either. sigh, sniff-sniff). If I didn’t own AMZN, ATVI, NVDA & a few others that have perked me up this past year, I’d be moping for sure. Well, here’s another to perk me up : AKAM! Akamai : Aka-MEEE, Aka-MY, Oh me oh my! I’ve owned this since 2011 & it’s finally back on its way to a triple.
Speaking of triple, did you see that Sweet Pea had a TRIPLE DOUBLE last night? 🙂