by John Walters
Happy 59th, Mr. Hanks. You won two Oscars in the early ’90s in other films, but this was your best role.
Starting Five
“Clang clang clang!” went the free throw!” All that fuss over a 41.7% FT shooter
1. Chris-Crossing Jordan*
The judges will also accept “Many Rivers to Cross,” “My Dinner With DeAndre,” “Where Jordan”, “Banana Boat Republic” and “Emoji-nal Rescue”
To be honest, I didn’t follow this saga as closely as many of you. All I know is that Dallas got a “Yes” but forgot to put a ring on Jordan’s finger. And then Los Angeles swooped in and won him back. It’s kind of like The Philadelphia Story, no? With emojis.
2. “She’s a Beauty, That No. 9”
Pluto, actual size
The New Horizons probe, which I’d always thought was a Gin Blossoms album but is actually a NASA exploration module, will arrive on the farthest planet (or is it?) in our solar system next Tuesday. It was launched nine years ago. So I don’t want to hear about your United Airlines delay.
3. Groin Pains
Awful moment, terrific photo. It’s nice to see a Cain who is his brother’s keeper.
Kanas City Royal left fielder Alex Gordon “heard the muscle in his groin pop.” That doesn’t sound good.
4. See You in September
Vintage Eddie
You know what I hate about rock festivals (that’s not a question; I mean, you DO know): dozens upon dozens of bands, most of them not worth a crap. So here comes the Global Citizens Fest, and it’s coming to my ci-TAY, on the Great Lawn in Central Park, on Sept. 26.
The acts? Pearl Jam, Beyonce, Coldplay and Ed Sheeran (in case you were wondering, Taylor Swift be in Nashville that night).
5. Gyllenhaal of Fame
Stop me if you’ve heard this: white boxer down on his luck who is a lefty; black boxer who is flashy and is his nemesis. If anyone can make Southpaw work, it’s Jake Gyllenhaal, who has passed Ryan Gosling as the best American actor under the age of 35. Solid profile of Maggie’s bro yesterday in Grantland.
Music 101
Goin’ Outta My Head
I heard this on a Mad Men episode and it brought back memories of riding in the back of my parents’ wood-paneled Chevy station wagon. Anyway, I never knew that the vocalist was actually a dude. This is Little Anthony & The Imperials, who recorded the song in 1964. It was later covered by just about everyone, including Shirley Bassey, The Lettermen and Frank Sinatra.
Remote Patrol
Lausanne Track Meet
beIN Sports 2 p.m.
Emma Coburn (left) and Jenny Simpson, good friends and teammates (New Balance, formerly at CU) could break American records in the 3000 meter steeplechase and 1500, respectively. Mo Farah runs the 5000. Best track meet of the summer before Worlds in Beijing.
“A League Of Their Own” was filmed in my hometown (Evansville, IN). The ballpark they used is 3rd oldest in the nation, behind Fenway & Wrigley. It just had its 100th birthday a few weeks ago. My sister was an extra in the film, and reported that Hanks stayed and chatted up the locals during shooting breaks in the oppressive Southern Indiana summer heat, while Madonna and Rosie ran off to their trailers.
“Criss-Crossing Jordan” & “Emoji-nal Rescue”. Cracks me up!
Setting aside that I find ALL the money in the “big 3” professional sports INSANE (not just players’ salaries, but ticket prices, TV deals, ALL of it), if DeAndre “Can’t Buy Me a Free-Throw*” Jordan is gonna make $22 MILLION a YEAR then Sweet Pea should get at least $40 million!
* If the NBA was like pro-cycling & Jordan continues to be a DETRIMENT to his play-off team on the floor due to his woeful free-throwing, the OWNER & GM of his team would be trash-talking him to the press. Every day. And threatening to try to get out of the contract. (Plus, only a handful of guys in the entire sport would make even $1-4 million a year & there is no player’s union & thus you have almost no say in your sport & your team’s very EXISTENCE is at risk EVERY SINGLE YEAR if they lose their main sponsor while the company that owns the Tour de France gets richer every year & refuses to share the media money, but I digress.)
I’m still tingling from the Women’s World Cup win! Once we beat Germany, I felt pretty good about our chances against Japan but WHO would have seen THAT 1st half coming? ! NOOOOBODY! I’m not sure if I screamed more in shock or glee that 1st 16 minutes. So, so happy for those players, the USWNT organization & women’s sports in general. HUGE TV ratings. Whooo-hooo! I’m not sure if a women’s professional soccer league will ever be a huge financial success in this country, but maybe if all the countries’ national teams “professionalize” themselves & they continue to play each other, perhaps in various ‘conference’ groupings & have a playoff & Finals every year, there’s more of a chance. (Of course, that would lessen the importance of the World Cup so FIFA would never allow it.) At least in America, we love to root for & watch our NATIONAL soccer teams against ‘foreign foes’. (Hmmm, makes you wonder why Trump hasn’t signed on as a sponsor…) Anyhoo, hurray for all those gals & hooray for the USA & hopefully at least several of the starters will get some lucrative endorsement deals!
And for the record, I LOVED those photos of LeBron & his “best NBA friends” (even if the banana boat pic made me guffaw a bit). Those guys have been buddies for about 15 years I think, BEFORE they became pros. That they are still tight after all this time is a great thing to see. Come on, WHO doesn’t like a buddy flick, I mean, pic?!
Also, if the owner of the Mavs was anyone other than Cuban (or, well, Trump too) , I’d feel sorry for him/her & that team. As for Cuban – KARMA, baby. I do wonder what the REAL story is of why DJ was going to leave the Clippers in the 1st place. Wasn’t money so was it CP3? Doc? Just wanting to be more than the 3rd offensive choice? Not feeling ‘enough luv’? Will be interesting to see how next season unfolds for that team. At least until they get mowed down by the Spurs &/or Warriors in the playoffs. 😉