Starting Five
“YOU have untapped potential….and YOU have potential…”
1. That Chip Chap
“Nobody thinks it will work, do they?”
“You just described every great success story.”
Those lines, from Say Anything, sums up the Philadelphia Beagles (yes, we hear he is changing the team name, as well) right now. The question is whether “nobody,” i.e., conventional wisdom, will prove correct after coach Chip Kelly got rid of DeSean Jackson, LeSean McCoy, Jeremy Maclin and Nick Foles, or if Kelly will. Is he a real genius or a Wile E. Coyote genius?
This from the Tweet of God: “I’m omniscient and even I don’t understand what the Eagles are doing.”
So (for) now Philly has Sam Bradford at QB. I don’t know who will be taking snaps for Kelly next September, but I’m fairly certain it’ll be a Heisman Trophy-winning quarterback who played college ball in a state that begins with the letter “O.”
Remember: In his first half as a Division I coach, Chip Kelly’s offense failed to get a first down. Two years later they played for the national championship. Chip is used to doubters.
2. Gaye Rights
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Jury to singer Robbin’ Thicke and his Blurred Lines collaborator, Pharrell Williams, in the matter of whether they must pay the estate of Marvin Gaye: Got To Give It Up. To the tune of $7.4 million.
Happy, now?
I imagine Thicke and Pharrell still made out but-fine overall on this deal.
3. The Latest on the MVP
Some day we’ll look back on 2015 in wonder as we attempt to fathom how Anthony Davis ever finished as low as 5th in an NBA MVP race…
I submit this for the irritation of Susie B. Both Grantland and SI.com’s “experts” weighed in on the NBA MVP race in the past 24 hours and the humorous thing is that LeBron James was completely excluded from the conversation. None of SI’s experts picked Russell Westbrook, even though he is having an historic season.
I’m not saying that they’re not entitled to their opinions of Curry or Harden. It’s just that there’s still 20% of the season left to play. And if there’s one thing I know about male sportswriters, it’s that they hate having to budge from an opinion once they’ve expressed it, even when they know they’re wrong (and you can sub in “men” for “male sportswriters”).
4. Copter Crashes
Two days ago: Ten people, including French Olympians Camille Muffat (a gold medal in swimming in London), Florence Arthaud (yachtswoman) and Alexis Vastine (boxing) die when two helicopters collide in mid-air in the Argentine wilderness while filming an adventure reality show.
Last night: 11 U.S. servicemen are lost when their helicopter goes down near Pensacola in low visibility conditions.
Tomorrow: Will Ferrell plans to play all nine positions in eight different Cactus League games, using a helicopter to get from ball field to ball field. Sincerely hope it doesn’t “Get Hard” for him.
Bernard 1, Fate 0
p.s. French swimmer Alain Bernard, infamous as the dude in Beijing who boasted that the French would “smash” the Yanks in the relay, and then who was out-touched during the anchor leg, was about to board one of the helicopters in Argentina but stepped off at the last minute to avoid overloading it. Whoa.
5. Ready…Aim…Inject!
The final scene from “Breaker Morant.” This is a way more dramatic way to go out…
And now a brief word on the death penalty…so Utah will allow executions by firing squad and yesterday a few people on Twitter got all huffy about how inhumane that is. Which I don’t understand. I’ve never been fatally shot or lethally injected, but I imagine both methods are pretty swift.
There’s an irony to thinking that one means of swift execution is inhumane but another is not, no? Or is it all about leaving a good-looking corpse? Besides, has anyone ever filmed a poignant lethal injection execution scene?
Music 101
“Fox on the Run”
This tune even inspired our bus driver to turn it up during my 2rd-grade runs home in 1974. I’m pretty sure that the band Sweet had an amplifier that went to 11. If you don’t love this song, I’m not sure that we can be friends.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wjfZG9UzK7E
“Our next band has undergone a musical metamorPHOses…”
Remote Patrol
UEFA Champions League: Paris-St. Germain at Chelsea
FOX Sports 1 3 p.m.
Eden Hazard of Chelsea….
I love Champions League. I’m just waiting for Eric Shanks at FOX (on the run) to place a heated call to UEFA and ask, “Why the $%&# do you kick off the two games you have at the same time when I’m trying to bleeping’ build an American audience for this bleep and I’d rather run a doubleheader…particularly when it means I have to choose between Chelsea, the top team in the Premier League, and Bayern Munich, the top team in the Bundesliga!?!?” Will you Euros ever figure it out???”
Paris St-Germain and Chelsea drew 1-1 in their first tie.
Yes, I was beginning to think you were moonlighting at both Grantland & SI. 😉 Just like last year, the bb media decided on the MVP BEFORE the All-Star break & no matter how LeBron OUTplayed KD down the stretch, they were dug in. Is this entrenchment mentality related to the male inability (refusal) to ask for DIRECTIONS?
BTW, the other problem with Westbrook’s “candidacy” (besides missing too many games) is that his team is barely hanging on to make the playoffs. Isn’t that some other unwritten rule that the MVP’s team needs to be at least one of the top 3 seeds in each conference?
Anyhoo, did you watch the Cavs pound the Mavs last night? A 33 (THIRTY-THREE) point shellacking. LBJ only had 2 turnovers (whoo-hoo!), 27 pts, 7 rebounds & 8 assists in less than 30 minutes – preetee, preetee good! At least I THINK it was him, the lack of headwear is confoosing me! Actually, I guess it’s kind of funny – LeBron ‘messing with his head’ is messing with OUR heads more!
Meanwhile, the Spurs are finally starting to come on strong. Will be interesting to see the upcoming game against the Cavs. Of course, Timmy may need to sit (elbow) & Pop could always tick off the NBA by sitting his other starters too so it would be useless as playoff-readiness gauge.
And that Bernard was thatclose to death – wow, wonder how it will affect him. Such a tragedy for the French people at any time, but probably even more so after what happened in Paris.
As for Chip Kelly – his trade for Bradford is the one that really has ME stumped. I argued with a guy back when Sam was drafted #1 & I said that he was too brittle & would pan out as a bust # 1. I remember him as a nice guy at OKL, but he missed pretty much his entire final college season & was STILL picked #1. What?! Has he played an actual full season for the Rams over the past 5 years? Plus, the guy is NOT exactly mobile, how will he work in a spread offense? Still, that Chip has all the TV talkers in a tizzy has been the BEST part of free agency.