Starting Five
Hey, JW, aren’t you “Deadspinning” here? Accusing another outlet of covering something not worthy of coverage as a cover to cover it yourself? Brilliant!
1. “When You Wish Upon a Star…”
The Phoenix Suns, paced by Markeiff Morris’ 35 points, outlasted the Cleveland Cavaliers 107-100 last night to improve to 23-18.
No. Try it like this:
The Cleveland Cavaliers continued to show symptoms of dysfunction as they dropped their ninth game of the past 10 at Phoenix. Kevin Love did not play in the fourth quarter and while LeBron James did contribute 33 points, what did he think he was doing attending the College Football Playoff National Championship game one night earlier in Arlington?
ESPN’s “SportsCenter” highlight showed all of one Suns basket.
ESPN.com hed this a.m.: “Cavs Still Straying Off Course.”
Who owns ESPN? Disney. What does Disney know as well as anyone? The importance of creating characters that audiences care about…
I’ll give credit where it’s due: Brian Windhorst did a terrific job on this story.
The Cavs, owners of the NBA’s 14th-best record, have tonight off, then it’s back-to-backs Thursday and Friday night at the Staples Center (Lakers, then Clips), where they will face a massive Windhorst-Markazi double-team. Courage, boys.
2. May Day?
Pound for pound, the greatest pugilist of the 21st century
Promoter Bob Arum tells Yahoo! Sports that his client, Manny Pacquiao, has agreed to a May 2nd bout with Floyd Mayweather. It’s the (non-MMA) fight that fans of the sweet science have wanted for at least half a decade.
Pacquiao, 57-5-2, would get 40% of the gate. He is 36.
Mayweather, 47-0, would get 60% of the gate (plus whatever he wagers on himself). He will be 38.
This would easily be the most lucrative fight in history. Tickets at the MGM Grand would reportedly go for $5,000 at face value. and Mayweather could earn more than $100 million.
3. Gone Girl
That is SO wrong, JW. So wrong….
Reports that Ann Curry is leaving NBC News for good. Bully for you, Ann. You were in that bad marriage too long as it is. They did not appreciate you. I thought the work you did on the Syrian refugees in Jordan was topnotch.
Then again, you are earning $12 million per annum without doing too much heavy lifting. Geez, the money in TV is crazy (If only I were telegenic or had any experience on camera or could write my way out of a paper bag; not that I’d see any purpose of writing my way out of a paper bag, and how big would that bag need to be, any who? I mean….).
Seriously, if Ann Curry is making $12 mil a year, can you imagine what Tina Fey and Amy Poehler are hauling in? No wonder Amy got the new globes. By the way, did you notice that shot she fired across the bow at ex-hubby Will Arnett in relation to Gone Girl? Aaaaaand, we’re back to the top…
4. “107 Bottles of Beer on the Wall, 107 Bottles of Beer…”
Next time he should wear 107
Wade Boggs, a man known for having a rapacious appetite, reportedly told Charlie Day (of It’s Always Sunny with Horrible Bosses, 2 fame) that he once consumed 107 beers in a day. Hey, if Rob Konrad can swim 9 miles in the open ocean on a January night, why not? Chuck Norris stares up at both of you gentlemen in awe…
5. Who? What? When? Where? Why? How?
To my friends at the Paul and Young Ron Morning Show in south Florida. It’s not my role to believe, or to disbelieve, Rob Konrad. I’m not his friend, as you are (and I’m not his adversary). It’s my job to keep asking questions until the facts of his extraordinary ordeal and his survival are unimpeachable. When the person at the center of the tale is the only one with facts available, it is right to be skeptical.
Richard Nixon famously said, “I am NOT a crook.” Oh, well, in that case, let’s stop the investigation (hey, I’m not saying the nation would have been worse off if we had; I’m just trying to demonstrate a point).
For good measure, I invite anyone to visit his/her local 25-yard pool and swim 650 laps without touching the sides (or bottom). If you can replicate 4-foot swells, even better. Of course, the physical trials are only half the equation.
The will to survive, the other half, is a truly powerful thing, particularly in someone who has already demonstrated extraordinary athleticism and fortitude in the past. The question is: What are its limits? And the answer is that almost all of us walking and breathing have never been pushed anywhere near far enough to know.
I do know this, though. My friend Phyllis Reffo, an extraordinary athlete who at age 50 swam on the Pepperdine swim team and does 3-4 mile swims in the Pacific, heard the tale and called it “impossible to believe.”
The acolytes seem to think that because Mr. Konrad spoke in a press conference about his ordeal that there are no questions left to ask. Or that by asking questions, that I am suggesting an ulterior and sinister version. Not true. If it’s as simple as Rob Konrad’s will to live superseded what most humans would be able to endure, bully for him. And I hope next time he wears a life-jacket when he is out fishing alone.
Remote Patrol
Again, nothing really worth watching tonight. Do what I’m doing and bingewatch from start to series finale the emotional thrill ride that was The Courtship of Eddie’s Father….
On those 650 laps, it’s important you give yourself no notice. Don’t get a good night’s sleep, don’t psychologically prepare yourself, just accidentally fall into, say, the hotel pool in the middle of the day and then swim for half a day. Check with management before you add any sharks and/or jellyfish.
Not worthy of coverage? ARE YOU KIDDING? Seriously, do you really believe this? And you work in MEDIA? Let’s see – the team that over HALF the NBA media projected as the NBA CHAMPION before the season began has been self-imploding for the past 5 weeks. Their & the entire sport’s best player/global STAR-celebrity (hey, Mr Freeze – how’s Westbrook & Rose been doing since you deemed them MVP worthy?) had not played most nights at his previous years’ jaw-dropping level & finally admitted that he’d been playing injured ALL season & took a break to rehab/rest his poor, put-upon (but still utterly magnificent) body (ironically spending some of that time in MIAMI for the, er, “heat”) & while he was out, the player YOU actually designated as the BEST on the team only “led” his team to ONE win & eight, count ’em, EIGHT losses (ok, he sat out injured for the 1st couple but still, THIS is the guy you think is the best player on that team?!). So, Homecoming King returns to the line-up last night, rested & rehabbed, & almost single-handedly DRAGS his team to a win & displaying that while his team may still currently be pathetic, he is once again prowling & playing the court like the King he is (& with even more hair!). Come on, this is sport/soap opera/drama combined. It could be the newest addition to the “Shondaland” line-up on ABC! 🙂
Quick – name me the top 3 players on the Hawks, the team that is STILL having trouble filling seats even though they are leading the freaking Eastern Conference.
Meanwhile, the reigning NBA champions, the team that almost every friggin NBA “expert” crowned as one of the “best ever” a mere 8 months ago, is in jeopardy of NOT even MAKING the Playoffs this year & you barely hear about it! I know Kawhi & some of their main bench guys have been injured, but come on, the Heat were never worse than 2nd in the Eastern rankings last year & they were almost daily criticized for not dominating every single game. Why do the Spurs not get trashed by the media? I’ll tell you why – because the only guy ‘on’ that team that is remotely a ‘TV-star’ is the Head Coach & America can only stand watching a crankypants just so much. (Even Dr House is no longer on air).
As for the human Dolphin – was the guy an ocean lifeguard? Was he on the swim team in high school/college? Does he swim at LEAST a mile every day for exercise? If not &/or his name is not Michael Phelps, Ryan Lochte, or other Olympic swimmers, I will go farther than you – I’m not just “skeptical”, I flat-out do not believe the guy swam 9 miles in the ocean after “falling out of a boat”. At night.
For what it is worth, Susie, the Spurs don’t even get media attention when they are winning.
There’s a team called the Spurs?