Starting Five

1. Top Jimmy!

Alabama’s record in the seven seasons before Nick Saban arrived: 46-40

After: three national championships

USC’s record in the seven seasons before Pete Carroll arrived: 46-37-1

After: Two national championships, played for a third.

Notre Dame’s record in the seven seasons before Lou Holtz arrived: 46-32-2

After: One national championship, earned at least one more.

Michigan’s record in the past seven seasons: 46-42

I hear that Michigan is going to “honor” its new coach/alumnus, Jim Harbaugh, with a “Khaki Out” when he makes an appearance at tonight’s home basketball game. Love the effort, but isn’t it a little difficult to see what trousers people are wearing?

Someone said it to me on Twitter last night: Who knows how long Harbaugh will stay, but his demeanor is truly better suited for college athletes? He has the job he was born to do; let’s see if he remains at his Brigadoon.

2. American Sniper

Listen, I know and you know that the Toronto Dinosaurs and the Atlanta Descendants-of-Dinosaurs have the two best records in the East and zzzzzzzz….

But let’s give a little dap to Atlanta’s Kyle Korver. The 11-year veteran, 33, not only has the third-most made threes in the NBA (86), but he is currently draining them at a .515 clip, which is crazy. Korea actually has a higher 3-point % than he does an overall FG % (.492).

The six-foot-seven Creighton alum, who has NEVER made an All-Star team, already holds the NBA record for highest 3-point % in a season (.536), but that was in 2009-10 when he only made a total of 59 for the Utah Jazz.

Doug McDermott, you are staring at your future.

3. Richard Quest Love

I know very little about CNN’s dashing reporter, 52, other than that he’s their designated “Hey, A Plane Went Down Somewhere Near Malaysia, What Does That Mean?” expert, he has my favorite voice, and (perhaps this is the reason) he has quite large incisors.

However, I have since done a little research (read: Wikipedia) and have learned that Quest was born in Liverpool but raised mostly in Australia; has a law degree; is gay and Jewish; spent a year studying at Vanderbilt, though I have no idea why; turned down an opportunity to be a host at Al Jazeera, saying that his being “gay and Jewish” may not be suitable; and, most intriguingly, was arrested at 3:40 a.m. inside Central Park six years ago in possession of crystal meth.

Here he is last month interviewing another one of my favorite humans, Elon Musk, in which Musk admits that he is currently reading a biography on Howard Hughes and is reading it on his iPhone.

4. Tribes

I keep hammering home the concept of TRIBES when it comes to Ferguson, Eric Garner, S-E-C! speed, just about anything. People are so focused on making sure THEIR tribe is in the right that we never move any closer to wisdom. Or justice. I think NYPD commissioner William Bratton said it well at Officer Leo Ramos’ funeral on Saturday:

“The police, the people who are angry at the police, the people who support us but want us to be better, even a madman who assassinated two men because all he could see was two uniforms, even though they were so much more. We don’t see each other. If we can learn to see each other, to see that our cops are people like Officer Ramos and Officer Liu, to see that our communities are filled with people just like them, too. If we can learn to see each other, then when we see each other, we’ll heal. We’ll heal as a department. We’ll heal as a city. We’ll heal as a country.”

The New York Times penned this editorial today. Many will disagree with it. You may, too. I’m on board with it. And not because I don’t respect the police. I do. But it’s as if the police are so entrenched that they refuse to see why anyone might have protested in the first place. Again, thanks a lot, Staten Island D.A. You’re the real villain, here.

5. Sideline (P)ass

Hey, Michael Richardson, what the hell? Not once but twice the Texas A&M student assistant (whose name is nowhere to be found on the official team roster, so why did he occupy such a prominent place on the sideline?) strike West Virginia players as they ended up out of bounds on the Aggie sideline during the Liberty Bowl.

A&M (Assault & Malfeasance) coach Kevin Sumlin did the right thing by telling Richardson to remain in the locker room at halftime once he was informed of Richardson’s  actions (i.e., once he was informed that ESPN’s cameras had caught Richardson doing what he did). We’ll definitely have to save this incident for the Bowlnanza Round-up.

Meanwhile, the Aggies won and Sumlin actually said of their fourth straight bowl win (a first in school history), “This is something no one can take away from us,” but in a sense Richardson has. Because his actions overshadowed the outcome outside Aggieland.

Reserves

My Newsweek “The Year in Sports Media” piece. Read and comment, please!

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Is it just me or do stories involving older women having sex with teenagers (i.e., “minors”) only get media play when the female is a cougar with sharp fangs? Amazing how much play Iris Gibney, 42, garnered for having sex with a 17 year-old high school student. The papers in the U.K. are all in on this tale, too.

Yes, she’s a married mother of three and you can release your inner harrumph! if you like, but if she’s a 260-pounder whose varicose-veined legs that look like a Rand McNally map of Tennessee turned sideways, I doubt we’re hearing as much about it.

Gibney works at the Victoria’s Secret in King of Prussia, Pa., a boutique that may be doing a lot more business this week.

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Logan’s and LeBron’s Run

King James turns 30 today. I wonder what Susie B. got him. The King has a troubled team and an even more troubling hairline. I hope he takes the advice of Taylor Swift: “Shave It Off!”

Remote Patrol

Walking Dead marathon

AMC 9 a.m. —> ?

Zombies are slow-moving, slow-witted creatures that want to suck the life from you. They sound a lot like Twitter trolls. Speaking of having the life sucked out of you, Notre Dame meets LSU in the Music City Bowl (ESPN, 3 p.m.). In their last three road games, after they faced the No. 1 team in the nation, the Irish have allowed 143 points, or an average of 47.66 per game. I wonder if any Irish defensive backs have seen this clip in the past two weeks.