IT’S ALL HAPPENING! 1/30

https://mediumhappi.org/?p=1989

Starting Five

1. A-Rod, A-Roid, A-Void

The New York Yankees are looking into voiding the remainder of Alex Rodriguez’s contract after a Miami New Times story implicates him in PED use. The Yanks could save $114 million over the next five years if that were to happen, although they would need to begin searching for a hitter with the unique talent for sending infield pop-ups to the ionosphere with bases loaded in the ninth inning.

It’s unlikely that the Balmers Bombers will be able to void much, if any, of A-Rod’s deal, which is sad, because I’d love to see them use the money to bring back Wilhelm and Costanza.

As an aside, World’s Cleverest Man Steve Rushin, acknowledging that the story reports that deer antler is a source of testosterone, tweets, “Who has superhuman endurance and easy access to deer antler? Say it ain’t so, Santa.”

2. “Warriors, Come Out and Play-yay!”

Our favorite NBA team, in a post Steve Nash-with-the-Suns planet, is the Golden State Warriors. Last night in Cleveland the Oakland-based squad won their second road game in less than 36 hours, 108-95. The victory is more impressive than it sounds, as starters Stephen Curry, Harrison Barnes and Andrew Bogut all sat out. Feat of Klay Thompson scored a career-high 32 points. Good, young nucleus on this small-market squad. I cannot wait to see how the referees screw them when they face either L.A. team, OKC or San Antonio in the playoffs.

Shooting at the walls of heartache –bang bang!– I am the Warrior!

3. Great editor, great friend and even better human search engine Barry Werner informs us that the Charlotte Checkers of the American Hockey League (AHL) have a defenseman named Michal Jordan. In Charlotte. We are more thrilled with the fact that Jordan hails from the Czech Republic, making him a Czech Checker. In case you wondered, he stands six-foot-one, 195 pounds, so Jordan is no chubby Checker.

4. Do you remember Mamadou Ndiaye? We wrote about the seven-foot-five high school center last January for The Daily. Now a senior at Brethren Christian Academy in Huntington Beach, Calif., Ndiaye is still nonchalantly scoring around 24 points and grabbing 10 boards per game against small-school prep competition. Last night, though, the Senegalese native scored 45 points (on 22 of 26 shooting) and grabbed 15 rebounds in a 76-55 defeat of Oxford Academy.

 

Get used to seeing a little more of UC-Irvine on television next season

Anyway, last November Ndiaye signed a letter of intent with UC-Irvine, which will allow him to remain close to his adoptive parents (who to this point have shielded him from the media). Oddly enough, Ndiaye signed with the Anteaters on the day after they lost by one point in overtime at UCLA, a game that could have been secured as a huge upset for the program if a starter hadn’t missed two free throws in the final 22 seconds of regulation. Of course, signing Ndiaye (Georgetown was a strong contender for his services) may ultimately be the greater upset.

5. We caught a little of the embarrassing banter between Stuart Scott, Merrill Hoge and Trent Dilfer on last night’s ESPN SportsCenter in the wake of the Ray Lewis controversy/nontroversy at media day. In a post-Lance Armstrong-confesses world, the fact that neither Lewis or Ravens GM Ozzie Newsome would go any further than “Ray NEVER tested positive for PEDs” is not a good enough answer to the Sports Illustrated story that alleges he used them after his biceps tear earlier this season.

“Why would Sports Illustrated come out with that story on Tuesday of Super Bowl week?” asked Hoge, a question that should’ve immediately led to NFL doctors administering a CTE scan on him (and, yes, we know that they’re only normally done post-mortem…that’s kind of our point).

If Ray Lewis wants to be insulted by such a question, that’s his prerogative. He’s either telling the truth or he isn’t and professional athletes long ago lost the benefit of the doubt when it comes to PEDs. That Scott, Hoge and Dilfer gave absolutely zero credence to the allegations, that they all failed to address whether there is the potential for truth in the story or even acknowledge that, you know, Lewis isn’t actually a pillar of integrity when it comes to providing substantive answers to accusations, probably gave Bob Ley a migraine.

Scott, who happens to be president of the Stuart Scott Fan Club, in fact turned from the issue and instead informed us that someone had the temerity to ask Lewis a question about passing gas in the Ravens’ locker room. As if that query were as silly and extraneous as the PED question.

Awful, awful journalism, ESPN. Embarrassing, really.

2 thoughts on “IT’S ALL HAPPENING! 1/30

  1. MLB.NFL. Hold on, where is it, gotta jam it on my head (& if I must say, I DO look mahhhvelous in Captain Renault’s hat) – I’m shocked, SHOCKED there is DOPING going on IN HERE!

    Now, where did I put that whistle?!

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