Starting Five

1. One week shy of 23 years after undefeated and top-ranked Notre Dame headed south to face Miami (10-1), the Fighting Irish are finally ranked No. 1 again. Notre Dame rose to the top of the polls after “mushroom-clouding” Wake Forest, 38-0, to move to 11-0. No. 2 Oregon lost in overtime to Stanford and No. 1 Kansas State became the latest victim of the SI cover jinx. The Irish, who also have the top graduation rate in college football (99%), become the first school to be atop both rankings in the BCS era.

The “No. 1” sign is lit up atop Grace Hall on the campus of Notre Dame last night

2. The Hurricanes, by the way, have self-imposed a bowl ban for this season, the second season in a row, tossing yet another sacrificial lamb at the altar of Charles Robinson and the NCAA (who are mutually exclusive, and yet are not). 

3. Speaking of bowl bans, Ohio State is 11-0 and would be ranked no worse than No. 2 in the nation in the BCS right now if only it had chosen to accept its bowl ban LAST season. But, hey, you know, the Buckeyes were in the midst of losing their final three games en route to a 6-6 campaign, so why would you want to squander such a gleaming performance by denying those Luke Fickell era gridders of their just reward. I argued in favor of the Buckeyes taking their lumps last season and was told  to sit down and shut up. Because, after all, what was Urban Meyer going to be able to accomplish in Year One in Columbus? Apparently, a lot.  

4. Get Christie Love. New Jersey governor Chris Christie (already has our vote for 2016) appears on Saturday Night Live’s “Weekend Update” and quotes the chorus of Bruce Springsteen’s “Atlantic City.” By the way, we love the personalized fleece idea. “Hey, is that my fleece?” “Does it have YOUR name on it?” (Is it too early to request a Christmas present fleece that reads “JDubs, Serial Tweeter”?

5. Maryland joins the Big Ten, and Rutgers may soon follow. B1G commissioner Jim Delany would frack the Pope’s water supply if it meant more money for his conference. Some day we will erect a statue to Jim Delany, only that it will be upside down and it will be buried up to its ass.

Reserves

Last week’s Sports Illustrated cover story on Collin Klein by Thomas Lake was titled “27 Things You Need to Know About The Best Player on the Nation’s Best Team.” I was unable to locate the text on-line, but if you have the mag, you may notice the story construction’s resemblence to a 2007 profile of then-USC coach Pete Carroll titled “23 Reasons Why a Profile of Pete Carroll Does Not Appear in This Space.” The author of that piece, which ran in Los Angeles Magazine, is Pulitzer Prize-winning  journalist JR Moehringer. But, hey, 27 and 23 are like, four entire integers apart.

Just so you know… we love Les Miles. Always have. This is the latest reason why. He’s the Huey Long (or Willie Stark for you fans of “All The King’s Men” — and if you are not, you should be) of the SEC. What sets Les’ rants apart from, say, Mike Gundy’s, is that Les is always in control, even when he appears not to be. That “if you’re a girl” parenthetical is priceless.

USC is 7-4 and headed for a date versus the No. 1 Scoring Defense in the nation without its starting quarterback (and presumptive preseason Heisman favorite), Matt Barkley, who is dealing with a sprained or separated shoulder after taking a wicked hit in last Saturday’s ugly, soggy loss to UCLA. Penn State is 7-4 with a chance to finish 8-4 after this weekend’s home date with Wisconsin . The Trojans, No. 1 in the preseason AP poll, have clearly underachieved while the Nittany Lions have clearly overachieved. Observations?

Matt Barkley will never forget the last time he met Anthony Barr

1. Silas Redd took a calculated risk and at this point we’d say he lost. He lost because no matter what any current Nittany Lion will say publicly about their former teammate, deep down they must feel that he abandoned them in a time of crisis for what appeared to be a better opportunity (Does this make USC Paula Broadwell?). When we spoke to Mrs. Redd last summer, we inferred that she was against his transferring (again, this is only our inference). If Redd knew he’d be playing for a school that would do no better than a lower-tier bowl and the price he would pay is the compromised friendships of his former teammates, would he have still done his entire “Grapes of Wrath” exodus?

2. This is what I euphemistically refer to as a “bullshit sports column” by Bill Plaschke of the Los Angeles Times (you should read how I really feel). Why? Well, if you read it you will ascertain that Mr. Plaschke asked Trojan head coach Lane Kiffin about his job status moments after USC loss to crosstown rival UCLA for the first time since 2006. That was the Trojans’ third loss in four games.

So Kiffin tells Plaschke that athletic director Pat Haden has assured him of his job security and invites him to phone Haden to confirm. Plaschke does, and this all happens in a short time span. So let’s invite a few hypotheticals: either Kiffin texts his boss, Haden, to inform him that Plaschke may soon phone re: this issue, or he doesn’t. Either way, when Haden (one of the smartest and, for my money, decent men you’ll ever meet) fields Plaschke’s call, he knows how this will look in the LA media if he is anything less than 100% (Did I say 100%? I meant 150%) supportive of Kiffin.

What’s the upside for Haden to be diffident at this moment? It’s a bullshit sports column because Plaschke made a phone call to an athletic director who has no reason to be candid to him and got his quotes. He made no effort to relate to readers the compromised position in which he put Haden and why any smart administrator would provide exactly this answer. In short, Plaschke’s question was the equivalent to an eight year-old asking, “Are we there yet?” and expecting an actual ETA.

3. I return to it again and again — and again — but the Zen master scene from “Charlie Wilson’s War” packs a lot of wisdom into 2:03. Lots (and lots) of college football observers thought Redd’s exodus to USC was a no-brainer back in July, but they were making this determination based on what they expected the Trojans to be. Maybe the life lesson of the Silas Redd Affair is that you should make decisions based on values as opposed to expected outcomes. You’ll be better off that way.