by John Walters

Starting Five

Crosby’s grandfather, Bing, would be so proud of him. Wait, what?

Split-The-Uprights Citizens Brigade*

The judges will not accept “The Mason-Kicks ‘Em Line”

On a day when all four teams (Green Bay, Dallas, Pittsburgh, Kansas City) 1) showed that it’s still cool to wear the same uniforms you wore in 1970, 2) represented franchises that won Super Bowls in the first 10 years of the game and 3) commemorated the 50th anniversary of the first Super Bowl by having the Packers win and the Chiefs lose, field goals ruled.

Colorado alum Mason Crosby kicked a pair of 50-plus yards in the final two minutes as the Packers outlasted the Cowboys, 31-28. Crosby has now made 23 consecutive postseason field goals, an NFL record. Crosby became the first NFL kicker to connect on a pair of 50-plus yarders (they were 56 and 51 yards, excluding the third he made that was nullified by a timeout) in the final two minutes of a playoff game. And, yes, Dallas’ Dan Bailey made a 52-yarder in between those two to tie the game.

In Kansas City, the biggest “Killer B” for the Steelers was 6’2″, 201-pound Chris Boswell, who set an NFL record with six field goals (in sub-freezing temps, by the way) of 22, 38, 36, 45, 43 and 43 yards in a win that did a lot for kids all over to help learn their three-times table, 18-16. It was the first time in 11 years (Indy) that a team won a playoff game without scoring a touchdown.

2. Six-Ring Circus

The AFC Championship Game in Foxboro, Mass., will pit (Pitt?) Ben Roethlisberger (2 Super Bowl wins) versus Tom Brady (4 Super Bowl wins). There has never been an NFL playoff game between two quarterbacks who’ve won a combined six Super Bowl rings before. We checked. Not assiduously, but we checked.

Your four ring guys, like Brady, include Terry Bradshaw and Joe Montana, who never met in a playoff game. Troy Aikman won three, but he never faced off against Montana. When the Cowboys and Steelers met in Super Bowl XIII, Roger Staubach (your author’s favorite all-time player) and Bradshaw had “only” won a combined four SB’s. Likewise, when Peyton Manning squared off against Brady in last year’s AFC title game, it only was a combined five rings because Peyton was still yet to win his second.

This will be the first six-ring playoff game.

3. Aaron Rodgers: Chico and The Man

We old souls find that Rodgers’ playoff play is similar to Roger’s (Staubach’s, that is)

The Green Bay Packers started 4-6. Since then the Pack are 8-0 and Aaron Rodgers has thrown 21 touchdowns, just one interception (nice pick, Chris Heath) and had zero conversations with his family. The New York Times (which, I haven’t yet checked this morning, may be a “dying’ newspaper or “a pile of trash” ) published a story yesterday backing up a previous Bleacher Report article about the rift between the two-time MVP and his parents back in Chico, Calif., and also his brother, Jordan, who won or lost The Bachelorette, depending on how you score those deals.

Staubach invented the postseason Hail Mary and was the king of “Don’t Give Him Enough Time To Come Back.” He led Dallas to four Super Bowls, winning every one that he didn’t have to play against the Steel Curtain (2)

Regardless, Rodgers’ play this postseason (and in the latter half of the regular season) has been Don’t-wait-for-it LEGENDARY. Yesterday, he was sacked late and by all laws of physics should have fumbled, but he held on. Two plays later he literally drew up the 35-yard pass that would allow Green Bay to kick the game-winner in the huddle, and without benefit of the dirt.

Rodgers hasn’t spoken to his family, reportedly, since he began dating Olivia Munn. We lament that, but a Super Bowl between the two greatest quarterbacks (okay, Peyton, you’re in the conversation) of the past decade, one whose SigOthers are Gisele Bundchen and Olivia Munn just needs to happen, no?

By the way, Rodgers, 33, is six years younger than Brady and grew up 182 miles due north of Brady’s hometown of San Mateo.

4. The Man In The High Tower

It is a week that begins with Martin Luther King Day (he attracted a fairly large crowd on the National Mall once) and ends with the inauguration of Donald J. Trump taking the oath of office at the other end of both the Mall and the spectrum. The Scottish newspaper The Sunday Herald decided to have a little fun with its TV listing of the event. Or maybe it was just hoping to be the subject of a tweet….

By the way, does this guy, “a bush-league fuhrer,” remind you of anyone?

Also, and this is no joke, on Friday TCM will air (5:45 pm.) A Face In The Crowd, a film that came out 60 years ago starring Andy Griffith as “a megalomaniacal TV personality, whose guitar and folksy humor take him from an Arkansas jail to national popularity. The movie offers a satire of television, pop culture and the public fascination with celebrity.”

Your life hack begins in just four days. Are you ready?

5. Un-led Vs. Unleaded

There will come a day when this site is as much of an anachronism as a hitching post…

So, let’s define the term market capitalization. It is, as I understand it, the number of shares of outstanding stock a publicly traded company has times the price of that stock. In short, the total value of that company in the price of its stock times the number of shares.

Now, from 2004 through 2014, do you know what company was consistently ranked No. 1 or No. 2 in market capitalization, or Market Cap? Exxon. Every year for 11 years in a row. Exxon. The company run by Lawrence Tillerson, the presumptive next Secretary of State.

Now, if you look at the ranks of Market Capitalization as of last Friday, here are the top seven companies in the USA by rank: Apple, Google, Microsoft, Berkshire Hathaway, Amazon, Facebook and THEN Exxon. That’s five tech companies, none of which existed before 1980, and one holding company owned by Warren Buffett, all ahead of America’s largest oil company.

Another notable Amazon

If you happen to be a non-coastal, non-elite and believe that voting for Trump will reverse the course of history, you may as well get into your wood-paneled station wagon and head to the drive-in theater. You may hate us coastal elites and our libtard ways, but you are likely reading this on a computer made by Microsoft or Apple, you likely used Amazon to purchase Christmas gifts (or something in your closet), and you will almost certainly be on Google or Facebook today if you haven’t been already.

Trump will bring some jobs back, but he’s not bringing 1975 back. Or 1955. As much as you may want him to. That’s what so much of this discord is all about. But the numbers above don’t lie. There was a time when owning a railroad was the peak of American success (or Boardwalk and Park Place). In the 21st century, the trick is to own a social media platform. Like it or not.

Music 101

Monday Monday

I’m going to make the argument here that Denny Doherty was not only the most underrated member of The Mamas & The Papas, but the most criminally neglected signature voice of the Sixties (and, thirdly, the greatest pop culture figure ever to hail from Halifax). Doherty, who passed away in 2007, sang lead on both this song and the folk group’s other 1966 hit,”California Dreamin'”: two quintessential time-capsule Sixties songs. And he is also the least-discussed member of the group, as he was not one of Chynna Phillips‘ parents (far as we know; Doherty and Michelle Phillips did have an affair in 1965, three years before Chynna was born) and he was not Mama Cass. But what a creamy smooth voice.

This song hit No. 1 in 1966 (that’s like winning Miss California in the Miss USA pageant) and also won a Grammy. I love its mournful mood. Captures the spirit of driving beneath the marine layer on the Pacific Coast Highway.

Remote Patrol

Cavs at Warriors

TNT 8 p.m.

Two of the minimum five future Hall of Famers who will be on the floor this evening….

The Amazing Adventures of Cavaliers and Klay (cont.). So do these two only meet on national holidays now? Recall that the Dubs (34-6) blew a 14-point fourth-quarter lead on Christmas Day to the Cavs (29-10) to lose their fourth straight to the LeBronskis. Should be a fun atmosphere at Oracle. The Cavs are 3-2 on this current road trip.

by John Walters

Starting Five

1. All In The Family-ish

Some good friends of mine—let’s call them Midwestern elites—have been chiding me to tune in to Black-ish for awhile now, but I just have yet to do so. Earlier this week they did a post-election episode that was the closest thing to something from All In The Family I’ve seen since, well, perhaps The Sopranos. 

I can’t pull the clip independently from YouTube, but you can and should watch it on this link. It’s where the male lead, Dre (Anthony Anderson), is admonished by his boss for “not caring” about the outcome of last November’s election. Strong stuff. But I’m sure Clay would burp,  pump out 25 push-ups and cry, “DBAP!”

If you’re looking for a lighter touch, but definitely redolent of a conversation Archie Bunker and George Jefferson might have had in the house on 704 Hauser Street, here’s a funny N-word debate from earlier in the series.

2. Get Real, Madrid

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dw_LNyXHOt8

In the Spy vs. Spy intertwined careers of Lionel Messi and Cristiano Ronaldo (who may wind up being remembered as the two best soccer players ever—sorry, Pele—but who will be No. 1 and who will be No. 2?), Ronaldo has taken the latest advantage. Yesterday Ronaldo’s squad, Real Madrid recorded its 40th unbeaten match in a row, surpassing the La Liga record of 39 set only last year by Messi’s F.C. Barcelona club.

It wasn’t easy. With Ronaldo resting, as this was the second leg of a home-and-home versus Sevilla in the Copa del Rey and Real enjoying a 3-0 advantage after their first match (aggregate goals and all; if you don’t understand, tweet at Paul Carr or Grant Wahl), the team struggled. Real Madrid trailed 3-1 on the road after 80 minutes, but then scored in the 83rd minute and then subbed in superstar Karim Benzema in extra time, on the final kick of the game.

Did it matter all that much in terms of the Copa del Ray or La Liga overall? No, but Ronaldo (again, he sat out) and Messi have been playing this legacy tug-of-war for awhile now.

Real Madrid’s last defeat came last spring to German side Wolfsburg in the Champions League.

3. This Honey Mustered Courage

The young heroine of this story better star in her own McD’s ad soon….

“She had a McNugget in her hand, a gun to her head, and no fear in her heart…”

—Rocco Parascandola, New York Daily News

Where’s Rosco?* He’s out writing hilarious ledes to true-crime, teen-crime stories. This one happened in East Harlem, on 103rd and Third Avenue. Take a bow, sir.

*That’s a familiar catch phrase for a local NYC ad about a bed bug-hunting hound.

4. Want Trump Off Twitter? Easy. Buy It.

I don’t know how you suck things from the outside of something, but I’m no viscous flow expert

I follow @realDonaldTrump on Twitter. And I actually think it’s to everyone’s benefit to have the Prez-Elect on Twitter. You can’t get a man to hang himself if you don’t give him the rope to do so, after all.

But for those of you who’d rather have him off, Vanity Fair–you know, this magazine:

Has anyone looked at the really poor numbers of @VanityFair Magazine. Way down, big trouble, dead! Graydon Carter, no talent, will be out!

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) December 15, 2016

floated an intriguing solution. Simply buy Twitter. They estimate it would cost you about $12 billion to do so and suggested it would be a 21st-century Montezuma’s Revenge of sorts for our neighbors to the south. Don’t wanna pay for the wall? Great. Buy this. And then delete Trump’s account.

Falling In Love, one of a plethora of films in which Streep gave a commanding performance but that no one ever wants to see again

Also this week, People published a transcript of the note Robert De Niro sent Meryl Streep after her Sunday night Golden Globes speech:

Meryl, 

What you said was great. It needed to be said, and you said it beautifully. I have so much respect for you that you did it while the world was celebrating your achievements.

I share your sentiments about punks and bullies. Enough is enough. You, with your elegance and intelligence, have a powerful voice—one that inspires others to speak up as they should so their voices will be heard too. It is so important that we ALL speak up.

We love you,

Bob

5. Hunter Renfrow v. Hunter Renfroe

Renfrow here: Down, but definitely not out.

Who’s your favorite Hunter Renfrow(e)? Is it the former Clemson walk-on wideout, Hunter Renfrow, who caught the game-winning pass in Monday’s national championship game and has four touchdowns and 17 catches against Alabama the past two Januarys (I couldn’t love him more if he were a Domer)?

Renfroe is also on the rise

Or is it the San Diego Padre outfielder, Hunter Renfroe, who got called up to majors in the final two weeks of last season and hit .371 in 13 games with four home runs and 14 RBI? Turns out the latter is a Mississippi lad, a former Mississippi State player, and an “S-E-C!” fan, but still was cheering for his homophone on Monday. And they’ve become buddies through Twitter.

Music 101

This Is Us

Before it was a TV show, it was an mid-tempo duet pairing Dire Straits’ front man Mark Knopfler and one of the loveliest women in music, Emmylou Harris. The song was released in late 2006. I’ve never looked into whether it inspired the NBC series, but it must have, no?

Remote Patrol

Saturday

No. 21 St. Mary’s at No. 5 Gonzaga

10 p.m. ESPN2

Peak WCC rivalry: Olynyk vs. Dellavedova

Hooray for the Catholic schools! There are six Catholic institutions in the Top 25 and none of them are Georgetown (even better, none of them are Boston College). The other four are defending national champion Villanova (3), Creighton (8), Xavier (15) and Notre Dame (20). The Gaels head to Spokane with a 15-1 record and the Zags, of course, are 16-0, the country’s last unbeaten team. This is a great way to settle in on a dark winter’s Saturday night.

by John Walters

I do not know how to put up dry wall. I’m not handy with tools. I am lost under the hood of a car (although I can fix a flat) or under a bathroom sink. I cop to all of it, and I respect people who learn these trades or simply know how to perform these jobs. There is value in what they do, and just because I likely have more book-learning than they do or earned better grades in school does not make me better than they are.

Likewise, not being well-educated does not make someone better-suited to perform jobs that demand an education. The tide of anti-intellectualism that is sweeping the country, the vainglory in being poorly educated or uneducated, is beyond distasteful. It is dangerous.

How can you not know truth if you don’t believe in a virgin mother who gave birth to someone who rose from the dead? What are you, an idiot?

Earlier this week Senator Jeff Sessions, President-Elect Donald Trump’s choice for U.S. Attorney General, was asked flat-out during his ratification hearing, “A secular person has just as good a claim to understanding the truth as a religious person, correct?” 

Sessions’ reply: “Well, I’m not sure.”

This wasn’t a conversation in the men’s room, or in a backroom office. This was televised for America, for the world to see. A man who, by the way is dead-set against radicalized members of another religion, was suggesting that you cannot measure truth as well unless you are religious while aspiring to the highest law enforcement position in the land. Justice is blind, but it carries rosary beads in its pocket.

Donald Trump wants Sessions to be your Attorney General. He wants a climate-change denial dude to head the EPA. He wants as his vice-president a man who ardently believes that homosexuals need to be sent away to be re-trained. As his commissioner on “vaccine safety” a man who does not believe in the safety of vaccines.

Let me be blunt: This is not bad for progressives and liberals. This is bad for everyone inside and outside the United States.

Allow me to introduce you to, if you don’t already know his story, Alan Turing. If you don’t know who Turing was, he was a brilliant British mathematician, a genuine genius, who in 1940 approached the English military and asked to be of service. At the time the Nazis were using an encryption machine, codenamed “Enigma,” that sent coded messages throughout Europe and into the Atlantic to coordinate maneuvers.

The simplest way to explain the Enigma machine: Imagine a typewriter. Now imagine that every key on that typewriter is attached to another typewriter full of keys. Now imagine that every key on those secondary typewriters is attached to yet another typewriter full of keys. Now consider that every day all the Germans would need to do is change the setting of one key on one of those typewriters to change the coded messages they sent.

Solving Enigma seemed virtually impossible. But Turing, who was socially awkward, introverted and, oh yeah, a closeted homosexual, insisted that he be allowed to help. The Brits relented. It’s worth noting here that being gay in Great Britain then was against the law. If word had gotten out that Turing was homosexual, he’d have been thrown in jail.

Fortunately, word did not get out. And after two years Turing, by building what was essentially the world’s first computer, cracked the Enigma code. But then Turing did something just as ingenious: He convinced his military superiors not to simply thwart every German maneuver. Turing saw the long game. He recognized that if the Allies simply used all of their new-found knowledge to undo Axis attacks that the Germans would be on to them and stop using Enigma.

Instead, Turing and his peers developed a calculus of only stopping certain attacks and allowing the Germans to succeed as well. Yes, they could have saved lives right away by stopping attacks on civilian ships, etc., but who knows how many lives that would have cost later on? That sort of long-term thinking takes intelligence and wisdom as well.

(And yes, you can watch The Imitation Game on Netflix right now if you didn’t see it in the theaters and learn most all of this).

The Allies won the war. The Nazis were defeated. Military experts later estimated that the cracking of the Enigma code shortened World War II by two years and saved 14 million lives. Fourteen million lives. That’s like the populations of New York City and Chicago combined.

That’s a pretty significant contribution from someone who, if the law of the day had been properly executed, would have been forbidden to lend his expertise. He’d have been rotting away in jail (If you don’t know how Turing met his end, I’ll spare you, but it wasn’t good and no one even knew of his contributions until 50 years after the war ended; the world owes him a huge thank you and a bigger apology).

The point is, people who are best trained to deal with a problem, be it drywall or an encryption machine, are the ones who should hold those jobs. Not people who simply think the way you do or are looking for the most efficient path to profit.

I’m reminded of another British World War II hero, Winston Churchill, who had been laughed out of office as an old fart and a worry wart in the mid-1930s, only to be called back after the Luftwaffe started flying bombing missions over London. In the mid-1930s Stanley Baldwin had been the Prime Minister and he adamantly refused to listen to Churchill’s repeated attempts to warn the House of Commons that the Germans were amping up their war machine. It was Baldwin and his party who led the  ouster of Churchill out of public life—temporarily.

Unlike Trump, who received at least three military deferments, Chuchill, a fellow child of privilege, volunteered and fought in Cuba, India, Africa twice, and Europe.

Ten years later, in 1947, the war was won, Churchill was a national hero, and Baldwin was turning 80. There was to be a huge birthday party and Churchill was asked to come and speak at it. Never one not to be forthright, Churchill wrote Baldwin a short note that said, and I paraphrase, “I wish you a Happy 80th birthday but I will not attend. I must be honest: it would have been far better for Great Britain if you had never been born.”‘

He was correct, of course. As we stand just one week until inauguration day, I wonder if we’ll all be thinking (or saying) that about the 45th president in a matter of weeks, months, or years. There are serious problems facing the planet, from climate change to the extinction of species, and we have installed as the most powerful man in the world someone who tweets about “Fake News” because he’s butt-hurt about someone trying to compromise his glory.

Intelligence matters. Training matters. Wisdom matters. Alan Turing, even if you completely downgrade his contribution, saved a minimum of 5 million lives. Anti-intellectualism benefits no one. Your grandfather or uncle or dad may have died in World War II if it weren’t for Turing. This is not a game.

by John Walters

Starting Five

Fans “stayed away by the thousands” during the Chargers one and only season in Los Angeles in 1960

La La Palooza*

*The judges will also accept “A Rivers Runs To It” and “(Die)Go Now!”

Finally, an NFL team moving to Los Angeles that originated in Los Angeles. The Rams were originally the Cleveland Rams and the Raiders, who spent a decade or so in L.A. during the ’80s and early ’90s, were originally from Oakland.

Barron, Sid and Frank. “Now that we know where the treasure’s buried, let’s head to the Cafe Trocadero and hang with Lucy and Ricky”

But the San Diego Chargers, who will announce today that they are moving to Los Angeles, actually began there. In 1960 the Los Angeles Chargers opened play in the NFL. Owned by Barron Hilton, whose dad was hotel magnate (and frequent mentor to Donald Draper) Conrad Hilton, the Chargers were coached by Sid Gillman (HOF’er) and had a general manager named Frank Leahy (yes, the same dude who won two national championships as a Notre Dame player, won four more as a Fighting Irish coach, and still owns the second-best winning percentage in college football history; behind his own coach, Knute Rockne).

Those 1960 L.A. Chargers finished 10-4 and you may have heard of Gillman’s two assistant coaches: Al Davis and Chuck Noll.

The Chargers announcement is great news for the San Diego State Aztecs, who finished in the Top 25 (25th in both polls) for the first time in 30 years…

The L.A. Chargers were a very good team, they just couldn’t seem to attract a crowd (That’s cuz everyone had gone surfin’, surfin’ U.S.A.). Their last two home games at the L.A. Coliseum drew 9,000-plus and 11,000-plus. Can you imagine the photos Charger beat writers would have uploaded to Twitter back then with “20 minutes before Titans-Chargers kickoff” attached?

I sincerely hope there isn’t a subliminal message here, though by the fact of me noticing it there cannot be, can there?

Chargers to L.A. Yet another franchise missing the opportunity to become the Billings Bighorns…

2. The (Holy) Trinity Sessions

So this is a disturbing little bit of video from the Senator Jeff Sessions “I Wanna Be Your Attorney General and Latex Salesmen” hearings…

Sessions: “I think we should respect people’s views and, and, not demand any kind of religious test for holding office.”

What’s wrong with that, you ask? Read on.

Senator Sheldon Whitehouse: “And a secular person has just as good a claim to understanding the truth as a religious person, correct?”

Sessions: “Well, I’m not sure…”

See, if you don’t 100% believe that a virgin gave birth to God’s son, who then became the first and only person in history to rise from the dead, how can you be expected to understand what truth is?

(p.s. Why doesn’t Sheldon run for president? I’d never tire of saying, “We need to put a Whitehouse in the White House.”)

3. There Will Be Blood Exxon*

Daniel Day Lewis and Paul Dano in a memorable scene from a rather depressing film

*The judges really believe we should’ve gone “Backing The U.S.S.R” or “Tillerson: The U.S.S.Czar” or “Comradicalization”

Do you remember what Daniel Plainview (Daniel Day-Lewis) did to Eli Sunday (Paul Dano) after the memorable “I Drink Your Milkshake” soliloquy, which was just a giant metaphor for having drilling rights to someone else’s land? That’s right, he murdered him.

To lead off her excellent eponymous MSNBC show last night, Rachel Maddow explained how almost all of the world’s largest oil companies are government-run. Then she noted that the world’s largest oil company not overseen by a government is Exxon. Then she noted that Exxon has 14 MILLION ACRES of land with drilling rights in the USA, which is far more than it has in any other country save one….Russia. Where it has 64 MILLION ACRES of land with drilling rights.

You’ve got the petroleum, I’ve got the drills, let’s make lots of money.

So, EXXON has more land to drill for oil in the USA than anywhere else, except for Russia, where it has FOUR TIMES-plus as much land.

Except for one problem. Exxon has only like one well or two in Russia that operate, because Russia makes money off that well, and the U.S. GOVERNMENT has imposed sanctions on Russia.

To recap: 1) Russia would love Exxon to be able to drill more in Russia and 2) Exxon would love to be able to drill more in Russia.

If it weren’t for those pesky sanctions. And then you remember which American is the only American to have received Russia’s Order of Friendship medal. Oh yeah, Rex Tillerson, the CEO of Exxon. Isn’t he also Donald Trump’s pick for Secretary of State?

Sanctions lifted. Exxon drills. More big oil money. More money for Russia. And if you don’t think a certain Fifth Avenue Billionaire is going to find a way to profit off that, you’re naive enough to have voted for him in the first place.

4. Break Up The Korverliers

“Why do you keep calling me Kevin?”

The Korvs lose 106-92 in Portland, their second defeat in 28 hours. The Korvs trailed by 21 in the fourth quarter, almost inciting LeBron to shave.

Kyle Korver, a career .428 shooter from beyond the arc, is 0-5 in two games from that distance. He’s been diagnosed with KevinLove Sickness.

The Korvs are in the midst of a bizarre six-game road trip that began in Brooklyn, then went directly to Phoenix (Did they catch the A train from the Atlantic Ave. terminal to JFK? That’s what I do), then to Salt Lake City and Portland on a back-to-back. Now they’ve got Sac-Town and finally the Dubs on Monday. Yes, Monday. Don’t ask. Susie B. is already flummoxed and perplexed.

5. Seth Vs. Kellyanne

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U_dv5qAsJMU

A terrific sparring bout between Seth Meyers and Kellyanne Conway, whom I admire for her sheer stamina (and she’s quite proud of those arms, isn’t she?) and willingness to go toe-to-toe with anyone on CNN, MSNBC or CBS. She’s a gamer.

This was from Tuesday night, and I really liked the way Seth called her on her “pivot” while also giving her and the Trump team props where they’ve earned it. Well done. She seemed to enjoy herself, too, though at the end KAC got a little defensive and the fangs were exposed. Which is why Trump loves her.

By the way, notice that this took place on Tuesday night and Conway said that Trump had not been briefed by U.S. intelligence—Seth repeated the question for clarity. But he had. And she knew it. She simply casually lied because who watches late-night TV, anyway?

Reserves

Donald Trump: Life Hack*

*The overworked judges will concede to “Blind Trust Me”

I really am loathe to go all in on yesterday’s circus other than to mention that Trump noted that “Hacking is bad” and then in the next breath said, “But look what we learned from it.” This happened shortly before or after he said something to the effect that “Leaking is bad” but for some reason was unable to find the silver lining in it as he did with hacking. Hmm.

Also, read this to better understand the truth about the Russian spying, the M16 dossier, and how the news was leaked. It almost certainly was not an intelligence leak, as Trump claimed.

Finally, here’s Office of Government Ethics director Walter Shaub spelling it out fairly plainly on Trump’s conflict of interest problems and his “Blind Trust Me” stratagem:

Music 101

Nashville

I got off the Indigo Girls train in the mid-Nineties (after the first listen of “Chicken Man”), but I loved their first four albums and would still happily schlep over to Central Park Summerstage (or the Beacon Theater) to see them. This song off Amy’s and Emily’s 1992 album, Rites of Passage, is one of their gems that never received enough radio play.

Remote Patrol

The Imitation Game

Netflix

also TMC (NOT TCM) 8 p.m.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S5CjKEFb-sM

I finally saw this 2014 film about the life of Alan Turing and how he cracked Enigma, the Nazis’ literal war machine, and I quite fancied it as compared to that year’s Best Picture winner, Birdman. Benedict Cumberbatch is extremely Cumberbatch and Keira Knightley does her thing, too. I love that some day she’ll be made a Dame and we’ll refer to her as Dame Knightley. It also stars Charles “A Lannister Always Pays His Debts” Dance, Mark Strong (like Cumberbatch, a Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy alum) and Charles Goode, who is very…How this film got made without Colin Firth being in it is beyond me.

Was nominated for eight Oscars. MH highly recommends.

by John Walters

Starting Five

44 says farewell

There Goes That Man

Two words that President Barack Obama never uttered during his nearly 50-minute speech? “Donald Trump” (or, for that matter, “golden showers”).

Here are a few things he did say (some as if he were speaking directly to Trump and his cronies):

On overdoing the War on Terror: “Democracy can buckle when we give in to fear. So just as we, as citizens, must remain vigilant against external aggression, we must guard against a weakening of the values that make us who we are.”

On health care: “And I’ve said, and I mean it, anyone can put together a plan that is demonstrably better than the improvements we’ve made to our health care system, that covers as many people at less cost, I will publicly support it. Because that, after all, is why we serve. Not to score points or take credit. But to make people’s lives better.”

This very image bothers some people. Too many people. Sad!

On capitalism run amok: “While the top 1 percent has amassed a bigger share of wealth and income, too many of our families in inner cities and in rural counties have been left behind.” (Editor’s Note: I don’t know why people don’t take this more seriously; we’re headed toward a feudal society)

On Trump-ism, without directly calling it that: “If every economic issue is framed as a struggle between a hardworking white middle class and an undeserving minority, then workers of all shades are going to be left fighting for scraps while the wealthy withdraw further into their private enclaves.”

On the issues that will continually confront Trump: “As my grandmother used to say, reality has a way of catching up to you.”

On immigrants: “For native-born Americans, it means reminding ourselves that the stereotypes about immigrants today were said, almost word for word, about the Irish, and Italians, and Poles, who it was said were going to destroy the fundamental character of America. And as it turned out, America wasn’t weakened by the presence of these newcomers; these newcomers embraced this nation’s creed, and this nation was strengthened.”

On climate change: “Without bolder action, our children won’t have time to debate the existence of climate change. They’ll be busy dealing with its effects… Now we can and should argue about the best approach to solve the problem. But to simply deny the problem not only betrays future generations, it betrays the essential spirit of this country, the essential spirit of innovation and practical problem-solving that guided our founders.”

I seem to recognize his face. Yup, Eddie was there thinking, Can’t find a better man…

On a fact the GOP hates to admit is true: “No foreign terrorist organization has successfully planned and executed an attack on our homeland these past eight years.”

On social media: “If you’re tired of arguing with strangers on the Internet, try talking with one of them in real life.”

A quick anecdote. The day after Obama was elected, I was at my favorite neighborhood restaurant, La Caridad. Two black men were waiting for a to-go order and the first said, “Can you believe he won?” to which the second said, “Now how long until they kill him?”

It’s a relief and a mild surprise that the first African-American president not only survived four years in office, but eight. That he did so with his dignity and integrity intact, without a whisper of scandal, well, that must just destroy the racists who are so eager to see him depart. He did it, though. If he didn’t exactly win the Indy 500 in terms of every policy, remember that he spent eight years driving the car with Mitch McConnell pressing down on the emergency brake. More than a great man, he was a good and decent man. We’ll not see his like in the White House for at least four more years. Most likely longer. Speaking of which…

2. Golden Taint

From Newsweek…

The story began making the rounds at Washington dinner parties late last summer: Donald Trump had been caught in a compromising sexual position by Russian intelligence agents during a business trip to Moscow. 

According to one version, told by a high-ranking Obama administration diplomat, Russian intelligence services, acting on Trump’s well-known obsession with sex, had arranged an evening for him with a bevy of hookers, with hidden cameras and microphones recording all the action. The jaw-dropping detail that topped the story? Trump had somehow engaged in “golden showers,” sex acts involving urine. 

Now, according to a leaked annex to the combined U.S. intelligence agencies’ report on Kremlin intrigues in the American elections, Russian security agents watched Trump engaging in “perverted sexual acts” that were “arranged/monitored by the FSB,” the Kremlin’s leading spy agency. The FSB, it said, “employed a number of  prostitutes to perform a golden showers (urination) show in front of him.” Not only that, according to the report’s anonymous Russian sources, Trump deliberately chose for his escapade “the Ritz Carlton hotel, where he knew President and Mrs. Obama (whom he hated) had stayed on one of their official trips to Russia and defiling the bed where they had slept.”

Intelligence agencies should never have allowed this fake news to “leak” into the public. One last shot at me.Are we living in Nazi Germany?

— Donald J. Trump (@realDonaldTrump) January 11, 2017

Now, let’s look at Donald Trump’s SEVEN tweets since this came out (originally reported last night by Buzzfeed). Notice that he never denies any of this directly. Instead, he just says “Fake News!” or “Witch Hunt!” or that he’s never been to Prague, which isn’t Moscow, but whatevs. This is the same man who for years pushed lies that Obama was born outside the U.S. and who also claimed that Ted Cruz’s padre was involved in the JFK assassination. Now he’s asking if we’re living in “Nazi Germany” because he for once is on the other end of it.

3. Angela’s Assets

By the way, Angela is about as nice and sweet a person as you could ever hope to meet. Couldn’t be happier for her big moment.

If you’ve seen La La Land, allow me to introduce you to Angela Parrish, the musician who actually sings the female vocals on the opening number, “Another Day of Sun.” The reason we love Angela is because her personal story mirrors that of both leads in the film (she actually plays jazz piano six nights per week at two different restaurants; sound like anyone familiar?).

The scene was shot six months before she ever was hired to lay down the vocals for the track, by the way.

4. The James Gang

I love Russell Westbrook as much as any of y’all, but James Harden is your indisputable first-half MVP

James Harden last night: 40 points, 15 rebounds and 10 assists. The Rockets launch nearly 50% of their shots from beyond the arc and win to move to 31-9. They’re basically on pace to finish 64-18 and no one’s saying it, but Mike D’Antoni’s “Seven Seconds or Less” offense is alive and well deep in the heart of Texas.

Also: Cleveland lost 100-92 at Utah. Bizarrely, LeBron James is 5-9 all-time in Salt Lake City (some notes are added simply to chide Susie B. into commenting).

5. Bono-roo?

Last week, it was Coachella (April), with headliners Radiohead, Beyonce and Kendrick Lamar.

This week: U2 announced it will be playing The Joshua Tree in its entirety on tour this summer (Why not just reach into my savings account, Bono, and take what you like?). Probably my favorite album, so yeah, you got me, Dubliners.

Bonnaroo (June): U2, Red Hot Chili Peppers, The Weeknd.

BottleRock (in Napa Valley, in late May ): Tom Petty, Foo Fighters, Maroon 5.

Not a bad spring and summer of music.

Music 101

Girlfriend In A Coma

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qT4_BQFbCQQ

Thank God for The Smiths. Are there any artists around now who are as clever, dark and still melodic as Morrissey and his mates were? Okay, sure, a few hip-hop artists, but Phyllis can’t listen to that. This song reached No. 13 on the UK charts in 1987. Never charted in the US, but was popular in Dillon Hall in the fall of ’87.

Remote Patrol

Psycho

TCM 8 p.m.

This is not only Alfred Hitchcock’s masterpiece, it’s also his comeback hit (if you haven’t seen the film Hitchcock, it tells the backstory and has ScarJo plus Mrs. Timberlake, so what are you waiting for?). I like that the 1960 film starts in Phoenix with a female embezzler who decides to go on the run. I always imagine the Bates Motel being located somewhere between Blythe and L.A.