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Patriot Gone
Tom Brady decides to deliver sobering news to Bostonians on St. Patrick’s Day: he’s now officially a free agent. Brady, 42, has been with the Pats since 2000, leading them to nine Super Bowls, winning six. A career like no other.
It probably won’t happen, but Tom Brady to the Chicago Bears would be awesome.
Spring Breakers
Beaches in south Florida remain packed during spring break, despite all the social distancing warnings. Two reasons: 1) Florida has the type of politicians who are only concerned with the tourism dollars and 2) deep down, or maybe on the surface, the youths realize that they’re not going to be felled by the coronavirus.
Let’s be sinister for a moment. If you have a viral disease that kills less than 1/10th of one percent of Americans in their working prime or teens but kills nearer to 10% of Americans who are five to ten years past their final productive years… this is like a purging of the Social Security and Medicare class. Imagine if our leaders were not as understanding and compassionate as Max Brooks, above. Imagine if they said, You know what, this disease is bad but our economy tanking is worse. Everyone go back to work. There’ll be some deaths and that’s bad and all, but it’s only going to be gramps and granny.
Now, imagine if they did not actually say that, but instead only took steps (or failed to take steps) that assured the same outcome. Which is what they’re doing.
Jim Cramer on CNBC just now: “We may be sacrificing the economy for the sake of people between the ages of 70 and 90.” That’s sort of true. It’s sort of curious that people are asking if it’s worth the sacrifice. RIP your gramps!
Peloton Center
Things I’d be doing if I produced SportsCenter: 1) Nightly reports on the top 10 Peloton finishers of the day. I’m not exactly sure how Peloton works, but I believe your time can be ranked versus everyone else on Peloton at the time, or that day, or whatevs. Why not show America the winners? 2) Iditarod live reports. It’s an American institution, dating back to 1973; it’s in a remote and exotic (but not warm) American location, and it’s actually taking place right now, and
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3) Figuring out what type of events you can create yourselves, hopefully with the help of federal officials, that are social-distance friendly. I’d go for a Gumball Rally (Google the film) type event, a cross-country car (or bicycle) race.
“Try Getting It Yourselves”
Add this quote to the numerous profane things the President has uttered since the coronavirus became a thing. On a conference call with American governors yesterday, Donald Trump told them that as far as badly needed ventilators go, “We’re backing you, but try getting it yourselves.”
Here’s what I imagine might be happening in the Oval Office when Dr. Fauci leaves the room. You’ve got Jared Kushner and Stephen Miller whispering in the President’s ear. And maybe, just maybe, they’re telling him that if people cannot be tested, then those people do not technically have COVID-19. And if those people, almost always older people, happen to die before being diagnosed, who’s to say that it wasn’t emphysema or Parkinson’s or dementia or whatever ailment they’d been flirting with for awhile? The important thing, as far as his reelection goes, is that the diagnosis and deaths are down.
Do you really believe, knowing what we know about Kushner and Miller, that they are more concerned with saving lives than with saving his presidency? I don’t. I believe they are the firemen heading to the fire but stopping for red lights and stopping to the Chick Fil-A drive-thru on their way over. Because you can’t get nailed for exponential increase in numbers of coronavirus if people don’t actually get tested for them.
Meanwhile, as this story shows, the World Health Organization had 100s of thousands of test kits, manufactured in Germany, that they were ready to ship to the U.S. We said, No thanks, our CDC will do it. And then the CDC screwed the pooch. We’ll never know how many lives that delay, upwards of a month, cost America. But it did. And none of those deaths are going to go on the “Died of Coronavirus” roll.
He likes to keep the numbers down.
Two words: West Virginia. I’ve been to West Virginia, and maybe you have, too. And in terms of social distancing, WV has been social distancing itself from the rest of the Lower 48 for centuries. Still, not a single diagnosis? C’mon.
Chicago Pope
So I went on the HBO and the Netflix streaming services Sunday and here’s my question: When did popes become so popular? The Two Popes (on Netflix), The New Pope (HBO) and The Young Pope (also HBO). What’s up with this papacy obsession?
I consulted MH’s unofficial Culture Editor (and Editor In Charge Of Licking The Spatula During All Baking Exercises), Katie McCollow, who suggested that poping is the most popular TV franchise since NBC’s spate of Chicago-based shows. And it was about 1.8 seconds later when we both decided that either NBC or HBO or both needs to release Chicago Pope. He’s a gruff Irish Catholic who operates the worldwide Catholic church out of a firehouse in Lincoln Park, although he’s actually more of a White Sox fan. Eventually he is induced to also run for mayor. You’d watch. So would I.
West Virginia not having any coronavirus cases calls to mind this West Wing exchange:
Bartlet: Sweden has a 100% literacy rate, Leo. 100%! How do they do that?
Leo: Well, maybe they don’t and they also can’t count.
WV : er, perhaps OPIOID ADDICTION immunizes one from COVID-19? More likely it’s because WV makes Alabama look like a wealthy & sophisticated culture. WV is poor, it has the worst public schools in the country but the only thing I know about their “healthcare structure” is that this is the state that had “drive-through” pharmacies selling MILLIONS of opioid pills in areas where the local population numbered in 4 figures.
As for killing off the elderly (AKA the recipients of “entitlements”), um, this isn’t that far off from YOUR idea of letting them fend for themselves! Of course, WHY Trump & his minions want this, I can’t fathom since the MAJORITY of his “base” are these very folks. BTW, if that HEINOUS “payroll tax cut” actually gets passed in Congress, we can all say GOODBYE to Social Security. If I was a Fox News viewer (i.e. brain injured) & believed in “conspiracies”, I’d say this virus was cooked up here in the good ole USA just to kill offl the number of “entitlement users” AND Social Security itself!
Speaking of Fox “News”, it seems they’ve abandoned “it’s a Democrat hoax!” & moved straight to praising the Sociopath in his “handling” of this national emergency. (!^#$!%#) Do you think this was because of the abrupt change in ‘message’ by the WH or because all their viewers must have been wondering why ALL the schools, sporting & other public events, plus now restaurants, bars, gyms, movie theaters,etc are all now CLOSED. Either the Democrats are uber-powerful (not a good tactic in election year!) or Fox had to start admitting the truth.
ESPN game-ified shows I would watch?Smokey and the Bandit, Cannonball Run, and Around the World in 80 Days.
To your ”firemen heading to the fire but stopping for red lights and stopping to the Chick Fil-A drive-thru” comment, check out the lyrics to Harry Chapin’s ” what made America Famous.” Eerily similar.