by John Walters

Starting Five

1. Joel To The Hole

Of course, of course the NBA is going to want TNT to air a game between the Cavs and Warriors, who this spring could become the first two teams in NBA history to meet in three consecutive NBA Finals. And, sure, they wanted to hire Thunder-Clippers because the Clips will become the team with the most endorsement deals to never make the Finals.

What they should’ve done, though, is move Cavs-Warriors to 10:30 p.m.—still only 7:30 p.m. out west—and air Sixers-Bucks, because these are the two most entertaining young teams in the the league. Joel Embiid. Giannis Antetokounmpo (the steal of the 2013 NBA draft, taken 15th; Anthony Bennett was selected first). Dunks galore.

 

Do you realize that the Sixers are 6-4 in their past 10 games and that’s while observing their tradition of not having their No. 1 overall drat pick even playing for them? Ben Simmons still has yet to suit up.

Embiid was the 3rd overall pick in the 2014 draft, but due to injuries is making his debut this season. He’s averaging 19.7 ppg and 7.7 rpg and is having as much fun as anyone in the NBA. Jahlil Okafor, the 3rd overall pick last season, has been All-Meh team for Philly. But wait until Simmons joins this cast. The Sixers, who won last night to improve to 13-26, have already won three more games than last season. They haven’t won 20 games in a season since 2013 and haven’t finished above .500 (that’ll be tough, but possible) since 2005

Giannis is averaging 23.4 and 8.6 and oughta be selected to the East All-Star team if there’s a (Greek) god. The Bucks are 20-20 and in eighth place in the East. But like Philly, better days are on the way.

2. Locker Room Talk

As you know by now, in the wake of Pittsburgh’s 18-16 win Sunday evening in Kansas City, Antonio Brown posted 17 minutes of the Steelers’ locker room scene to Facebook Live. Every sports blog oughta send Brown a bouquet of chocolate roses (Deadspin‘s write-up actually began, “Bless Antonio Brown…”

Inadvertently, Brown caught coach Mike Tomlin saying the following, which really isn’t even that bad, about their upcoming opponents, the Patriots:

“Let’s start our preparations. We just spotted these assholes a day and a half. They played yesterday. Our game got moved to tonight. We’re going to touch down at 4:00 in the f***ing morning. So be it. We’ll be ready for their ass. But you ain’t got to tell them we’re coming.”

Bill Belichick will get over it. I’m not sure that Phyllis will, but Belichick will.

3. To Stay Home Or Go?

On Friday Donald J. Trump will be sworn in as this nation’s 45th president (you may have heard), providing parents coast-to-coast with the opportunity to explain the meaning of the word “nadir” to their kids.

Beyond that, more than 40 Democratic Congressmen have pledged not to attend the ceremony. I’m a little torn on this and I’d like your help. I’m no fan of Trump (NO! C’MON!) nor am I a Dem or GOP’er, but he did win the election and even if you think Russia played some dirty games along the way, Putin didn’t actually pull the lever from anyone. Trump won. Fair (by the Electoral College) and square. You respect the outcome, even if Russia may have meddled.

By not attending, you can argue, lawmakers are being petty and not offering Trump the same fresh start, clean state as he takes office that they were so bent out-of-shape about the 44th president not receiving.

On the other hand, when you get past Trump’ s Insult-Per-Day Twitter style (and that doesn’t bother me so much), here’s a man who spent five years brazenly trying to humiliate his predecessor with the birther movement. A ploy, by the way, which is a major reason for why he got elected. No one who will move into the White House has ever publicly shown more contempt for a sitting president, so what has he done to earn the respect usually associated with that office?

 

Rep. Lewis. You are a great person. But Dr. King didn’t give in to his anger or his hurt. That is how he accomplished & won Civil Rights.

— Rob Schneider (@RobSchneider) January 16, 2017

Oh, Rob!

I’d never tell a John Lewis or any other legislator what he or she should do (especially if they’re a minority), I’m no Rob Schneider (“Making copies!”). It’s just that this one has me flummoxed.

Trump is going to give everyone enough opportunities to defy him from moves he makes starting Friday. I think my feeling is I’d wait until next week to demonstrate against him. Let him soil his own bed. Don’t give him an excuse to say that everyone was against him and never gave him a fair chance (though his predecessor rarely whined about being openly defied simply because of the color of his skin).

Your thoughts?

4. Cadaverliers

Golden State 126, Cleveland 91.

Kevin Love goes for three points and three rebounds in 16 minutes and might I remind you that he was considered the star of that UCLA team that also had Russell Westbrook.

The Cavs were on the final game of a six-game road trip that began in Brooklyn of all places and then did Mountain Time (Phoenix and Salt Lake City) before three games on the coast. Man, I can’t wait for the NBA to put a franchise in Las Vegas. Either can most NBA players.

Anyway, other than the Dubs ending a four-game losing streak to the LeBronskis, it was pretty meaningless. Although LeBron may have suffered a bruised beard (no relation to Butch Beard) on that foul from Draymond Green in the first half.

5. Dinosaur, Jr.

This is the “Humpback of Circle B,” a massive alligator spotted in Lakeland, Florida, the other day. God bless. Now, please, nobody go all Duck Dynasty on this beautiful creature. If he got that large without eating any humans, he probably isn’t about to start now (maybe the odd Golden retriever or two, but hey…). Besides, given the way Floridians make news, would a reduction in them be all that awful?

Word Up

Desultory (adj.) lacking a plan, purpose, or enthusiasm

After years of providing passionate insight, Jon Gruden put in another desultory effort alongside Sean McDonough in the Monday Night Football booth.

Music 101

Sunday Morning Comin’ Down*

Kris Kristofferson must wonder what he has to do. He has written some of the best songs in country music, including this one and “Me and Bobby McGee”, and he was a handsome feller’ in his day, but the artists who performed his tunes already had better luck with them. This version by Johnny Cash rose to No. 1 on the country charts and was named Country Song of the Year in 1970.

*This one’s dedicated to you, A.J.

Remote Patrol

Charlie Wilson’s War

HBO Now

The beauty of this above scene is that it’s Gust’s (Hoffman’s) first line in the entire film. This is how we meet him.

This wasn’t even nominate for Best Picture from the field of 2007 films, which in retrospect seems a heinous crime. The winner was No Country For Old Men (no argument there), but this film starring Tom Hanks, Philip Seymour Hoffman and Julia Roberts, with Amy Adams, Ned Beatty, John Slattery (still blond) and a va-va-voom Emily Blunt in supporting roles, written by Aaron Sorkin and directed by Mike Nichols, is outstanding. Over-hyped films such as Atonement, There Will Be Blood and Juno go much more love that year, and my guess is because in part America wasn’t ready to watch a movie telling us that we made a fatal mistake by taking our eyes off the ball in Afghanistan.

But the script is as good as Sorkin has ever written—he only goes about 75% Sorkin. It’s hilarious and a treat, while telling a story that is every bit as fascinating as Argo would later be. These actors, Hanks included, have never been better. It’s a shame that it was so unappreciated when it was released.