This is the Bugs I remember from “Wabbit Twouble” and “The Hare-Brained Hypnotist”

1. What’s Up, Doc?

Hare Restoration*
(that headline, submitted by Greg Auman, is just so much better)

On Monday international film star Bugs Bunny arrived at an awards event in Hollywood (he could’ve been at Pismo Beach!) looking nothing like his former self. Pundits, bloggers and media who were there on the red carpet could not help but notice the radical transformations in Bugs’ face.

True, Bugs has not appeared in films since promoting the release of Space Jam in 1996, but really, do we believe this was just the natural aging process? Bugs was coy about his radically altered face, saying, “Myehhh, I’m glad people think I look different, Doc. It’s a product of my happier, healthier life. Also, it’s not wabbit season.”

Here’s the thing, people: put aside the vapid celebrity gossip shows or tabloids. They’re always going to be moronic. For the average person to not notice and perhaps even remark on the fact that a world-wide celebrity, one whose face IS Bugs’ brand, has changed so much that one no longer even recognizes him, is not a crime. Nor should it be condemned or be an excuse for some (usually female) columnist to chastise us for demanding rabbits to conform to unrealistic standards of beauty.

Points:

1) It’s usually middle-aged, female editors who run the very magazines that promote those unrealistic, air-brushed images of lollipop dolls with big boobs.

Cosmo editor Joanna Coles with cover model Emily Ratajkowski earlier this week.

2) If Bugs Bunny had just said, Yeah, I had plastic facial surgery instead of playing coy, it would have ended the matter.

3) Bugs can do whatever he wants to his face; and human beings, who notice things, are allowed to notice it.

4) The hidden issue here? What is inferred with plastic surgery. If Elmer Fudd –or Belinda Carlisle–were to lose a lot of weight through proper diet and exercise, the women’s gabfest talk shows would publicly praise him. He might even get a People magazine cover. That, too, is a radical alteration of one’s appearance. But this is different. Because, like it or not, it implies that Bugs wasn’t comfortable with his appearance; that perhaps he was insecure. Which is a sign of weakness or instability. Which people find unattractive.

The Go Go’s extra adipose was Gone Gone by the time this photo was taken

5) Here’s Russell Brand, whom I love, remarking on Bugs’ facial modification and the hysteria. While he’s correct, perhaps, to pillory all the vapid rubes discussing Bugs, his use of non-human entities (apple, polar ice caps and Baghdad) (6:44)to illustrated how things change over the course of 10 years (“time has an impact on matter”) is irrelevant. The only example that applies is another human face. And Brand threw in his because he knew a halfway intelligent (I’m a third of the way) person would point that out. But did you notice that when Brand showed a photo of himself from 10 years ago that it was obvious that, well, it was Russell Brand? Maybe he should’ve shown fat and skinny Jonah Hill instead?

2. Kobe’s Back/Steve’s Back/LA’s Back-Court

A recent preseason game may be the last we see of this duo

It appears that we’ve seen the last of the Lakers’ Hall of Fame back court of two-time NBA MVP Steve Nash and one-time NBA MVP (but five-time world champion) Kobe Bryant. Nash’s lingering back issues will mean that the listed-at-six-foot-three (but more like 6-1 1/2) point guard will miss the entire 2104-2015 season. Nash would be 41 when he returns; if he returns.

So now we’ll get to see a lot more of Kobe and Jeremy Lin, which could be fun, actually.

As for our Canadian friend,  there’s a melancholia knowing that one of the league’s best people, arguably its most selfless player and a true leader, will retire never even having had a taste of an NBA Finals. Nash will go down not only as one of the best teammates and smartest men to ever play in the NBA as well as one of its most unlikely success stories, but he should also be remembered as the greatest NBA player to never appear in an NBA Finals. Nash led the league in assists six different seasons (not including the year in which he had his most assists, 898, in 2007-08), was the quarterback of those wildly entertaining “Seven Seconds or Less” Phoenix Suns teams, and I believe will retire having come as close as anyone in NBA history to achieve a .40-.50-.90 (40% from beyond the arc, 50% in field goals, 90% from the line; Nash’s numbers are 42.8%, 49% and 90.4%).

He’s also No. 3 all-time in Assist (10,335), just one ahead of Mark Jackson, which just has to kill Mark Jackson (that’s what you get for passing the ball to Gerald Wilkins).

Nash also imagined and directed what may be the coolest video in NBA history…

3. Sergeant-At-Armed

Cirillo loved and rescued pooches, which makes him even cooler to us than if he were just Canadian (which is usually cool enough in itself.)

The 24 year-old Canadian reserved solider, Nathan Cirillo, who was shot and killed on Wednesday while guarding the Tomb of the Unknown Soldier was carrying a rifle. But only for ceremonial purposes. Those weapons contain no rounds of ammunition, which rendered Cirillo helpless when the stupid gunman attacked (I imagine I could have come up with something more inflammatory and vulgar than “stupid gunman,” but you get the point).

Vickers, moments after firing the three shots that killed the gunman

However, the 58 year-old Sergeant-at-Arms, Kevin Vickers (is there a vicar named Kevin Sergeant-at-Arms? This is what keeps me up at night…this and old episodes of The Newsroom). was toting a pistol and probably saved a few lives by shooting the gunman dead in the halls of Parliament. Good shot, too, since the gunman was wearing body armor.

Vickers, deservedly, got a standing ovation in the House of Commons yesterday in Ottawa. And that’s great. But maybe if you’re going to ask a young man to don a uniform and carry a rifle, to be both a symbol of military security and to be a target, maybe you give him some ammunition. Next time.

4. Mulch Ado About Nothing?

Would you punch these guys?

(The judges will also accept Greg Auman’s “Taxi Squad Confessions,” but only because it’s better)

The Denver Broncos cut safety John Boyett, a member of the team’s taxi squad, after he punched a taxi driver (after having been sent home from a bar for threatening a bartender) and then hid in a pile of mulch from the police. Medium Happy’s crack legal team has investigated the matter and learned that there is nothing overtly illegal about concealing oneself in a pile of leaves–particularly if one is taking part in The Hunger Games.

“Goodnight, John Boyett.” “Goodnight, Mary Ellenett.” “Goodnight, Grampa-ett.”

The Broncos were the second team to cut Boyett, a former Oregon Duck, after an intoxicated encounter with the police. Last year he had a similar run-in with police in Indianapolis Colts, at which time he told them, “You can’t arrest me; I’m a Colt.” (Or was that Jim Irsay?). They did and Boyett was released the next day.

Meanwhile, earlier this week Robert Klemko, a writer for SI and MMQB who not only punched a cabby but commandeered his vehicle, was arrested. SI has suspended him for four weeks. So the NFL is tougher on cabby assault than Sports Illustrated? Got it.

5. Pride Rock

(The judges will also accept “Girls on Film”)

Do these guys know they have a game versus the Falcons on Sunday at Wembley?

This photo earned Mike Nichols (not the dad of Rachel Nichols, but wouldn’t that have been cool?) the Wildlife Photographer of the Year award. The lions are slumbering on a rock outcropping on the Serengeti Plain –at first look, at least to me, it appeared to be an ocean in the background, but it’s just an ocean of plains.

Bad news? Two of these females were killed not long afterward when they ventured onto land outside of the park (Rule No. 9: When it comes to animals, too many people suck.)

STARTING FIVE

In our continuing “Contributors More Talented Than The Imperial Poobah” series, here’s Gene, Gene the Blogging Machine, a.ka. @Okerland, a.ka. is a palindrome. Anyway, I’ll be back tomorrow with plenty to say about Renee Zellweger’s about-face face…. J.W.

1. Ref-erendum: Stick Together

She’ll call you for an Offensive Pass

Four days later and “The Pick” is still being discussed (not to be confused with Seinfeld’s The Pick, he just had an itch).  Thanks to different angles, the country is split on this. At this point, my anger has subsided and my viewpoint is this: The ref was told to look for it, he did, he saw it, he called it.  The call becomes moot if ND can’t win out since I don’t think a 1-loss ND team to someone other than FSU gets in.

But I do have issues with how the ACC handled the explanation.

Here is the Director of Officials explaining the call.

Note he never breaks down the play, he just explains what was called and why it was called. He essentially read the rule book.  I have a feeling that Doug didn’t agree with the call or had no idea who the call was on, and didn’t want to make the ref look foolish in front of a screen.

As much crap as Mike Pereira gets, he always uses video evidence to illustrate his point. I think the ACC dropped the ball here but someone had to explain why that flag was thrown.

To complicate matters, they’ve switched who the call was on again and said they missed a removed helmet call.  That’s not going to incite the Irish fans even more, is it?

BTW, the missed helmet call is big but I can give a pass since with all the confusion, the ND sideline had no chance to point it out and I have no idea how long the kid kept his helmet off.

Lastly, we will see how the ACC punishes this crew by what games they work the rest of the year.  Conferences can’t defend a call and then bash officials, they just move them to a lower profile game.

2. Think Blue

We’re two weeks away from Breast Cancer Awareness Month ending and thus no more pink uniforms in football. The reasoning for the pink uniforms was not only to bring awareness but to get the female demographic to watch the NFL.

Women’s sports will do Pink themed games too, but in an effort to attract more male viewers why not a Blue or Purple themed game?  What’s the worst that could happen, attendance doesn’t change?

3. Best of 5

A moose-take for whomever sits behind him?

Two games into the Fall Classic (if the ratings get any lower, eventually it will be shown live on ESPN Classic) and we’re knotted at 1.  The Royals had won 11 straight playoff games and the Giants had won 15 of 17 postseason games entering Tuesday night.  The last time the Giants lost a game where either team could be eliminated was 2003.

Both teams did what the media wondered: “Could the Royals bounce back from a loss?” and “Could the Giants lose a World Series game?” The answer to both was yes.

I didn’t expect any high scoring games  but we’ve had two thus far.  And Game 2 showed that if the Giants can’t take the lead before the 7th, the Royals lock down bullpen will more than likely keep them off the board.

My heart says the Royals will win, but unless they are bathing in garlic and holding silver bullets (Billy Butler did win a Silver Slugger award in 2012 though), I can’t see the Giants losing this Series.

Biggest storyline in SF: Why Timmy (Lincecum) didn’t pitch in Game 1? (Members of the media fought on twitter) and Timmy’s health after stellar Game 2 performance.

Fact that may only interest me: The Giants get a split in KC, they are guaranteed to play all their home playoff dates. Talk about a sweet revenue.

Possible game 5 prop bet: What’s higher: (Madison) Bumgarner K’s or celebratory beers?

4. What is Reality?

I’m a fan of Reality TV but not real housewives, the Kardashians or stuff like that.  I like the fixer up shows: Bar Rescue, Restaurant Impossible, Love it or List it.

The problem with these shows is that after they become more mainstream, the show changes from being entertaining to the star trying to live up to expectations. Take Bar Rescue for example.  The show now follows a format: crappy bar shows how crappy they are, Jon Taffer comes in and mugs for camera, yells Shut it Down and goes berzerk to show he means business. They do a stress test (when is the last time 100 people walked into a bar at the same time) which further proves they are incompetent but thanks to Taffer’s hard work and remodeling the place becomes a success again.

He’s had a decent success rate, but there’s a reason these places called Taffer: they don’t know how to run a business so they will be successful for a first few months after the remodeling but then things revert back to normal.

I also think some bar owners go on the show to keep a free remodeling and publicity and I am shocked how these people go in so much debt.

Two reality secrets:

1. Taffer has the theme before he arrives on the scene.
2. The Love it or List it Producers film both reactions and chose the decision they like best for tv.

btw, what’s the deal with the Property Brothers?  why do they still live together? 

5. You’ve Got Mail

#TBT to the 90s

Like most sports fans I’m superstitious, during the the 2012 title run I wore the same clothes each week. I even wore them to the game (they didn’t help). During the Pitt game, I sat in the same catcher stance for the 4th Q and OT (It worked!).

One of the people in my neighborhood has an ND mailbox, ND flag and ND license plate. I’ve never met the people there but before the Michigan game this year i left a note in the mailbox “MICHIGAN SUCKS”. ND won and each week since then I’ve left a note about Michigan sucking for fear that not leaving a note would result in a ND loss.

Well I left a note last Friday but thanks to the Back Judge, ND lost and thus the letter is not a key to ND victory.  So I ask the loyal MH readers two questions:

1. Do I keep leaving notes?
2. Do I finally reveal that I’ve been leaving notes?

Need a last minute costume idea?

Put on a UNC shirt, print out a diploma and tell people you’re an alum

By Katie

Well!

I for one, like the redecorating around here—so austere, so tasteful. Kind of McSweeney’s-esque but without all the dumb content.

Just kidding! Seriously McSweeney’s, just kidding.

I admit, when I first saw it I was like “HACKED! HACKED AGAIN! HAAAAAAACKED” and then I ran outside, dropped to my knees and raised my arms up to the heavens as the tears came down. Why….whyyyyy…

But then I read that thing that Jacob wrote and I was fine. Good job Jacob, I love the new look!

I’m just starting Twin Peaks on Netflix as I write this; I’ve never seen it and I’ve been told it’s right in my wheelhouse, so I’m excited but also kind of distracted. Which pretty much describes every moment that I am awake.

So the deal was, when I was a kid, we had to eat a real meal before the bacchanal of trick-or-treating started. My mother was, and is, a phenomenal creator of meals worth all the ceremony of hand-washing and grace-saying and table setting, but on Halloween, c’mon– we were champing at the bit to get out in the field, so she cut us a break and fed us something easy and quick like weenie beanies or spaghettio hotdish.

It’s better for you than candy! It is.

A break for her, too—are you kidding me? Now that I am a person in charge of feeding other people, I cannot believe the meals she made for us on a nightly basis.

Case in point—tonight I made her sweet and sour chicken. It takes a while, kids, and it dirties up every surface and every pan in the kitchen and makes the whole house stink for days. I can only imagine what it does to my insides.

I’ve tried tamping down the “terrible for you” quotient; I’ve tried not breading it, I’ve tried baking it instead of frying it, and it’s just not the same.

Tonight we threw caution and years of our lives to the wind and rocked it old-school. I’m headachy now and very soon an Ebola-type (you didn’t think I would get through this entire post without mentioning Ebola, did you?) situation will occur in my bathroom, but it was worth every bite.

Earlier though, as I was standing at the stove, frying breaded chicken and reflecting on my life, I couldn’t help but think of my mom, making this absurdly complicated, messy meal for eleven people–at least ten of which were guaranteed to want seconds. Lots of times mom would barely eat once we sat down at the table.

“I’m sick of looking at it,” she’d say when questioned. I’m pretty sure she meant the food, not the brood. Best not to dig too deeply. 

Back to Halloween.

The hours after school and between dinner were a whirlwind of pumpkin carving and costume procuring–kids running from house to house, scrounging through each family’s belongings to try and find something, anything, that could pass for a costume. The lower the sun got, the more frantic we became. Loooottt of ghosts back then, friends, ghosts and hobos.

If you were really lucky you had an older brother who worked construction or played football or something, or a journalist dad who traveled a lot and had a strange collection of accessories—good luck sneaking them out of his office, though. (Did I ever tell you the story about how on “wacky hat day” at school, my eight-year-old self snuck what I thought was a real cute beret with a cute little star on it, only to have the war-veteran gym teacher explain to me in a shaky voice that it was official issue Viet Kong? No? I thought for sure I had.)

For some weird reason, one year we had three store-bought costumes. I have no idea where they came from—someone must’ve given them to my mom, and we found them crammed in the bottom drawer of the dresser on the back porch.

There was a Frankenstein, a Dracula –both primo, grade A, top-tier monsters– and a vague, female spook; a white mask with a flame of red hair and a white gown with a scary jack-o-lantern on it.

Billy and Andy immediately grabbed Frankenstein and Dracula, leaving me with the lame, nobody-knows-what-this-is-supposed-to-be costume.

My sister Margy told me it was something called Pumkin Lady, and she rolled around on the ground, tripping people and breaking their necks.

Huh. I still wore it, it was store-bought, after all—but I knew it was b.s.

Starting Five

1. Paris And The Giant Butt Plug

Nope, not the much anticipated sequel to James and the Giant Peach—oh that it were.

It’s a sculpture, entitled “Tree”, by American artist Paul McCarthy. It was erected, loud and proud, in the Place Vendome in Paris last week.

It’s a tree. Where you deposit it is entirely up to you. Alternately, “Timberrrrrr!”

Apparently those who know contemporary art know McCarthy does things like this—makes big, silly, obvious sculptures and pretends they’re something else, so one has to wonder why anyone is surprised when his artwork causes a ruckus.

Perhaps that’s the point? Maybe he’s just seeing if he can continue getting artsy types to fund his work no matter how ridonk it is.

It’s gone now—vandals deflated it in the night—and when it was first revealed, apparently someone in the crowd slapped the artist and ran off. That sounds so French, doesn’t it?

hahw dah yeww! I can hardly eet mah baguette!

French Philistine: “Zees ees not a tree, it ees ze buttplug! I know becazz mah waahfe hahzz a large colleczion of zem! I slap you in zee name of France!”

Paul McCarthy, rubbing the reddish spot on his gently molested cheek: “My plan worked. Again.”

McCarthy is reportedly hard at work on his next piece, a three-story inflatable sausage tentatively titled, “Not a Dildo”.

2. Oscar De La Renta Gets On the List Twice

John already covered this yesterday, but I’m doing it again. Why? Here’s why:

I’ll put that up against “Tree” any day of the week.

I love  beautiful art, whether it’s a painting, a comic book, a butt plug or a ballgown, and Mr. De La Renta was one of the very best. I cannot and probably never will be able to afford couture, but I am a great appreciator of it.

And when I was a kid, I used to check fashion magazines out of the library and draw the dresses. I usually tried to slip a few issues of After Dark (not for the articles, either!) into my pile as well, but I always got caught. A story for another day.

Are you sure your mom said this was OK?

3. Killer Bananas

The last thing you’d expect to find lurking in your bananas is a creature whose Greek scientific name means “murderess.”

But that’s exactly what one London family found after a grocery delivery from the Waitrose supermarket chain, the Daily Mail reports. The family patriarch (known only as “Tim”) was unloading the groceries when he spied the venomous Brazilian wandering spider—the world’s most dangerous arachnid, LiveScience reports—and panicked, dropping the bananas into a bowl and trapping the spider by one of its legs.

My favorite part of this story is “known only as Tim”. Why so cagey, Tim?

Is it because you don’t want that spider’s family to find you? Well it will, Tim. You can count on that.

You’re on my list, “Tim”.

4. It Doesn’t Make Sense

Toys ‘R Us is selling Breaking Bad action figures, and a Florida mom is petitioning to have them removed from store shelves. I have to agree with her; why are there action figures for a show that never had any actual action? Oh, snap.

Guaranteed 50% more entertaining than the show!

5. Questionable Study of the Week

According to a Hungarian study, those born in the summer tend to be moody bastards and those born the winter tend to be lovable and easy going. To support this claim, the article I read about it included this picture, with this caption:

Christian Bale was born in winter time and therefore tends to be even-keeled.

Wait, what??

Those Hungarians. Always misreading the signals.

Finally, I am very excited to tell you that I am going to see the fantastically fabulous Tig Notaro tomorrow night! Full review next week.

Starting Five

The death toll is at 39

1. Death in the Himalayas

Your next Outside magazine cover story –has Jon Krakauer already been deployed?– will come directly from the popular Annapurna Circuit in Nepal, where recent snowfall, flash floods and avalanches have claimed the lives of 39 hikers. None of the casualties thus far are Americans, which may be why you have not heard all that much about it.

October is by far the most heavily trafficked month on the popular circuit of high-altitude trails, when about 30% of the year’s total of 90,000 or so trekkers cross the 17,769-foot Thorong La Pass. The Circuit ranges from 100 to 145 miles in length and is far more accessible to the average REI shopper than, say, an Everest trek. More than 300 hikers needed to be rescued in the last week and the death toll may climb.

2. Welcome Back, Neo

Shane Falco. Johnny Utah. Neo. Bill (or was it Ted? It was Ted). It’s been a quarter century since Keanu Reeves entered our lives (what ever became of Alex Winter, a.k.a, Bill, by the way?) as a high school slacker and he’s had every bit as successful a career, minus the Oscar love, of that other ’80s high school slacker, Sean Penn.

Reeves is back in John Wick, a vigilante flick set in New York City, and it’s been receiving uncommonly stellar reviews. Rotten Tomatoes has given it a 100%, which makes me think that the easy grader has been put in charge of the site this week. Wick’s thirst for revenge is whetted after a Russian hit man kills his dog (and man, I can get behind that. You come after my kitty cat, I’m going ISIS on your ass…or some other part of you).

Keanu turned 50 last month, by the way. Is this the part where I tell you he’s older than Wilfred Brimley was when they made Cocoon (and maybe the point is that Mr. Brimley just didn’t take very good care of himself?). Personally, I’ve always wondered about the people who write the screenplays for Keanu Reeves films. Here’s how I imagine their conversations with directors go:

Writer: In this scene, I gave Keanu a three-sentence monologue.

Director: Too many words.

Writer: One sentence?

Director: Too many words.

Writer: How about if he says–

Director: Too many words.

3. Bulls on Parade

Our friends at Professional Bull Riders (PBR) Inc. staged a first-ever event on the sand at Huntington Beach this weekend. Bushwacker attended only as an ambassador, though, and I imagine he was somewhat put off by the proximity of the event to the Black Bull Chop House.

Matt Triplett, a 23 year-old from Columbia Falls, Mont., was your winner. Is it good to be a bull rider from a town with “Falls” in its name? You wouldn’t think so. Now it’s on to the World Finals in Las Vegas this week, where Bushwacker will make his last ride. The bucks stop here (I’ve used this line before, but hey, I like it).

4. Who Are You Mourning?

His funeral should have a runway, not an aisle

Boxing Fashion lost an icon yesterday as legendary middleweight designer Oscar de la Hoya Renta died. He was 41 82.

5. You Win, Morgan Spurlock

Should that arrow be pointing down?

Ten years after the release of Super Size Me, an entertaining documentary in which our director/star ingests nothing but McDonald’s food for an entire month, McD’s announces quarterly earnings in which its profits plummet 30%. Downsize Me?

Reserves

You knew it would be only a matter of time before dejected Notre Dame fans started going Zapruder film on that fourth-and-3 play. My two favorite versions are this (notice how he uses “freakin'” and “friggin'”, instead of the true vulgarity; that’s such a Domer move) one and this frame-by-frame “smoking gun” clip.

My two cents: if Notre Dame decides to run this play again, in a game-deciding moment, here’s what I’d have Will Fuller and C.J. Prosise do (taking cue from a previous ACC game this season). By the way, watch that video and notice how the announcers don’t seem to notice what makes the play unique.

Remote Patrol

World Series: Game 1

Giants at Royals

FOX 8 p.m.

Will we tune in for the anomaly of seeing Kansas City in the World Series? Or is FOX going to get killed in the ratings? Interesting trivia to share with your pals: Ned Yost, born and raised in Eureka, Calif., is a former taxidermist. Bruce Bochy, born in France, was a high school teammate of SNL alum Darrell Hammond. Go ahead and run with that, Erin Andrews.

STARTING FIVE

1. “No Pick! No Pick!”

Will have more to opine on this later —oh, we bet you will–but a few thoughts:

1. Wrong of me to chastise anyone for whining about such a controversial and cataclysmic ref”s flag so soon after the incident. That is on me.

2. If you could possibly look at this play again for the first time –which, of course, is impossible–you’d see two Irish receivers appearing to create massive obstruction to Florida State’s defensive backs. If you go back and look at it a second or 85th time, if you go full-bore Zapruder film on the play, then yeah, you see one DB literally holding C.J. Prosise at the line and you also notice that the Seminole secondary was utterly dazed and confused and would have never prevented the TD, anyway. But on first viewing…which again, you can no longer ever do, I’m not sure if you see all that.

And, yes, you can point out the missing helmet on the FSU player right after or the fact that the ref who flagged the OPI is the same human who ejected Stephon Tuitt last season –you’re not incorrect– but all of it adds up to, “So what?” The Irish had first and goal from the 9 with about :40 to play and were unable to take care of business. Shades of the 2009 USC loss. Score earlier and all of the controversy vanishes. On the road, versus the defending national champion, leave no doubt.

This much I feel confident about: Had Florida State scored the game-winner on that exact same play, with no flag, the message boards at NDNation.com would be lighting up with complaints about the non-call.

3. This was possibly the best game Notre Dame has played since the 1993 tilt with these same Seminoles. Why? Because unlike the Bush Push Classic of 2005, Notre Dame took on a Top 3 team and manhandled it on the line of scrimmage while also matching it athlete for athlete. It took the very best effort of the reigning Heisman Trophy winner to take down the Irish on Saturday night.

4. Heading into that fateful play, the Irish had already preserved their unbeaten season with not one but two unlikely 4th-and-long conversions: 4th-and-11 versus Stanford and 4th-and-18 moments earlier. You can only put yourselves in those positions so many times. As Brian Kelly said, “You have to knock out the champion.” Correct. You have to leave no doubt.

Winston may be the game’s most notorious player, but after that 15-16 second half, he also deserves to be right back atop the Heisman race.

5. Everything the Irish still hope to achieve, short of an undefeated season, remains within their grasp. Win out and it’ll be difficult to make a case against them being the most deserving one-loss team remaining. Only Georgia or Alabama, in my opinion, would have as solid an argument.

6. SEC Knockout Games that will help the Irish: Auburn-Georgia, Mississippi State-Alabama, Mississippi State-Ole Miss, Auburn-Alabama. You know at least one SEC team is in the playoff. Any one-loss SEC team will also have a valid argument. If you are a fan of Notre Dame or Oregon or the Ohio State-Michigan State winner, you want Mississippi State to win out.

7. Notre Dame is great television. Opposing fans may hate to admit it, but like the Seventies Dallas Cowboys, the Irish don’t know how to play drama-free games any more. The Selection Committee may not consciously consider that, but there’s no one involved with the Playoff who loves money who won’t want Notre Dame if the Irish finish 11-1.

8. So, I was kinda wrong about Texas A&M. The Medium Happy 8, as it stands: Mississippi State, Ole Miss, Florida State, Alabama, Notre Dame, Oregon, Auburn, TCU.

9. October 18 now stands for: The Galloping Ghost’s five-touchdown day versus Michigan (1924), “Outlined against a blue-gray October sky (1924), Keith Jackson’s birthday (1928), and The Pick (2014).

Schmidt had 9 tackles and an INT in biggest game of his life. Is Irish’s leading tackler. Perhaps ND should retroactively pay his first two years of school.

10. Corey Robinson became a star on Saturday night. If you are a Notre Dame fan, you’re proud to have your school represented by players such as Robinson, Joe Schmidt (did you know that he is a former walk-on?), Jaylon Smith, Max Redfield, Everett Golson, Sheldon Day, Cam McDaniel (another helmet-losing play in a prime-time nationally televised game…Nice!), etc.

The Irish lost the game Saturday night in Tallahassee, but there’s no telling how many future recruiting battles they won.

11. Brian Kelly said everything right both on Saturday night and Sunday afternoon. If you are a Notre Dame fan or alum, you want him to be crabby and a little bit defiant. Reggie Bush won Twitter on Saturday night by tweeting, “Wow, not sure about that call” and “Hate to see a game decided by that.” Yes, Irish fans, a ref buried his flag when he should’ve tossed one nine years and three days earlier, which cost you a victory against a defending national champ with a long win streak and now you were burned in exactly the opposite way (shades of the 1989 versus 1993 rationale for the Irish not finishing No. 1). Yes, you’re right. But that won’t change anything. Gotsta move on.

12. I love that Jimbo Fisher gave Jameis the “humble pie” talk and that not 30 minutes later Jameis said that he was thinking, when the Irish apparently scored the go-ahead TD with :17 left, that “they left too much time on the clock.” Never change, Jameis. At least not on the football field. This is who you are in shoulder pads and a helmet, and look how far it has gotten you.

Okay, this is all I have right now. I am in Quebec and will have more later if possible. Merci beaucoup to Jacob Anstey for rolling up his sleeves this weekend and making the site look like someone actually cares about its aesthetic appeal. Great job, JA.