Starting Five

The 9th inning image Cardinal fans hoped to see.

 Missouri…..Misery

“Truth is stranger than Fiction, but it is because Fiction is obliged to stick to possibilities; Truth isn’t.”

Oh, that’s Missouri native Samuel Clemens, a man who knew his way around a pithy sports lede, even if he wasn’t a sportswriter.

How do you explain the past three days in Missour-uh, as my fifth-grade teacher, Mrs. Claypool, a Show-Me State native, used to say it? Old-timer baseball fans (are there any other kind) like to tell you that in any given game you can see something that you’ve never before witnessed, that’s part of the game’s charm.

So last night, for the first time in World Series history, a game ends with a pickoff play at first base. Just one night after Game 3 ended in unique fashion, a World Series-first obstruction call at third base. If you’re scoring at home, the Sox have lost two games of this World Series because of a poor –and more importantly, an ill-advised –throw from home (where the tying run had just scored) to third base.

Missouri’s perfect season ends by mere inches, as the game-tying field goal in OT hits the upright.

And, if you’re still scoring at home (resisting urge to usurp Olbermann joke here), that’s two consecutive games that ended with a Cardinal runner being tagged out at a base, although the Cardinals won one of those games.

Both endings were put into motion by a ninth-inning pinch hit by Allen Craig, who was just activated for the Fall Classic after missing a month with an injury that was caused  by an umpire.

In both games the Red Sox scored four runs.

It’s shaping up as a bizarre World Series. Would you want any other kind?

Adding to the misery of the Cards’ 4-2 Game 4 defeat at Busch Stadium? The batter, Carlos Beltran, who represented the tying run, is hitting .300 in the World Series and has been the very definition of clutch this month.

This catch by Ellington means that we still have a chance of Jadeveon Clowney versus the Alabama offense in December.

Meanwhile, in the center of the state, a far more soul-crushing loss for the Missouri Tigers. Mizzou, which had quietly risen to No. 5 in the BCS rankings with a 7-0 record, led South Carolina 17-0 in the fourth quarter. But the Ol’ Ball Coach had put hobbled quarterback Connor Shaw into the game late in the third quarter. Shaw led USC to 17 unanswered fourth-quarter points to force overtime.

In OT, South Carolina trailed 24-17 and faced a fourth-and-goal from its 15-yard line. Shaw connected with Bruce Ellington, who was surprisingly wide open.

In the second OT, after the Gamecocks had settled for a field goal, Mizzou had first-and-goal from the 8 after a 17-yard run by Marcus Murphy right through Jadeveon Clowney’s kitchen. Eight yards from 8-0 and no worse than fifth in the polls. But the Tigers were unable to find paydirt and Andrew Bagget’s 24-yard field goal try struck the upright, though kudos to ESPN’s Joe Tessitore for noticing that the holder failed to spin the laces away from Bagget’s foot.

Whether or not Middlebrooks was trying to obstruct Craig is irrelevant.

Also, that’s consecutive weekends that the Red Sox have won a postseason game with a Hawaiian intimately involved with the outcome. Last Saturday it was Shane Victorino’s grand slam (I know; that feels like two years ago). Last night it was Kolten Wong’s boner, though credit Koji Uehara for a cobra-quick pickoff. Also, as Ed Sherman notes, how can you be that hard on Wong when even Fox missed Uehara’s throw?

Also, for context, it’s not as if the rookie Wong was fooled by the old hidden-ball trick, as the team’s leadoff man, Matt Carpenter, was just one month ago in Denver (timing is everything, Kolten; you’ll learn that).

Memorable weekend for the denizens of the Show Me State. Missouri, misery, mystery.

2. Who Belongs In This Space?

It’s no reach to put Benjamin and the Seminoles at No. 2.

My favorite moment of an overindulged college football Saturday? It was still scoreless during the North Carolina State-Florida State contest (I use that term loosely here), when Seminole quarterback Jameis Winston pitched to (not William) Karlos Williams for a sweep around the right edge. Into my screen comes sophomore wide receiver Kelvin Benjamin, who is six-foot-five inches and 235 pounds of badass, for a crackback block on the hap-deprived Wolfpack linebacker on the edge.

Benjamin buries him as Williams scoots around the edge for an 18-yard TD scamper. But here’s the best part (thanks to Eric Nelson for supplying the video). After the block Benjamin never rotates his head to see if Williams scores. He simply stands over the fallen soldier and is either looking at Winston or the Seminole bench as he nods his head as if to say, “Yup, I’m bad.”

(The Seminole coaching staff rewarded Benjamin on the very next Seminole offensive play by dialing his number for a post route. The result was a 39-yard touchdown catch.)

“Yup, I’m bad” was the day’s theme for the nation’s top four teams. The Seminoles led N.C. State, a team that beat them only a year ago, 35-0 after 13 minutes. No. 1 Alabama, whose game had the same 3:30 p.m. kickoff, was slightly more reserved, waiting until halftime to post a 35-0 score against Tennessee. No. 2 (now No. 3) Oregon found itself deadlocked with an outstanding UCLA squad (at least defensively) at halftime, 14-14 all, but then scored 28 unanswered second-half points.

And No. 4 Ohio State simply buried Penn State, 63-14.

At halftime the respective scores were 42-0, 35-0, 14-14, and 42-7.

And we shouldn’t forget Baylor, which led Kansas 38-0 at the half.

The Bruins lost in Eugene, but linebacker Jordan Zumwalt (here burying Taylor Martinez back in September) was the breakout star.

What does it all mean, besides the fact that you are better off picking these teams to cover their halftime spreads than their game spreads? Nothing yet.

Everyone arguing over whether Oregon or Florida State is No. 2 –as if we can objectively state that Alabama is No. 1 and Ohio State is No. 4 — is just wasting his or her alveoli contractions.

The 10 most important games remaining this season, pre-conference championship games edition:

1) No. 7 Miami at No. 3 Florida State, Nov. 2

Why are the Seminoles favored by 21? Because they should win by 28. And yet this win would give FSU style points due to Hurricanes’ BCS ranking, which is a mirage.

2) No. 2 Oregon at No. 5 Stanford, Nov. 7

Will ESPN’s Thursday night curse befall the Ducks in Palo Alto?

3) No. 10 Oklahoma at No. 8 Baylor, Nov. 7

It’s an uphill climb for the undefeated Bears, but it begins tonight in Waco versus a worthy foe.

In the lowest combined sum race (Scoring Offense + Scoring Defense), Baylor and FSU are tied at 7

4) No. 13 LSU at No. 1 Alabama, Nov. 9

Tigers ruined Tide’s undefeated season in Tuscaloosa –or so we thought–last time they visited.

5) No. 2 Oregon at Arizona, Nov. 23

Wildcats have one of the nation’s top running backs in Kadeem Carey and ruined Ducks’ quest for a national title in Tucson in 2007.

Arizona’s Ka’deem Carey is once again leading the nation in rushing…if not carries.

6) Oregon State at No. 2 Oregon, Nov. 29

Civil War and a quarterback who can match Marcus Mariota score for score. Beavers shouldn’t win, but that’s why we play.

7) No. 4 Ohio State at No. 21 Michigan, Nov. 30

The Game. If Wolverines lose in East Lansing this Saturday, the value of this win diminishes.

8.) Alabama at No. 11 Auburn, Nov. 30

Here’s your last four national champions meeting once again in the Iron Bowl.

9) Florida State at Florida, Nov. 30

Because The Swamp is never an easy place to win (I don’t think the Canes will provide much of a test this weekend).

10) No. 25 Notre Dame at No. 5 Stanford, Nov. 30

Lots of Don Meredith-ian ifs and buts involved here, but Cardinal are currently No. 5. If Irish win out to be 9-2 when they arrive in Palo Alto, if Cardinal are 10-1 (having knocked off Ducks), and if Alabama and either FSU or Ohio St. have lost, then this game has meaning. Besides, it’s a sexy matchup even though Notre Dame last won here in 2007.

Oh, and not that the BCS cares, but 8-1 Ball State visits 8-0 Northern Illinois (No. 17 in the BCS) on November 13. I care, Huskies, I care. And I wouldn’t be surprised if College Gameday heads to Rockford.

3. Boardwalking Dead Empire

Daryl and Carol: Tougher than the rest.

Last night I whined that “The Walking Dead” has morphed into “Lockdown” with a bad cough. Are you a fan of the mystery virus story arc? Are you wondering about the irony of the fact that the Center for Disease Control is located in Atlanta? Do you think that Daryl, whom we’ve dubbed “Ugly Cute Guy” in our abode, might want to pay less attention to what CD is in the glove compartment? How many zombies does it take to cause your tires to spin? Did you see Marilyn Manson on “Talking Dead” and wonder, How come they didn’t book Rob Zombie instead (especially after listening to the nonsense effluent that was falling from Manson’s lips)? Is this entire season a metaphor for us, that we’d rather imprison ourselves and have a false sense of security than risk the great outdoors and unknown (that’s the ghost of Chris McCandless shouting, “YES! YES! YES!”). Why does Herschel button his long-sleeved shirt to the top button when it’s gotta be 100 degrees with 80% humidity in that Georgia heat? Did Carol really send the ridiculously cute little girl into the quarantine area and does that make her the Nick Saban of the survivors?

I’ve got questions! You supply the answers.

4. Robert Durand is a Little Sensitive About His Physique

This happened last week, but I didn’t want it to disappear forever. The Washington Post published a story in which it described a U.S. Navy captain as “thickset”, and apparently someone at the Department of Defense took objection to that adjective.

5. Eye of the Lion?

Stafford and Megatron sent the Cowboys home to Dallas with a .500 record.

So strange to see a native son of Dallas pull a Roger Staubach on the Cowboys yesterday. I’ll let others opine on the Dez Bryant tirade. I just enjoyed watching Stafford drone-strike the Cowboy secondary on that final drive, finding seams in the defense that seemingly did not exist. Stafford was four-for-four for 79 yards, and then he punctuated it with that dive over the top when the ‘boys probably expected him to spike it from the one. Brilliant.

FYI, the Lions scored 24 fourth-quarter points and the Broncos 31.

Oh, and the NFL exiled San Francisco and Jacksonville to London, because if a 28-0 game at halftime won’t induce Brits –who already have a sport of football that they’re passionate about — to switch teams, so to speak, what will?

Remote Patrol

World Series, Game 5

FOX 8 p.m.

Speaking of “rake”….

I’ll watch Greg Kinnear in anything (but especially in “Stuck On You”) so I don’t mind the FOX promos for “Rake.” What will the Fall Classic give us for a bizarre ending tonight? Will Koji Uehara balk in the winning run? Walk-off foul ball fly out caught by Jarrod Saltalamacchia? David Ortiz barreling over Yadier Molina at home plate? Tim McCarver — a former Cardinal catcher of some renown, mind you– slap fighting Joe Buck?

Six weeks ago, if I had told you that a native Texan whose highly decorated high school career that ended in 2010 was now the toast of college football, you’d reply, “Of course. Johnny Football!”

Not anymore. Enter the Cam Era.

McDaniel in the lions’ den. Okay, they’re Trojans, but what’s an Old Testament reference amongst friends?

With the assistance of one serendipitously snapped picture by Chicago-based photographer Jonathan Daniel, Notre Dame junior running back Cam McDaniel has become the world’s most famous college football player –at least for this week.

Manziel played quarterback at Class 4A Kerrville Tivy High School in Kerrville, Texas. McDaniel played running back at Class 5A Coppell High School in Coppell, Texas.

Manziel won the Heisman Trophy last year. McDaniel began this year third on the depth chart at running back.

Manziel’s Texas A&M Aggies are 5-2. McDaniel’s Notre Dame Fighting Irish are 5-2.

Of course, comparing Manziel to McDaniel not only does a disservice to both, but it ignores yet another iconic Texas prep football player who should be mentioned….

Tim Riggins.

Dillon High Panthers.

“Clear eyes, full hearts, can’t lose.”

Also a running back. Also wore No. 33. Also set the internet a flame with his insouciant dreaminess.

Tim Riggins: Female viewers preferred him to play sans helmet as well.

Tim Riggins, the bad boy everyone can’t help but love, the womanizing, beer-swilling mess of hair and chiseled mandible from Friday Night Lights who once, when quizzing the Panther JV about game-situation duties and finding their answers wanting, said: “Too late, play’s over. You waited too long to make a decision. Now we lost the  game because of you, now we’re not going to state, and now the whole town of  Dillon hates you and you’re never going to get laid. FACT.”

Tim Riggins. You want him on your team. When you’re running an illegal chop shop, Tim will take the fall for you. Sure, he may occasionally fall into bed with your girlfriend after you’ve been paralyzed from the neck down attempting to tackle a linebacker who intercepted your pass  (maybe if you hadn’t thrown the interception in the first place? Right?), but who holds grudges over such trifling transgressions.

From Crucifictorious to tormenting Jesse. What happened to you, Landry?

Oh, and did you know that one of Tim’s teammates, Landry Clarke, moved one state west, changed his name to Todd, and took on an entirely new persona as a meth-cooking psychopath? I kid you not.

Anyway, back to Cam McDaniel, who unlike Riggins is no womanizer. In fact, he has a fiancée. Or so we were told in a Friday morning appearance on the Today Show, although the alleged to-be-betrothed never appeared on camera. I imagine two interns at Deadspin are running down the verity of this claim as you read this.

Before Notre Dame’s season opener versus Temple on August 31, McDaniel’s claim to viral fame involved a run-in with a gauntlet machine. It happened during fall camp in August. The Irish running backs coach, Tony Alford, was away attending his brother’s funeral and so head coach Brian Kelly oversaw the RB drills that session. Serendipitously, or unfortunately, depending on your perspective, Notre Dame also allowed ESPN’s cameras to film practice on that one day as well. Notre Dame practices are almost ALWAYS closed to media (the Scissor Lift Effect).

Back to Cam. Someone had set up the Gauntlet Machine, an apparatus with springs on hinges that only bend in direction, the wrong way. Kelly ordered McDaniel, who was first in line, to run through it with about a 10 yard head start. McDaniel pointed out that the apparatus needed to be turned 180 degrees, but Kelly pooh-poohed the suggestion and told him to go.

Cam vs Machine: He’s not ‘ridiculously photogenic’ here, is he, ladies?

And this, for me, is where Cam McDaniel became a legend. Because, knowing that the Gauntlet would throw him backward with the force of three Stephon Tuitts, he ran full-bore into it, anyway. And that’s exactly what happened. But Cam McDaniel proved something to me in that moment: he’ll run through a wall for you. Or die trying.

At the time McDaniel remained an innocuous, faceless (!) Irish running back, a punchline for Deadspin/Bleacher Report/SB Nation/Lost Lettermen/Yardbarker/Dr. Saturday/The Big Lead and, yes, even this site.

A few weeks later, in the Irish opener versus Temple, McDaniel did not start –George Atkinson III did — but he finished with more carries (12) than any of the five Irish RBs who did get carries. McDaniel gained 65 yards, his long run an 18-yarder, while USC transfer gained a team-high 68 thanks in large part to a 45-yard scamper in the first quarter.

The Cam Era had yet to be born.

The following Saturday in Ann Arbor, before more people (115, 109) than had ever seen a football game in person, including Marshall Mathers, Cam had just one rush for four yards. The Irish trailed 14-0 early, and for the entire game, televised in prime time on ESPN, Kelly leaned far more on Tommy Rees’ arm than on any RB’s legs (Carlisle had a team-high 12 carries for 64 yards).

The first time.

It was not until a week later, in a prime-time game on ABC at Purdue, that the country got its first taste of the helmet-(less) Cam. Late in the second quarter with the Irish trailing 10-0, the five-foot-ten, 205-pounbd back got four straight carries to take the ball from the Purdue 18 down to the Boilermaker 3 (the Irish would settle for a field goal). On the last of his four carries the bullish McDaniel, who seems to enjoy running between the tackles, had his helmet knocked off. This photo emerged, but America failed to notice (where were you then, Tamryn Hall?)

This helmet-knocker drew blood, but McDaniel simply drank it as a halftime energy drink and returned more robust.

Midway through the fourth quarter, with the Irish clinging to a 31-24 lead after a Purdue touchdown, Carlisle fumbled on first down.

After the Irish held Purdue on downs, Kelly replaced Carlisle with our square-jawed argonaut. There was 7:22 remaining and the Irish held a 7-point lead on the road. Notre Dame would run eleven more plays. Ten of them would be rushing plays, and all of those would be handoffs to the sure-handed Cam. Purdue never saw the ball again. And it was then, when Kelly basically announced to whoever cared to listen that McDaniel was the player he trusted most, that the Cam Era arrived.

It wasn’t that Cam was spectacular. It was simply that he ran with purpose, with his shoulders squared, and that he was not about to fumble. Ten carries for 42 yards –three carries were for zero yardage–when every last person at Ross-Ade Stadium knew he was getting the handoff.

McDaniel finished with 16 carries for 56 yards and one TD. Pedestrian, sure. But Kelly, a coach who’d seen a running back and a quarterback fumble away sure TDs that went for TDs in the other direction two years ago (Jonas Gray versus USF and Dayne Crist versus USC), is more concerned with his running backs holding onto the football.

Anyway, two weeks later, versus Arizona State in Arlington, Tex, not too far from the Dallas suburb where he grew up, McDaniel was involved in another head-banger. At the end of a 29-yard run he knocked helmet with a Sun Devil defensive back and had to leave the game (see what happens when the helmet stays on?). He did return.

And then, after a bye week, last Saturday night’s game versus Southern California.

Remember me, America?

The play that launched McDaniel’s Hollister-worthy modeling career the one that he and his teammates have dubbed “Blue Steel” (Zoolander reference), occurred in the second quarter. The Irish took over on their own 22 after a missed USC field goal attempt with 12:12 remaining and McDaniel carried on consecutive plays, for 2 and 6 yards. One of those carries ended with McDaniel losing his helmet, but continuing on. My guess is that it was the latter, in which a false start penalty on Notre Dame tackle Ronnie Stanley nullified the play.

The drive stalled there.

Cam sat out the next series.

Then, on the following series, he returned.

With the Irish trailing 10-7 late in the first half, Cam had runs of 24 and 36 yards –his longest career rushes –that helped the Irish to its go-ahead touchdown, a reception by T.J. Jones. Who knew at the time that it would be the game’s final score?

McDaniel finished with a team-high 92 yards (we’re knee-deep in the hoopla for a young man who has yet to record a 100-yard rushing effort, by the way) on 18 carries, but it wasn’t until Jonathan Daniel’s photo emerged two days later that his life changed.

Michigan’s Vincent Smith lost his helmet, too, but ended up on the wrong side of this meme.

On Monday afternoon a follower on Twitter, Nick Chapa, sent me a link to the photo and used the term “ridiculously photogenic” to describe the shot. Of course, it’s not simply that McDaniel has Abercrombie & Fitch catalog looks. It’s that, in the midst of this maelstrom of malfeasance, in a tempest of men much larger than he who bid him ill will, that his visage is so placid. That preternatural calm. That is what makes the photo so iconic, so unforgettable.

I posted an item on Tuesday morning noting that Notre Dame is “Unranked, But Extremely Handsome”. I still think that if such a photo of six-foot-seven tight end Troy Niklas ever finds its way to Deadspin that the internet will burst.

Anyway, you’ve seen all the madness that has happened since, culminating in Friday’s Today Show interview. I can picture Tamryn, Savannah Guthrie and Natalie Morales all sharing a smoke after it concluded. Seriously, cougars, that was funny.

Tight end Niklas: Could a walk-off against Cam be next?

Worth noting: Notre Dame was on fall break last week, so while the nation swooned over McDaniel, he was pretty much alone on campus with the other fall and winter sports jocks who could not escape home for a week’s respite of home cooking and laundry. It’ll be interesting to see how his classmates treat his newly found celebrity when they return this weekend.

The Irish visit Air Force Academy later this afternoon and will play their least visible, from a television standpoint, game of the year, on CBS Sports Network. So maybe life will return to normal. For Cam. For college football. For America.

Starting Five

Bulls. Bears. Birds? Yes, birds.

1. Aviary Special IPO

Ordinarily, birds are known for heading south this time of year. Especially Canadian snow geese. Have you seen those creatures? They’re huge.

However, today comes news that Twitter has finally set a date and a price for its Initial Public Offering, or IPO. The San Francisco-based company that was founded in 2006 will go public on Wednesday, November 6 and have an initial price of between $17 to $20. Industry experts say that the company is being appraised at a “modest” $11 billion because executives are wary of the “Facebook Effect”, a reference to that company’s calamitous, at least at the time, IPO.

And good luck buying Twitter stock (ticker symbol TWTR) at that price, unless your bank account already has six zeros and two commas.

A thought or two: We can compare Twitter to both Google and Facebook, two other Bay Area-based companies whose website everyone uses but about whom experts said upon their respective IPOs., “But how do they make money?”

The answer: Hand over fist.

Google (GOOG) went public on August 19, 2004. Its IPO price was $85 per share. Nine years later it closed yesterday at $1,025 per share, or 12 times its initial price, or about a 133% jump PER YEAR since its IPO.

Facebook (FB) went public on May 16, 2012, with a glitch-filled IPO (it was delayed for more than a half hour, causing panic) and at a price of $38. The stock price fell all the way down to $18.87 last November 12, but you know what? Yesterday FB closed at $52.44, meaning that if you had bought it on its IPO day and never sold, you’d still be up about 37%. That could change your status from “Middle-class” to “Holiday in Santorini.”

The outlook: I’ll be surprised if Twitter isn’t selling as high as $25-30 by the end of its first day. There may be some turbulence that first week, but five years from now? I doubt anyone who buys the stock this next month will be bummed that they did. Twitter is a far more accessible tool than Facebook, and I find that while I go to Google often, I spend far more time on Facebook. It’s half the fun of watching any sporting event on TV these days.

Finally, The man behind the Twitter IPO, at least on the investment banker side, is Goldman Sachs’ Anthony Noto, a former football player at Army and former CFO at the NFL. One industry insider calls him the “Don Draper of IPOs” (so he didn’t get Hershey?). Noto’s secret for success on this deal? He studied the Facebook IPO playbook and did almost everything opposite.

2. Are Cardinal Pitchers Old Enough to Rent a Car?

The Card rookie can legally drink a highball, but he’d rather not throw one. Wacha, wacha, wacha.

Game 2 Starter Michael Wacha: 22 years old. Six innings pitched, 3 hits, 2 earned runs off a blast to Big Papi. No shame in that. Still gets the Win.

Game 2 Middle Reliever Carlos Martinez: 22 years old. Two innings pitched, one hit, no earned runs, three strikeouts.

Game 2 Closer Trevor Rosenthal: 23 years old. One inning pitched, struck out the side. No hits. no walks. Gets the save.

Wacha is now 4-0 in this postseason and actually raised his ERA to 1.00 with last night’s “disappointing” outing. Not bad, rook.

If you were wondering, pitchers younger than Wacha to have won a World Series game include Madison Bumgarner (21) of the San Francisco Giants in 2010, Fernando Valenzuela (20) of the Los Angeles Dodgers in 1980, Jim Palmer (20) of the Baltimore Orioles in 1966 and Joe Bush (20) of the Philadelphia Athletics in 1913, who was 20 years old at the time.

As for David Ortiz, who has hit five home runs this October, he is now tied with Jim Thome at No. 7 for most postseason blasts with 17. Check out this list, however, and notice plate appearances. Further evidence that Babe Ruth was the greatest ballplayer of all time.

3. Is This Any Way To Promote Captain Phillips?

Couldn’t this have waited until AFTER we released the director’s cut DVD?

The captain and the chief engineer of a U.S. oil supply vessel, C-Retriever, were kidnapped off the coast of Nigeria earlier this week. For the geographically-challenged, Somali pirates operate in the Indian Ocean while Nigerian pirates operate in the Gulf of Guinea, technically the Atlantic Ocean. They have a fierce rivalry, especially in interleague games.

(Also, Nigeria is NOT Niger, although the two nations are adjacent to one another and both give copy editors nightmares. People from Nigeria are known as Nigerians, while people from Niger are known as Nigeriens. Unless you’re Paula Deen [low-hanging fruit, couldn’t resist]. And you thought you’d learn nothing by visiting MH today.)

Anyway, not sure what the pirates are demanding as ransom, but I’d ask for points on the theatrical release as well as a share of the front end. And, if action figures are in the future, I want 5% of the licensing.

4. Steve Rushin in 7 Heaven

No, I said, “Seven Heaven.” Oh well, if we have to run a photo that includes Jessica Biel…

This is the Steve Rushin-est column you may ever read. Read it and then search for other “seven” references that he might have missed. I unearthed James Bond, that Morgan Freeman-Brad Pitt-Kevin Spacey-Gwyneth Paltrow flick, an Uncola  and, of course, the right Reverend Camden and his sultry brood.

“Shaken or stirred?” “Do I look like I give a damn?” (Now THAT’S a great moment)

My man Steve is, thankfully, back on the back page of Sports Illustrated print edition, where he recently penned an eloquent and insightful essay on the NFL’s concussion dilemma. It was a typical Rushin column in that it took seemingly unrelated moments and arcana, tied them all together with an idiot-proof bow, and included a reference to Alan Page, Steve’s boyhood sports hero. I swear, Steve mentions Alan Page nearly as much as I mention Troy Niklas, but they’re both Notre Dame linemen, so it’s all cool.

Alan Page with the Irish. And what does 8 minus 1 equal?

By the way, there are currently only six members in the Rushin-Lobo family. Was this essay a subtle way of suggesting an addition?

5. “Oh Beautiful, O Say Can You See Her, So Fine and Pretty…”

I need verification: Is this James Taylor or is it Daniel Day Lewis as Lincoln after a shave?

Acoustic guitar legend and Bay State native James Taylor gets the “Star-Spangled Banner” duty and instead opens with “America the Beautiful” before catching himself after two words, as Deadspin aptly notes. Personally, and as an inveterate fan of word trains, I wish he would’ve segued from the national anthem directly to Van Halen’s, “Dance The Night Away.”

As if you ever need an excuse to break out that Diamond Dave classic. Oh, and if you’re between the ages of 44 and, say, 52, and you NEVER once scrawled the Van Halen logo on the back of a spiral notebook back in junior high, I don’t even know what to say to you.

Reserves

Pat Haden would already have fired Greg Schiano. I’m just saying. Tampa Bay is 0-7 after last night’s loss at home to Carolina and recruits are decommitting like you wouldn’t believe.

****

Fox’s Pam Oliver, making friends in the Big Apple. Maybe that football that struck her in the head inflicted more damage than first thought.

***
Notre Dame meme Cam McDreamy appears on the Today Show (it is NBC, after all) to discuss THAT photo. The ladies of Today, well, this was a tad (Hamilton) embarrassing, was it not? Even Mario Bartiromo thinks they made fools of themselves.

Here’s a photo of Cam after losing his helmet in the Purdue game, shot by Matt Cashore. And another one, as you can see, below (The meme photo was shot by Jonathan Daniel).

(t Earlier this season McDaniel had his helmet knocked off during a rushing attempt near the goal line at Purdue, but failed to become a meme.

Again, wait until they see Troy Niklas.

Oh, and well done, NBC. You were only three days behind this site, which is man-powered by one unpaid employee, on this story. And you actually have rights to Notre Dame football telecasts.

Also, it’s a good question asked by tweet Tom Daignault: Why does McDaniel’s helmet keep coming off? Sure, he loves contact, but is he not strapping it on (Hey, now!) correctly?

*****

I happen to think Russell Brand is truly brilliant (and, yes, I’m saying this on Katy Perry’s 29th birthday). I find that people who dismiss him out of hand because of his accent, or the way he looks, dresses, or the fact that he’s a comedian, do so at their own risk (right, Mika?). Anyway, thanks to The Big Lead for turning me on to this interview between Brand and a fellow Brit on BBC. What I love about it, and about the Brits in general, is that they can fervently disagree or debate a topic on TV without it seeming personal or vindictive. Just two intelligent people batting around ideas. How refreshing.

****

So, Notre Dame football has a verbal commit from linebacker Greer Martini (the first pledge of the Class of 2014) out of Virginia and is extending an offer to Long Beach, Calif., wide receiver Juju Smith. I’m all for this. See the headline: “Martini’s hits leave opposing RBs shaken AND stirred.”

****

Just wondering, and I’m honestly asking: Has anyone asked Eddie Vanderdoes how many times he has been home since August 1?

Remote Patrol

Boise State at BYU

ESPN 8 p.m.

Petersen, winner of the Israel Gutierrez lookalike contest.

What a compelling matchup this is…in 2009! The Broncos finished 14-0 that season, the Cougars 11-2 (their lone defeats coming to Florida State and to a TCU team that also went undefeated until meeting Boise State in the BCS Outcast Bowl, a.k.a. Fiesta Bowl). These two Mountain Time Zone neighbors assiduously avoided one another for years, but last season they  finally met. Curiously, it was a low-scoring, offensively challenged 7-6 Boise State win on the Smurf Turf.

Why tune in tonight? Because it’s Chris Petersen’s 100th game as Boise State’s head coach, and if he wins his record will be 90-10. Knute Rockne has the greatest winning percentage of any FBS coach with 100 games under his belt, at .881, but Petersen of course will be better than that after tonight, win or lose.

Opposing running backs find BYU’s All-American LB “Van Noying.”

Also, tune in to see BYU linebacker Kyle Van Noy, who may just be the premier defensive player in the country. He is also the only player we know whose name ends in “-annoy”, which we like.

Starting Five

Beltran: “You want me on that wall! You NEED me on that–OUCH!”

1. World Series Game 1: Muck These Cards

I’ll just say it: World Series of Poker, thus far, featuring better Cards than the World Series of Baseball.

–The Boston Red Sox now have a nine-game World Series win streak. The Yankees won 14 consecutive Fall Classic contests beginning in 1996, then 1998, 1999 and 2000. Eat it, Beantown.

–Bottom of the first inning of the World Series, and the second base umpire misses a call that every T-ball umpire could have made from behind home plate? Really? And then the crew, which includes Jim Joyce, reverses that call? Right outcome, wrong process. And somewhere Armando Galarraga, the pitcher from whom Joyce robbed a perfect game a few years back, says, “Oh. So you CAN overturn horrible calls. Thanks. Thanks a lot.”

–And I was thinking, Peter Kozma’s error just loaded the bases with nobody out. Lucky for St. Louis that the Sawx have done nothing at Fenway with the bases juiced this October.

Nobody saw that, right?

–After Adam Wainwright’s brain fart, Cecil Hurt tweeted that “Buttermaker is going to have them do extra work on infield pop-ups.” Don’t feel bad, Adam, your error (oh, it’s a single because no fielder touched it? Okay.) only allowed the Sawx an extra batter who lined a shot to right field that may or may not have taken your best player out of the Series.

–Quickly, the St. Louis Cardinals won their first World Series in 1926, a seven-game affair against the Damned Yankees. Who made the final out and how (pipe down, Olbermann!) (answer at bottom of this item)?

–Fox’s Tim McCarver devoted a decent portion of one half inning, at a stage of the game in which the Sawx led 5-0, informing us that there is both a Texarkana, Arkansas, and a Texarkana, Texas. This is what I like to call “Texarkana arcana.”

(these lines sound fresher if you don’t follow me on Twitter, by the way)

–So Fenway Park, erected in 1912, has a Jumbotron. Notre Dame Stadium, erected in 1930, does not. By the way, the Irish have actually played a football game at Fenway (a 64-0 rout of Dartmouth on October 14, 1944; afterward Mike Lupica blamed Lou Holtz, who was then eight years old, for running up the score) . The Sox have not and will not play a game at Notre Dame Stadium.

Hornsby: “I got you, Babe.”

–Answer: Babe Ruth. The Bambino was caught stealing second base with two outs and the Yankees trailing 3-2 in Game 7. That’s fellow Hall of Famer Rogers Hornsby applying the tag.

2. Grab Your Things/I’ve Come To Take You Home

Gabriel on stage in London, with the same musicians he’s played with for a quarter century.

Wistfully, I’m searching Orbitz for flights to Manchester, UK, because tomorrow marks the final night of Peter Gabriel’s current tour. To celebrate the 25th anniversary of “So”, Gabriel plays the entire album plus a few other gems (Update: Gabriel will actually play four dates in Germany next April and May; who’s with me?). Check out this set list as well as this review, from a show at the O2 Arena in London on Tuesday night.

Granted, Gabriel is 63 years old. The time to have seen the former Genesis member, the one with mischief in his eyes (and lyrics) live was 20 years ago, during the Secret World Live tour, back when he was literally bouncing with energy while performing Solsbury Hill or In Your Eyes, back when Paula Cole was singing back-up. (those two videos are worth your time).

Gabriel belongs in the same class with Tom Petty and John Mellencamp for me. Solo artists who are not QUITE Bruce Springsteen or Prince or Bob Dylan, but at the very closest rung below. Self-indulgent moment here: I’ve been lucky enough to see just about every artist I could’ve wanted to live: Springsteen, U2, Nirvana, Pearl Jam, Queen, The Who, The Rolling Stones, REM, Petty, Van Halen with Diamond Dave, the Osmond Brothers (damn straight), Joe Jackson (spectacular)… but Gabriel is my white whale. I’m sure you have one, too.

It should be noted that Gabriel was one of 16 artists nominated last week for the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame –to be eligible this year, one had to have recorded an album before 1988, or 25 years ago. He should be a shoo-in, as should Nirvana, Linda Ronstadt, KISS and Cat Stevens (how is the guy who gave us Teaser and the Firecat not already enshrined? Really, Jann Wenner? Really?). I know that Chuck Klostermann will lobby for KISS, his favorite band. Hall and Oates were also nominated. I can’t go for that. No can do. But Jeff Pearlman can, as he argues in an essay in the Wall Street Journal.

As for the R&R HoF, last year voting was opened to the general public. And, not surprisingly, last year Rush, a fan-fave band that had been eligible for induction since 1999, was voted in immediately. Rush’s Alex Lifeson let music snob Wenner and his RS cronies know just what he thought of them in this hilarious acceptance speech.

Let’s assume five acts are inducted this year. Who’s in?

Kurt needs another posthumous accolade like he needs a hole in–Nevermind.

1) Nirvana…No brainer

2) NWA….See “Nirvana”

3) Peter Gabriel….commercially successful, critically acclaimed. Already in as a member of Genesis.

4) Cat Stevens…for me, one of the premier singer-songwriters, if not the very best one,  from an age that was defined by singer-songwriters.

5) ???? …. The Replacements have that indie, underground, never-sold-out cred that RS editors swoon over. They’re no Stillwater. And yet, how do you ignore the impact that KISS, or Yes, had on the future of rock-and-roll? Or do you play it safe and go with Deep Purple? “Smoke on the Water” is maybe the first song that every could who got an electric guitar and an amp for Christmas in the Seventies learned. I’m going to go with The Replacements. Gabriel cancels out Yes and Wenner wants to see Gene Simmons beg, or at least suffer, a little. Hall and Oates recorded some timeless pop songs (“Sara Smile”, “She’s Gone”, “She’s A Rich Girl” and “Kiss On My List”) but oh, that hair! And “Maneater” and “Private Eyes.”

3. Democratic Party? Republican Party? No, UNDERAGE PARTY!

I bet he’s a former lacrosse player (looks it up). He is! He is a former lacrosse player (Yale). Don’t tell me I don’t know my white stereotypes.

I never saw this on The Wire. Maryland Attorney General Douglas Gansler stops by a house party last June at a beach in Delaware to speak with his teenage son. The scene is straight out of “Jersey Shore” but Gansler, who is running for governor, is no buzzkill. He talks to his son briefly and then leaves, doing nothing to break up the party.

“Dude, your dad’s so chill. I wish my dad was like that.”

Gansler is taking heat in the media for his (most likely well-honed) ability to look the other way, but on the bright side, he has secured the 18-and-under vote. Wait, what’s that you say?

This was a beach party in Delaware in June. Frankly, I’m surprised I don’t see Scott Van Pelt in this photo.

–Thanks to @okerland for the heads up on this.

4. Trojan War of Attrition

Three days after knocking Tommy Rees out of a game, Dawson is lost for the season.

Southern California middle linebacker Lamar Dawson, a junior, was lost for the season after suffering a knee injury in practice on Tuesday. Dawson, who wears the coveted No. 55 that is only assigned to a Trojan linebacker deemed worthy of it (former wearers include Junior Seau, Willie McGinest, Chris Claiborne and Keith Rivers, knocked Notre Dame quarterback Tommy Rees in Saturday night’s game, which was akin to capturing your opponent’s queen in chess. The Irish did not even come close to scoring, and in fact recorded just one first down, after Rees left with 9:31 to play.

Dawson is one of a slew of players that USC, whose roster is already depleted of scholarship players due to the NCAA not treating them as if they were Miami, lost for the season this week. Freshman tailback Justin Davis underwent surgery after injuring his ankle versus the Irish, while offensive guard Jordan Simmons injured his knee. Safety Gerald Bowman and tailback D.J. Morgan are also out for the season.

Oh, and wideouts Nelson Agholor and Marqise Lee, two of USC’s top three players (we see you, Hayes Pullard) sat out practice yesterday. USC still has a visit to Oregon State, plus home games versus Stanford and UCLA, on the schedule. And Saturday’s contest versus Utah, which beat the Cardinal, is no walkover. USC, now 4-3, must play over its heads just to get to 7-6 (Hawaii visit allows them a 13th game) this season.

5. The Daily Show is The Newsroom with a Shorter Time Lag

Does The Daily Show deserve a Pulitzer for journalism? Why not?

I can’t post Jon Stewart’s monologue every night, but sometimes I think I should. Here’s Stewart lambasting CNBC —Maria Bartiromo, who was feted on-air, shamelessly, last week for 25 years on the network, although it has been years since either 1) she’s mattered or 2) she’s appeared objective, should be particularly embarrassed– for its kid gloves strategy with J.P. Morgan Chase poobah Jamie Dimon.

Stewart: “Only at CNBC is ‘Breaking Bad’ the story of how one man, through hard work and smart business practices, slowly insulates himself from criticism.”

I’m sure she doesn’t care, but I am embarrassed for Bartiromo after seeing this. It may be time for CNBC to gently tell her to just linger a little longer at lunch with the social X-rays at Fred’s on Madison Ave.

Two things: One, The Daily Show is afforded time to look back on current events and then twist a knife into the backs of the crooks and hypocrites who hijack justice. Isn’t Aaron Sorkin doing the same thing, albeit not as comically and with more lag time?

Second, you have to credit Stewart and his staff for never losing their fury. Stewart is a very wealthy man now, and he is part of the establishment. He gets invited to, hell, he headlines some of the very fundraisers that the potentates whom he excoriates attend and are behind. Kudos to him for never forgetting how he got where he is. Something Bartiromo certainly has.

Reserves

Notre Dame will petition the NCAA to allow McDaniel to play helmet-free the remainder of the season.

With the help of astute Twitter follower Nick Chapa (@chappysnacks), I was able to link a photo of helmet-less Cam McDaniel on Tuesday but unable to post one as a pic itself. In the interim, everyone from Deadspin to CNN to USA Today to Lost Letterman to Dr. Saturday has joined the fray.

Which is fine, of course.

How did USC let this Servite alum get away again? Especially with that name?

Two things I’m curious about: How long until America discovers the Sorbo-esque hunkiness of a helmet-free Troy Niklas or the smoove John Legend-suaveness of T.J. Jones. I mean, sure, none of these guys are Zach Martin, but who is?

Jones: Shouldn’t he be playing piano somewhere?

Also, as I sat in the stands at the game with no Mike Mayock to assist me, I wondered why McDaniel did not have to sit out a play after losing his helmet. If memory serves correct, there was a timeout and then McDaniel returned for Notre Dame’s next offensive play. Are referees/umpires just taking October off?

—

Starting Five

“Lincecum got $35 million for two years?!? Man, I hate that jerk!”

1. Mitch Kramer Cashes In

Somewhat inexplicably, and without ever being regarded as the best team in baseball, the San Francisco Giants have won two of the past three World Series (in 2010 four teams finished with better records; in 2012 five were equal or better) . In fact, their record in World Series games this millennium is 8-1. Prit-tee, prit-tee good.

In the 2010 World Series, Tim Lincecum, alias “The Freak”, alias “This Guy’s 5-11, 170 Pounds, So How Come We Can’t Pitch Like That?”, went 2-0 as a starter. In the 2012 Fall Classic Lincecum, pitching exclusively in middle relief, threw 4.2 innings of no-hit ball, striking out eight of the 15 batters he faced and walking one. Again, prit-tee, prit-tee good.

Lincecum in no way resembles the same pitcher who won back-to-back Cy Young Awards in 2008 and 2009, last July’s no-hitter notwithstanding. He is, however, a beloved figure in the Bay Area and the face of the Giants’ pair of championships.

Kanye’s proposal to Kim came not out of left field, but in fact, center.

So while it is true that his ERA was an abominable 5.18 in 2012 and a pedestrian, at best, 4.37 last season, it is not inexplicable that the Giants would sign him to a two-year, $35 million contract yesterday. Hey, it’s smarter than what the Tigers did with Justin Verlander a year ago (eight years?!?) and Lincecum is still only a seven-year veteran.

Oddly enough, The Freak is taking a pay cut. He earned $22.25 million last season.

“I may or may not play ball next season. Right now we’re off to buy Aerosmith tickets. Top priority of the winter.”

So, if you think this deal is bizarre or exorbitant or inexplicable, well, okay. But in terms of unnecessarily extravagant displays of affection this week at AT&T Park, it still finishes second to that whole Kanye-Kim proposal stunt.

2. San Jose Sharknados

Nieto is one skater who traces his history to south, as opposed to north, of the border.

It isn’t even Halloween yet, which means Barry Melrose probably has yet to be released from his crypt, so why am I mentioning hockey? After all, didn’t the NHL wait until after Christmas to start its season last year and did anyone really have that much of a problem with that? Consider this a slight nudge that the San Jose Sharks, the Real Deal of Teal Seal Killers, are the league’s last unbeaten squad at 8-0-1.

The Sharks had been averaging 4.9 goals per game, a full goal better than the next best NHL squad, until Monday night’s 1-0 shootout win in Detroit. One Shark to keep an eye on: rookie left wing Matthew Nieto, a Boston University product who, while a typical Californian, does not fit the standard NHL profile: Nieto was born and raised in Long Beach, Calif., and he is Mexican-American.

3. Is Netflix a House of Cards?

“Honey, please tell me you sold our stock before Mr. Icahn sent that tweet.”

That ol’ wily billionaire Carl Icahn is at it again.

Yesterday Netflix (NFLX) , a company whose stock price in just the past year had soared from about $58 a share to nearly$350 per share, opened up at nearly $390 per share. That’s when Icahn, who had bought a 10% stake in the company last November when it was trading at $60 per, tweeted, “Sold block of NFLX today: Wish to thank Reed Hastings, Ted Sarandos, NFLX team and last but not least, Kevin Spacey.”

After Icahn’s tweet, shares of NFLX plummeted more than $60 per share, or more than 15%. It is currently trading at $324. The best metric of a stock’s value –says this sportswriter who never took a finance class so why listen to him?– is P/E ratio, and NFLX has 276 times earnings. Apple (AAPL), by comparison, trades at a sane, some would say ridiculously cheap, 13 times earnings.

Which is just another way of saying that, as a stock, NFLX itself is a House of Cards. Something that Mr. Icahn exposed yesterday, while walking away himself with a reported $800 million profit.

4. “I Can Call You Betty/And Betty When You Call Me/You Can Call Me Al”

Arizona State, where “dark and stormy” always refers to a cocktail, not a forecast.

A man walks down the street,

He says, “Why am I wearing a Sparky mask?”

Why am I wearing  a mask at all?

When my actual face is well-known?

I’m a middle-aged black dude,

Entering a girls dorm unannounced,

In the state of Arizona, where you can

Get shot for less.”

So America’s weatherman, Al Roker, invades Taylor Place dorm at Arizona State’s downtown Phoenix campus yesterday morning as a promotional stunt for the Today Show. Yes, the young ladies are ardent fans of Today, but maybe Al and the Today producers read that recent issue of Playboy that ranks ASU as the No. 9 party school in the nation (and Doug Tammaro thinks the Sun Devil football team is underrated!).

5. The Big Eight

Grambling facilities: Where’s Phil Knight when you need him?

A few words about college football this week….Miami: I don’t care. I don’t care about show-cause, or NCAA sanctions. Good for Miami. Bad, again, for USC. I think we’ve read this story before. Grambling: Remember that scene in “Rise of the Planet of the Apes”, when Caesar bellows, “NO!” It’s significant not only because Caesar stands up for himself, but also because we learn that he has a voice. Tidal shift. That’s the Grambling situation. We learned that college football players have a voice. As I’ve said numerous times, if college football players really want to effect change, go on strike. Which is what Grambling’s player did, at least for one Saturday. The only thing separating Grambling from their FBS brethren is what they were unwilling to put up with. Your move, well-taken-care-of SEC players.

1. Florida State (6-0)

Why? Because this late into the season, I’m going to subscribe to the “Scoring Defense rank + Scoring Offense rank Sum That Is The Lowest Number” theory, and the Seminoles’ 3+3=6 sum is exactly that. Also, Jameis Winston may be the most dynamic quarterback on an undefeated team. May be.

Next up: North Carolina State.

2. Alabama (7-0)

The Crimson Tide surrendered 21 points in the fourth quarter in College Station. They’ve allowed a grand total of 16 in the five games since (yes, Johnny Manziel is that dynamic). And, according to Wes Rucker, only once in the past three games has an opponent even advanced to the red zone. Bama is going to miss safety Vinnie Sunseri, who will miss the rest of the season due to a knee injury.

Next up: Tennessee

3. Oregon (7-0)

The Ducks are averaging 60.5 points per game in four contests at Autzen Stadium, where they host the No. 12 Bruins on Saturday. Most schools never score 60 points in a game all season long.

Next up: No. 12 UCLA

4. Ohio State (6-0)

Do I think the Buckeyes will wind up in Pasadena? Yes. But they’ll be playing on January 1, not January 6.

Next up: Penn State

5. Missouri (6-0)

A month ago, they probably were considered the 4th-best “Tigers” in the country. Now they’re the fifth-best team? Until someone proves otherwise, yes.

Next up: No. 21 South Carolina.

Dorial Green-Beckham: The nation’s most coveted recruit two years ago has 30 receptions for Mizzou this season.

6. Baylor (6-0)

Are the Bears, who lead the nation in scoring (64.7 ppg) and are 7th in points against, really that good? We wont’ find out until November when they face three teams that are currently in the Top 25.

Next up: at Kansas

7. Auburn (6-1)

The state of Alabama is 2-0 versus Johnny Football this season.

Up next: Florida Atlantic

8. Stanford (6-1)

Trailing by six with one minute to play at Utah, the Cardinal had 3rd-and-2 from the Ute 6. They threw twice, both incomplete. David Shaw would love to have those plays back.

Up next: at No. 25 Oregon State

Remote Patrol

World Series, Game 1

St. Louis Cardinals at Boston Red Sox

FOX 8 p.m.

Coming up next on Saturday Night Live: Boston Red Sox or Ice Road Trucker?

Red Beards versus Red Birds. St. Louis’ clean-up hitter Allen Craig, who batted an MLB-best .454 with RISP but who has been out since September 4 (sprained foot), returns. I’m always wary of a man who has a game-show host name.